Leo's Blog: Infinite Insights

Miscellaneous bits of wisdom and resources on personal development, life purpose, philosophy, epistemology, nonduality, psychedelics, etc. Published randomly throughout the week.

  1. penetrating mental vision or discernment.
  2. the sudden act of grasping the inner nature or truth of a situation.
  3. a deep understanding of a person or thing.
synonyms: intuition, discernment, perception, awareness, understanding, comprehension, grasp, apprehension, penetration, acumen, perspicacity, acuity, vision, wisdom, recognition, realization, epiphany, ah-ha moment

Insights here are meant to be quick and half-baked. Consider these food for thought.

I've deliberately disabled comments to keep the blog streamlined. If you want to discuss any of the blog posts, you can do so here: Actualized.org Forum

February 6, 2023

Mathematician explains infinity in 5 levels of difficulty:

No mathematician understands what Infinity really is. Infinity is not a quantity, it is not a number, it is not set theory, it is not category theory, it is not even mathematics.

Infinity is the whole of reality itself.

Infinity is reality. Infinity is God. Infinity is Love. Infinity is Truth. Infinity is Consciousness. Infinity is You.

Infinity is infinitely larger than the entire domain of mathematics. Mathematics is a subset of Infinity.

Infinity is so large that your cat is Infinity.

Your dog is Infinity.

Your chair is Infinity.

Rape is Infinity.

That's how profound Infinity is!

Infinity does not belong to mathematics, mathematics belongs to Infinity! This is a common mistake mathematicians and logicians make. They got the whole thing backwards. Mathematics is a subset of Consciousness. Therefore it is impossible to understand Infinity from within the domain of mathematics. To understand Infinity you must understand Consciousness at the highest, most holistic level. Which no mathematician understands. The only one who can understand Infinity is a mystic. Which is prohibited in current science. Therefore no scientist can understand Infinity. It's a sad state of human ignorance.

February 4, 2023

Great video demonstrating the lessons I taught in my videos: The Metaphysical Implications Of Godel's Incompleteness Theorem and What Is Paradox?

To this day logicians do not comprehend the significance of this paradox. This paradox results from the problem of self-reference, which leads to a circularity that demonstrates the impossibility of a finite system being able to grasp reality. What logicians and scientists still don't understand is that these paradoxes occur because the ultimate nature of reality is Infinite. You cannot ever capture Infinity no matter how hard you try, because the thing you're trying to capture it with, is itself. It's like you're trying to use a knife to cut itself.

"The fly that doesn't want to be swatted is safest if it sits on the fly-swatter." — G.C. Lichtenberg

Contemplating these paradoxes when I was in my early 20's lead me to realize that reality is infinite, unformalizable, trans-logical, and beyond the comprehension of scientific method. At that time I didn't even know about God or Awakening, but I already knew reality was too elusive for human logic to grasp it.

Reality cannot be logical, it must be trans-logical. Logical people are very stupid for not understanding this. And this fact is virtually not understood by all scientists, academics, mathematicians, and logicians. Even though they know these paradoxes, they are not intelligent enough to see the full consequences of these paradoxes for the ultimate nature of reality.

The bottom line is this: You literally cannot calculate God because it is too mysterious. And you are a fool for thinking you ever could.

February 1, 2023

This guy made a whole YT channel explaining the corruption within academia that only insiders know:

This is why Truth cannot be found within academia and why science is clueless about the ultimate nature of reality. Academia loves to posture as though it's all about objectivity and facts, but in practice it's filled with human bullshit and political games because priority #1 is survival, not Truth. And yet, mainstream normies go along living life as though science & academia was just objective fact with no deep epistemic or metaphysical corruptions.

Good luck getting an academic to understand a thing when understanding it will undermine the entire system to which he has sold is soul. Academics are as lost in group-think as everyone else in society. Academia is a game and a pyramid scheme.

That's why I didn't go into academia. To me this whole scheme was obvious at age 21 — it disgusted me — and what disgusted me even more is that no one else saw it. It was like I was the crazy one for pointing this out. There is a sort of implicit gaslighting that takes place where you feel bad for pointing such things out — like you are being the asshole for pissing on everyone's gravy train. But the reality is simple: you can't find Truth in a university.

January 31, 2023

Some daring folks started a "church" around a new psychedelic chemical called Psilomethoxin, which is 4-HO-5-MeO-DMT. They make this chemical by growing psilocybin mushrooms laced with 5-MeO-DMT. Supposedly the chemical breaks down into 5-MeO-DMT in the body after oral consumption. It produces a 4hr long version of a typical 5-MeO-DMT trip. The trip is milder but longer.

Church Website

I am merely sharing this information for educational purposes. I have not tried it and I do not endorse or vouch for its safety. If you decide to try it, assume all responsibility and legal risk for yourself. Do your research so you are aware of any legal risks you may be getting into. I am just sharing this with you as news within the psychedelic community. In the future this chemical may become popular, although I would still prefer plugging pure 5-MeO-DMT. If you want longer trips, you can plug it as many times as you want. I've done 10-hour long trips. Just beware, it will completely destabilize your mind to a dangerous degree, so I don't recommend toying with such things. Please don't hurt yourself.

Here's a video about Psilomethoxin:

January 30, 2023

As passionate as I am about psychedelics, I need to underscore that psychedelics are dangerous. Not just dangerous, very dangerous. These are not toys. I see that many who follow me are young, immature, ungrounded, underdeveloped, mentally unstable, and could badly harm themselves with psychedelic overuse.

I've gone so deep down the psychedelic rabbit-hole that I am more and more aware of their dangers to the general population. There is a good reason why this stuff is banned in many places. Using psychedelics properly is not easy, and even for someone as mature and responsible as myself, I have had some near-lethal encounters. Simply because if you do them hundreds of times, just by raw probabilities, things will go sideways as you lose your grip on reality.

If you are using psychedelics, make sure that you are extra careful:

  • Do not over use them.
  • Do not fool yourself that they will be a shortcut to avoid all the difficult, grinding spiritual and developmental work.
  • Be careful not to use them as a bypass for basic developmental work.
  • Be careful not to destabilize your mind and life too much. Staying grounded is extremely important.
  • Have a strict protocol you follow. Set guidelines for yourself of what you are not allowed to do while on them: no texting, no emailing, no social media, no driving, no handling guns or weapons, no sitting in high places where you could fall or jump off, no walking around in public, no working in the kitchen, no investment or spending decisions, no relationship decisions, etc. Be extra careful that you do not physically injure yourself.
  • Be careful that you do not become suicidal due to their use. If you are starting to lose your sanity or groundedness and are having suicidal thoughts, you need to discontinue use immediately, reground yourself, and possibly seek therapeutic help.
  • Do not toy with unproven combinations and unknown/unproven chemicals.
  • Be careful that you are not spiraling mentally out of control and ruining your basic human life, career, relationships, finances, etc.
  • Be careful that you do not follow through on some harebrained idea to "unite with God" by killing yourself.
  • Be careful that you don't get lost in a maze of your own mind, spinning elaborate fantasies, delusions, and projections.
  • Be careful that you don't use psychedelics to build up an elaborate new spiritual ego. Watch out for arrogance and delusions of grandeur. Yes you are God but don't let that go to your head.
  • Take care for your health: maintain good nutrition, exercise, go to the doctor for regular check-ups, etc. Pay attention to whether psychedelic use is having a negative impact on your physical health. If it is, discontinue use.
  • Do not let psychedelics take you off track with your education, life purpose, career, business, family obligations, etc.
  • Give yourself plenty of time and space for fully integrating each trip before you jump into the next.
  • Make sure you have some manual spiritual practice besides psychedelics.
  • Make sure you are not developing a psychological addiction to psychedelics.

If you use them a lot and go deep with them, psychedelics truly are dangerous for most people. So please be careful and mature about how you approach them. Do not fool yourself by thinking that you are above such things. People will definitely end up  hurting themselves as psychedelic use becomes more normalized, so take this issue seriously. Do not be that guy who ruins psychedelics for the rest of us. Treat them with the care and respect they deserve. And if you are younger than 21, I recommend you hold off on using them because you are just not mature enough yet to use them responsibility and you could easily destroy your life.

Healthy & mature psychedelic use requires a solid foundation of personal development work. So build that! Do not fool yourself that you can bypass that for some quick gains. Psychedelics are not to be thought of as a shortcut.

January 27, 2023

Reflecting on my own selfishness, I felt it was hard to trust my own assessment of myself. Nor could I trust the opinions of my online critics, who sometimes accuse me of narcissism. I wanted to find some objective metric. So I found this brief online Narcissistic Personal Inventory.

You can take the narcissism test here to see how you score.
(It's free and only takes 5 minutes.)

I scored 13/40. Higher scores indicate greater narcissism.

The average US adult in 2009 scored 15.3/40
The average US celebrity in 2009 scored 17.8/40

I'm surprised I didn't rank higher.

There is a further breakdown of narcissism by "facets", which for me came out as:

Authority: 6/8
Self-Sufficiency: 4/8
Superiority: 2/8
Exhibitionism: 1/8
Exploitativeness: 0/8
Vanity: 0/8
Entitlement: 0/8

You can share your results with the Actualized Forum here.

January 25, 2023

Drinking clean water is one of the most important health upgrades you can make to your life. If you're drinking tap water, you're insane. And bottled water is such a hassle and probably contains plastic.

Here's the system I use, it's one of the best on the market:

APEC 6-Stage Reverse Osmosis System

It's got the maximum filtration you can find, with 5 stages, plus an extra 6th stage for adding back minerals and making the water alkaline. It's now been 1 year since I installed it in my kitchen and I just did the first annual filter change. I was skeptical of how everything would work. Well, everything is working flawlessly! No leaks, easy filters changes, affordable filters, and filter bundles are sold on Amazon with fast Prime shipping. And best of all, the water tastes perfect!

The other nice thing is that you will never run out of clean water ever again, never having to drive to the store in the middle of night. Lugging around gallons of water each month from the store to your house is a needless pain in the ass. Never again!

Filter changes are done every 6-12 months. A full set of filters (all 6) costs $130, but half of those filters last 2 years. So the cost comes out to about $10/mo in filters — which is totally worth it for having the purest water money can buy. The system will pay for itself within 2 years, so it's a no-brainer investment. The sooner you install it, the more money you will save. The bigger your household, the more you will save. If you have a family of 4 you will save so much money.

The only downside is that you will not be able to install this particular unit in a rented apartment. Although you may be able to talk your landlord into letting you install it at your expense and just leave it there permanently, adding value to his place after you move out. If you're gonna live there longer than 2 years it will still be worth it for you. Installation cost is about $150-$200 if you hire a handyman. Filter changes are easy enough to do yourself.

Yes, this system filters out heavy metals and pretty much anything else. This water is as pure as bottled water. The only thing purer would be distilled water, which is dangerous for humans to drink because it is too pure. Having minerals in your water is essential.

Full Disclosure: Amazon affiliate links above. Your purchase helps support Actualized.org. This review was not sponsored. I'm just happy the system worked out because I was initially worried there might be unexpected complications and I didn't know which brand or system to trust. APEC makes a great product and this is their top-of-the-line system. Everyone should have this in their home. Not only do you get clean drinking water, you also get clean cooking water. You don't want to be boiling rice & pasta with tap water years on end.

P.S. For you renters who cannot install the above system, a smaller countertop version is available which does not require drilling holes in your kitchen. It's not as robust of a system but still pretty good, and you can add a calcium carbonate remineralization filter on top of it. I have not personally tested this one but the Amazon reviews seem quite good:

APEC Countertop RO System

January 22, 2023

What ordinary humans consider to be "hallucinations" not really hallucinations (since everything is a hallucination), they are just God's imagination — Infinite Imagination — at work in non-ordinary states of consciousness.

You can't really understand things like Schizophrenia without God-Realization.

Schizophrenia is like an extreme form of openmindedness. Your mind/consciousness is so abnormally open that reality itself becomes less material and more fluid — similar to being on mushrooms. This kind of openness correlates with high creativity because a lot more novel ideas are floating into your field of consciousness. But your mind is so open that these ideas literally start to morph your material world. A coffee table could start talking to you and giving you novel ideas. The trade-off is that your mind is less buttoned-up, so it literally starts to feel like you're going insane.

How would you react if all the sudden your coffee table started to talk to you? Would you be open to listening, or would you freak out and run to the doctor to put yourself on meds to suppress it? Most people would freak out because they don't have a proper context for it. Under the materialist paradigm the only context is that you're going insane. But if you understand how consciousness works then there's really nothing wrong about it, you just have an extra-open mind.

The notion that talking to your coffee table is "irrational", "crazy", or unscientific is just wrong. There's nothing unscientific about it. In fact, it is unscientific to call it unscientific because under the right states of consciousness people can talk to their coffee tables and this is not a bug, it's a feature. You have to be very careful about privileging one state of consciousness over another. This is an unscientific bias. No state of consciousness is superior to any other. No state of consciousness is truer than any other. They are just different, with various pros and cons. But humans are very judgmental and demonizing of states of consciousness which are unlike their own. This is just another form of bigotry. When a scientist says that some non-ordinary state of consciousness, like schizophrenia, is irrational or crazy, he is being a bigot. Rationality does not have a monopoly on reality, as it is commonly assumed.

With that said, of course not all states of consciousness are equally functional. Some forms of schizophrenia may be highly maladaptive to living in modern society. Evolution and natural selection have carefully shaped mankind's default state of consciousness over millions of years to be hyper functional for survival in the kinds of environments that humans usually find themselves in. This is what creates the illusion of material reality. Reality is not at all material, but it seems that way because all the immaterial, dream-like aspects have been pruned off in order to make it possible for humans to excel in activities such as business, engineering, socialization, and war. You know what happened when the US military gave LSD to soldiers to make them better killers? The soldiers refused to fight each other because they experienced too much love. You literally have to be very closed-minded to kill people!

In other words, the reason humans are so materialistic, rational, and business-like by default is because all the humans with dreamy default states of consciousness were killed off by the business-minded ones. Consider the possibility that 2000 years ago all humans were much more dreamy by default than they are today. But war killed them off and selected for the most materialistic, rational, and business-minded ones. Which is to say, all the most spiritual humans were killed off long ago. Which is why humans today struggle so much with being spiritual whereas in the ancient past people were much more mystically inclined. This wasn't merely a cultural shift, it was a shift at the genetic level. Nobody understands this! Ta-Daaaaa! It's even possible that Neanderthals were more spiritual than humans but were killed off by the more business-like and war-like humans. Science & history has yet to appreciate such matters because they take state of consciousness for granted.

The downside of being spiritual is that you're weaker at business. Which is why businessmen and scientists have no souls ;)

January 21, 2023

This is the stupidest thing I've ever seen. I just can't...

The reason God doesn't stop a child rapist is because you're too stupid to understand that child rape is only a problem IN YOUR MIND!

Nowhere else is child rape a problem but in the mind of a human! This is obvious because child rape is not even a problem in the mind of a child rapist. It's not that the child rapist is delusional, it's that you are delusional for assuming that wrongness is an objective thing.

There is zero scientific evidence that child rape is wrong. If you were serious about science, you would admit this.

By definition, everything "wrong" is the projection of a subjectively biased mind. If you didn't have an ego, nothing would be wrong. Which is why objective empirical science never finds "wrong". Only egos find wrong. Realize this simple fact: Science has never, ever found anything wrong in the Universe. Nor will it ever find anything wrong because there isn't anything wrong. The Universe isn't wrong, it just happily exists.

The reason God doesn't stop child rape is because God is too conscious to judge it as wrong. For God to judge child rape, God would  have to lower itself to an atheist's level of intelligence. Which is not much higher than that of a baboon.

What's not being understood by humans is that human whining is so petty in the grand scheme of things that it cannot influence God's designs. You want God to care about whatever you're whining about. But God has bigger fish to fry and you are too narrow-minded to appreciate that. Hence you call God evil or say it cannot exist.

Imagine it this way: Should all of human civilization stop and change its designs just because a few ants in South America are whining that their life is harsh? Likewise, neither would God. The only ones who think the whining of ants is important are the ants.

Even deeper, you assume that God can change itself. God does not have any power to change itself because it is Absolute Truth. God cannot change its own design. Because the design is Absolute Perfection. If God could improve its design, God would be evil because that means God has been negligent in improving itself.  God cannot improve itself because it is already maxed out. It is only a human ego that could be so selfish and stupid as to want to change the entire design of reality to suit its own petty agenda.

If you take what I said here to be some kind of endorsement of child rape, you're really not intelligent nor serious about science. I fully endorse the policing of child abuse. But the more you whine about immorality, the less intelligent you demonstrate yourself to be. Which is why the least developed people are moralists. It's ironic that atheists, rationalists, and scientists take moralistic stances, since it is a perversion of rationality, objectivity, and science. The whole point of science is to be objective. If you're gonna be objective then you have to admit that child rape is not objectively wrong, it's subjectively wrong.

Here's what typical human moralistic whining is like: You're whining that the ice cream store has too much chocolate ice cream and not enough vanilla, and you blame God for this. But from God's POV, the flavors are perfectly allocated. See, you made the mistake of thinking that God is supposed to allocate those flavors FOR YOU. But God didn't allocate them for you, God allocated them for itself. And God loves all the flavors equally. So again, the problem only exists in YOUR MIND. But you are too narcissistic to see that. So you gaslight God. Quite the douche that makes you.

See how simple and elegant this is? Beautiful! But seeing Beautiful requires serious Intelligence.

It's not that God takes glee in child rape, it's just that God is Infinite Imagination, and child rape is one of the many things Consciousness can imagine. If God couldn't imagine child rape it wouldn't be all-powerful. Think of it this way: if your mind couldn't imagine child rape, your mind would be pretty weak. Well, God is just an Infinite Mind, so child rape cannot be excluded no matter how much you may not like it. An Infinite Mind has no room to dislike itself or reject parts of itself. If it did so, it could not be Infinite. The way an Infinite Mind becomes a finite mind is by rejecting parts of itself. Which is how we get atheists and baboons. An atheist's mind is closer to that of a baboon than it is to that of God.

January 18, 2023