How To Have Amazing Sex (For Women)
By Leo Gura - March 23, 2015 | 39 Comments
How to own your man’s heart & balls
Hey, this is Leo for Actualized.org, and in this video I am really excited to be talking about how to have amazing sex as a woman. Obviously, this version here is for the ladies.
Alright, ladies! From the guy’s perspective, in this video you are going to find out what it is like to have amazing sex. What this is going to do for you in your relationship is that it will basically allow you to own your man’s heart.
If you want a really strong relationship, one of the best ways to get into a man’s heart is through his pants because we are extremely dirty and sexual men. We want a girl who understands this. The mindsets, principles and practical techniques you are going to learn in this video are going to put you in the top 1%, if not higher, of all women on Earth who know how to have sex.
You are going to be the best of the best if you practice what I tell you here. This kind of stuff, I see very few girls know how to do. This is going to put you in a whole new a category, a whole new class. When a man meets you, he is going to want to keep you.
Are you having trouble having sex with a man and then he doesn’t call you back? Well, one of the reasons is because you don’t give him amazing sex and amazing sex is a rare commodity these days. So, why don’t we get you up to speed?
As a caveat, of course these are my own perspectives and opinions. People might have different opinions. Some men might not like everything that I am telling you in this video. You are going to have to go through with it and practice, play around with it, experiment and see what works.
Use the stuff that works. If it doesn’t work, don’t use it. But, what I am telling you is that I am willing to bet that 80% of men or maybe even 90% of men that you use this on will absolutely fall in love with you. Those other 10%, they want something else and you will have to figure that out.
Your Job In The Bedroom
What is your job in the bedroom? I have a video that is actually similar to this one, but it’s for men. It tells men how to have amazing sex and there, I say that it is actually mostly the man’s responsibility to produce amazing sex in the bedroom because he is the one who is leading and he is the one who is dominating.
Therefore, it’s his job to lead and dominate. Therefore, he is responsible for like 90% of what goes on in the bedroom. Nevertheless, there is that 10% or 20% that you, the women, are responsible for. What exactly is this?
To me, it’s being feminine, being girly, being dirty and surrendering in the bedroom. This is what your domain is in the bedroom. By the way, if you haven’t guessed this already, we are kind of talking about this as a dynamic where he is the masculine one and you are the feminine one.
Some women are more masculine than some men. Like I said, there are outliers here. But, we are generally assuming that you are the feminine one in the relationship and he is the masculine one. If that is the case, this is going to all work really nicely. That is the assumption.
Your job is that. Also, your job is to play up his masculinity. Amazing sex comes from this polarization that happens. He’s acting very masculine, you’re acting very feminine and there is like this charge and this energy in the air that happens. It’s this excitement.
This is what makes the most amazing type of sex and the most passionate kind of sex. That is generally what you are going to be doing. If you just use those principles right there, you can already start coming up with little techniques and tricks in your own mind on how to play up your femininity and his masculinity.
That already is basically going to be the source from which all of the little techniques that I give you going forward here are going to come from. Before we get into those techniques, let’s just start with a basic foundation. The basic foundation begins even outside of the bedroom.
Good Nutrition, Exercise, Style and Hygiene
Really, as the woman, for you, it begins with good nutrition and exercise in the gym. This point right here is perhaps the most important point of the whole video. If you only do one thing from this video that will please your man the most, it’s this right here. It’s good nutrition and exercise.
Especially these days, this is so rare in a girl. I would say over 50% of girls these days are overweight. They eat horrible food. They have no respect for their body and they have no sense of proper nutrition.
They don’t go and they don’t exercise. Basically, they just coast on their good looks or on their youth. Basically, if this is the case, as the man, if you have a quality man, he is looking out after his body too. If we’re looking out for our bodies, we want you to be looking out for your bodies.
A quality man is going to want this because if you’re coasting on your good looks right now, that is not going to last forever. As men, we are sensitive to this kind of stuff. For example, if men are leaving you, if men are having sex with you, but aren’t staying in a relationship with you, it is because they can see that you are not taking care of yourself or you are not meeting some other long term objective that they have.
Men are just totally focused on sex. We also care about the long term potential of the relationship. Because we do care about sex so much, we want that quality sex to last for decades. If you just do one thing, take care of your nutrition and go to the gym, that right there will turn your man on the most.
If you don’t even do anything else but that and you just keep your body in good shape, it already will endear you to your man’s heart. A lot of women have difficulties with this and they think – “Well, I shouldn’t be a certain way to please the man.” Don’t think of it that way.
Think of it as you improving your own health and your own nutrition. Then, it is spilling over and you are also satisfying the man. We have to be real here. Men are extremely visual creatures. We just are.
This is how we are wired. We can’t help it. When we see a fit, beautiful and hot woman, we want her. There is not even a question in our mind. It is instant and we just want her.
Make sure that it’s you, and not somebody else. Also, make sure that you are dressing sexy. As a woman, this is one of the advantages that you have. You can take a lot of time to dress nice and men appreciate a well-dressed woman. I am not going to go into the details of this because I am no expert on dressing.
You will figure that out, but the key fundamental points are these. Make sure you are dressing in nice and stylish clothing. This means new stuff and not stuff back from college days or high school, with holes and tatters in it. Also, make sure that you develop some sort of sense for style.
What is your style? Whatever it is for you, something that matches your body type and that matches your personality. Just get those two things down. The last point of this basic foundation is hygiene.
Make sure you are clean, everywhere. Make sure your body smells nice. Make sure you shave and make sure you wax well. There is nothing worse than an otherwise beautiful girl who doesn’t care about her body. It’s like a waste.
Make sure that you take care of everything downstairs, so that you smell nice downstairs and so that you are shaven, waxed or have a landing strip. Make sure that it is nice and pruned, so that you don’t have some giant bush down there or a weird fishy smell. Nothing turns off a man more than that.
That should be pretty easy to take care of. That is the foundation. One other point that I want to make is kind of about the foundation. That was about the external foundation. Here is a point about the internal foundation, your psychology.
The psychology for good sex is that you can’t be neurotic and anxious. If you’re having neurosis and anxiety, you are not going to be having really good sex. There are three things that you really need to fix in your psychology. These are kind of like big obstacles to having great sex.
The Three Big Obstacles To Having Great Sex
One is prudishness. Two is the inability to let go in the bedroom. Three is the inability to be present and to be in the moment. Let’s briefly talk about each one of these.
Prudishness means that you have hang ups about sex. You are afraid to be dirty. You are afraid to look at yourself in the mirror or you don’t want to look at him. You have some sort of a religious background or your parents were very conservative.
They taught you that if you’re going to have sex, you’re a slut. Sex is evil and all this kind of stuff. I am not going to go into too much detail about that here, but you basically need to cut out all of this prudishness.
Cut it out. We don’t need to pretend here. We’re adults and it’s okay. Sex is one of the most amazing aspects of life and there is nothing dirty about it. There is nothing evil or sinful about it if you do sex responsibly.
The prudishness is not necessary. In fact, it is holding you back from some of the greatest experiences in life. It is holding you back from that really intimate connection that you want with your man. The more dirty things you share with him, the deeper the connection goes.
Honestly, who else are you going to share this dirty stuff with? It’s only with your intimate partner, nobody else. This is like the unique bond that you develop between your man and you. The next point is the inability to let go.
You need to be able to surrender in the bedroom. This is the woman’s role in the bedroom, to surrender. This means you need to be able to get outside of your head, forget about your fears and stresses from everyday life, forget about the kids, forget about the problems at work and be able to let go and surrender to the man so that he can dominate you.
This is the dynamic in the bedroom. Anything that is preventing you from doing this, make sure you get that out of the way. Also, this is the next point, but it is very similar and very closely related. It is the inability to be present and in the moment.
Great sex comes from being in the flow, totally present, not inside your head and not distracted by other things. If you’re not able to be present, you might have difficulty even orgasming, which some girls have difficulty with. Make sure you fix this basic stuff. I am not going to even touch on that here. Maybe I will have some other videos that will help you with diagnosing and solving each one of these problems, but this is really outside of the scope of this video.
The Key Points And Techniques
What I want to do next is that I want to get you some of these techniques, the hot and sexy stuff. The first point is study how to give amazing blowjobs. This is also kind of outside the scope of this video. I am not going to tell you how to give an amazing blowjob.
I think you can figure that out. Go and watch a tutorial video, go read up on it, buy a book at a bookstore or talk to your girlfriends about it. Buy an information product. I don’t care how you do it, but figure out how to give amazing blowjobs.
Most women do not know how to give an amazing blowjob. In fact, they give painful blowjobs. Don’t let that be you. The way how you learn to give an amazing blowjob is basically through experience and iteration. One thing you can do is to give a blowjob, then ask the man what he liked about it or did not like about it.
Have him be specific, so that he is not just giving you sweet little words of affirmation, but actually this. You ask him – “Baby, did you like that or do you like this?” Be specific and actually get the technique down. Get the technique down because this is one of the gifts that you can give as a woman, to the man.
It’s giving him an amazing blowjob. I find that few women know how to do this well, so when we, as men, find a woman who knows how to give an amazing blowjob, it’s like she is definitely a keeper. She is a rare woman. You want that to be you.
The next point is being slutty. I want you to be sluttier in the bedroom and even outside of the bedroom. One of the problems that men face with women is that women like to play coy all of the time. We men, we are very sexual and we are usually pretty open about our sexuality.
But women, it’s like they pretend they are not sexual a lot of times. Also, just from the man’s perspective, we go through life chasing women, initiating the conversations, trying to hit on women and all of this kind of stuff. We get rejected a lot.
Women play coy a lot. This is very frustrating for a man because, sometimes, our whole story in life is just this. I want sex, I go look for sex and I can’t get it because I am denied. These women are such hypocrites because we know that behind the scenes, these women are having tons of sex, but they are pretending like they are not.
This whole coy façade, break that down for your man. I am not telling you to literally be a slut and sleep around with everybody. What I am saying is, with your man, be extra slutty. That means want it all. Want his dick.
Want his cum, want to be tied up, want to have spanking, want anal, want to have sex outdoors, want to do a threesome and want to watch porn with your man. Want to play with toys. There is so much room to explore in human sexuality. There is so much stuff you can try and do.
Some of it is very tame. Some of it is really far out there. Everyone has their own comfort zone. I am not going to tell you where your comfort zone lies, but you should be basically pushing your sexual comfort zone. Be open to new things.
Show this to your man. Show that you are open with sex and that you are kind of a dirty girl, but for him. We don’t want you sleeping around behind our backs, but for us. We want you to be extra dirty, so don’t play coy with your man.
Sometimes, a very simple way that this can happen is, let’s say, you’re just driving in the car. This is an example that I can remember really turned me on. A girl I was with, during the day, we were driving to Ikea or some place. It was in the middle of daylight, in the afternoon. I am driving and she just kind of playfully takes her fingers, puts them on my knee and kind of walks them up my knee towards my crotch.
She has this little cheeky smile on her face. She was kind of insinuating that she was going to unzip my pants, but she didn’t really. That, right there, that was enough. That was a rare thing that most girls won’t do, because she was actually putting herself out there.
She was acting a little bit slutty, but it was awesome. This is exactly what we want, as men. We want a girl to be this way. The next point that I am going to make is going to be a really big point.
Be More Feisty And More Active
This is kind of a whole theme, so you can remember this whole theme. It is the theme of being feisty and active. In general, women are too passive in the bedroom. We want you to be more active and feistier. I have already started talking about this.
I am going to give you a whole list here. If you want, you can write them down and come up with your own ways to be more active and feisty. Number one is initiate sex more. Initiate sex on the man. This is hot.
We like this. Like I said, most women play coy and a lot of women just won’t initiate sex. It’s like if the man doesn’t go, grab you and undress you, you won’t even want sex. We do not like that. We like you to come up and rub yourself on us, to grab our crotch, squeeze our butt and put your hands on us.
It’s that kind of stuff. Make sure you are doing that. Some women are just way too passive. This is kind of natural because in the bedroom, you are surrendering and playing that more passive role. The man is dominating you, but don’t let it get out of hand.
We don’t want you to be so passive that you are like a limp fish, just lying there and taking it in the bedroom. We want you to be active. Surrender in an active way if that makes any sense. Use your hands.
I think your hands can be used very effectively, especially because this can be done very femininely. Gently caress your man, his face, his arms, his chest, his legs and his thighs. Squeeze him and be active in that way. That is like a subtle way that you can be active.
Use your hands in interesting ways. Like I said, with that girl, she had this clever approach of just kind of walking her fingers along my thigh. That was really cool. Make sure you are coming up with little techniques like that.
The next way that you can be really feisty and active is with the vocals. Vocals can turn a man on, huge! If I just record a woman moaning from sex on a tape recorder and then I play it just for a guy who is sitting there and working, he is totally in a logical headspace, he is probably going to get hard and he is probably going to start dripping from his dick.
This tells you that this turns us on a lot. Play it up, too. Make sure you are purring. Make sure you are purring even when we are outside the bedroom, like when we kiss you or when we touch you. Kind of purr and moan, get those girly noises that you make.
Those are hot. Of course, when he is actually having sex with you and it is getting really hardcore, then make sure you are screaming out his name. You are screaming out what you want him to do and all of this kind of stuff. This is amazing. We want this.
As men, we have also got a lot of ego tied in with the way that we have sex. It is almost like this. If we bring a girl home and we bang the shit out of her all night, she’s yelling and screaming our name, it’s like our neighbors are wondering what happened at our place the next day. That dude is the man, like he is the man. He’s got his shit together.
He’s awesome. We have a bit of ego tied in with sex, so give that to your man. Scream your lungs out. Make the neighbors jealous. The next point is learning to grind your hips.
Strippers and pornstars are really good at this. Go to a strip club and look at how the stripper uses her hips in this sensual and belly dancing way. You can also watch good porn to see how this is done, but don’t just lie there in bed.
If you’re in doggy style, don’t just stick your ass up in the air and do nothing. That is lame sex. What I mean by being feisty is move your body along with the guy, as he is having sex with you. Learn to grind your hips back and forth, side to side, in circles and in both directions. That is super-hot.
I can’t tell you how hot that is. That right there can take sex that is a five, on a scale of one to ten, and put it to a ten. You can double the quality of sex just by grinding your hips in a really sensual way. The next point is dirty talk and intimate talk.
I find that women can be way too passive and shy about talking dirty in the bedroom. Dirty talk is huge. Dirty talk can take your sex into a whole new level. Dirty talk plus intimate talk connected together can double, triple or quadruple the quality and intensity of sex.
This is kind of beyond the scope of this video. I have another video that talks about how to do more proper dirty talk, but just a couple of quick examples. Here is an example of intimate talk. Intimate talk is talk that builds a little bond connection between you two, intimacy.
In sexual context, what that might mean is something like you going up to your man and saying – “Hey baby, I really love you. Come and make love to me.” It’s something like that. It’s that kind of sweetly and innocently talking and it’s building that bond connection.
For women, this is naturally easier than dirty talk, I think. Dirty talk is a little bit harder, but you should learn how to do dirty talk too. So, what is dirty talk? Here is an example. “Hey baby, I’m wet, come and bang my brains out.”
“Hey baby, I’m wet. Come and bang my brains out.” It’s something like that and it’s more hardcore. Think of it as something softcore and hardcore. What you want to do is mix those two together so you’ve got that intimacy and you’ve got that dirty animalistic sex combined together.
Make sure you are saying these things to him outside of the bedroom, during foreplay and then right when he is having sex with you in the bedroom. Also, when he is having sex with you, you should be telling him where you are in your orgasm. If you’re cumming, tell him that you are cumming.
If you’re about to cum, tell him you’re about to cum. If he really turns you on, tell him – “Hey baby, you really turn me on or I really like how you do this.” Make sure there is a dialogue. Don’t have silent and empty sex.
Silent and blank kind of sex, where it is just dead silence, you two are having sex and both of you are in your minds and thinking stuff, that is not sex. That is like a travesty of sex. A lot of women screw this point up. They do not tell us that they are cumming.
This is a huge mistake that a lot of women make. You need to tell the man that you are cumming and you need to have a whole thing. You need to turn it into a huge deal because as men, we take our pride into being able to make you cum, at least if we’re experienced in the bedroom.
If we’re sexually knowledgeable and we want to have great sex, we want this. So, you’re having sex and you’re getting close to cumming. You should start telling your man – “Hey, I’m starting to cum.” When you actually start cumming, you tell him – “Oh, I’m cumming.”
Keep saying it in whatever sexy way you want to say it so that we know what is going on. First of all, this helps us to lead the situation. It helps us to know what to be doing at what time because we need to be leading. Really, it turns us on.
When you don’t tell a man that you came, you are denying him a huge and important chunk of this whole sexual experience. In our minds, if you don’t tell us, we’re like – “Did you cum? Did she cum? Was that not good enough?”
We start questioning ourselves. Do not do that to your man. The next point is losing control of yourself in the bedroom. You can telegraph this to your man in exaggerated ways. Lose control of all of the different parts of your body.
Lose control of your hips. Start to move and kind of flail them around. Lose control of your butt. Lose control of your legs and get week in the knees. Throw your head back as though you’re having this orgasmic moment.
I remember that same girl that I was talking about, the one that was in the car. Another cool thing she did was when I was kissing her neck, she got so turned on by it that she played it up and kind of exaggerated it. When I started kissing her neck, she started moaning and throwing her head back.
You could tell she was getting turned on. She is going into heat and that is the hottest thing for a guy, when we see a girl going into heat. This is one of the best metaphors, right here. Think of yourself as a cat, a cat in heat that needs to rub her wet dripping pussy on her man.
That should be you in the bedroom and everything that comes along with that kind of metaphor. It’s losing control of yourself. You are surrendering and that makes the man want to dominate. That is so hot. Some pornstars are really good at this, so you might want to check out some porn and find a couple of pornstars that are really good at playing up this “cat in heat” metaphor.
The next thing you should be doing is asking and begging for your man’s cum. The cumshot is like the most important part of the sex, for the man, blowing our load. You should be asking for it. If you’re my girl, I want to hear you saying that you want my cum inside you, on your face, on your chest, on your mouth or in your mouth.
Everywhere and anywhere! We want to make you dirty, so get comfortable with being dirty and want the man’s cum. This is so sexy. There is a really big difference between a girl who is kind of like – “Uh, do you have to cum on my face? Why don’t you just cum over there, somewhere?”
There is that kind of girl, or the kind of girl that just doesn’t even talk. She just kind of ignores it. Wherever the man does it, she’s like – “Oh, okay! Whatever!” Then, there is the kind of girl who is like a cum fiend. It’s like she lives on cum.
You need to think of cum as though it’s your lifeline. If you don’t get the cum, you’re going to die. That is how I want you to behave in the bedroom. Make sure you are enthusiastic and excited about me cumming, your man cumming. That is so important.
I think this should go without saying, but I think it needs to be said because I have seen some girls botch this part. Your man needs to cum when he is having sex with you. I hope you understand this, but if you two are having sex, your man does not blow his load and you did not see him blow his load, that means he did not blow his load.
It is pretty obvious with men. We cannot hide it as well as you can. If this is not happening, make no mistake. Your man is extremely frustrated. Some women can have sex, not orgasm and still be satisfied. That is not the case with men.
Our biology is different. If we’re having sex and we don’t cum, we cannot cum for all sorts of reasons. For example, the reason is condoms. Sometimes, it can be really hard to cum with a condom. It can be hard to cum because if we are with a hot girl and we have anxiety about our size, our getting hard, about performing well or impressing you, we can have difficulty cumming.
Sometimes, we try to make you cum so much that we hold back our own orgasm and that makes it difficult for us to finally blow our load. There are all these different aspects to why a man might not be blowing his load. You need to be aware of this and you need to monitor this so that if he is having sex with you and he’s giving you all the pleasure, but then having difficulty cumming, you need to be patient with him and get him to cum by the end of the night.
Maybe you tell him – “Hey baby, let’s take a couple of minutes of a break and then get back into it.” Then, actually do get back into it. Maybe, he’s having difficulty getting hard or maybe the condom is the problem. Condoms are a problem for me sometimes.
Then, what you do is you say – “Hey baby, let me just give you a blowjob.” You give him a blowjob. Take off the condom, give him a blowjob and make sure he cums. Give him a handjob. Actually, it’s kind of easy with men.
If, for some reason, he is having difficulty cumming while having sex with you, just give him a blowjob or handjob and make sure it happens. This is so important, because if it doesn’t happen, he is going to get blue balls. He is going to be very frustrated.
He is not going to have that release. The man needs that release. It is so important. All of these things that I just said, this whole list of stuff; this is all under the umbrella category of being more feisty and active. Can you see how this works?
I want you to take this principle and I want you to brainstorm other ways that you can be more feisty and active and that we haven’t talked about here. You’re the woman, so you will know this stuff when you get in there and start trying it out and experimenting. All of the above – go ahead and try it out.
I am most confident that 95% of guys will love that stuff. They will just absolutely love it because it is pretty rare to find a girl who can do all of that. It is pretty rare. There are a couple of last points I want to make.
Point number one is be ready for multiple orgasms. If you’re having sex with a quality man who really knows what he is doing in the bedroom, he is going to want to give you multiple orgasms. Sometimes, what I see with some girls is they just get kind of get tired or whatever.
They feel – “I already got one orgasm and I’m good.” No, you can cum a dozen times in the bedroom. When I am lying with a girl, I expect her to want me to make her cum a dozen times. Be ready for multiple orgasms.
The second point is want to squirt. Squirting is super-hot. If you’re with a quality man, he is going to want to make you squirt. Some women are a little shy about it and a little insecure about it. I actually have a whole video How To Make A Girl Squirt, which talks about that. I won’t go into detail here.
That teaches a man how to make a girl squirt. If you have some sort of prudishness issues about squirting, you haven’t done it before or you have not even studied what squirting is, go ahead and read up on it, get a book on it or whatever. Watch a video on it and want it with your man.
Squirting is one of the peak experiences within sex that you two can have. It can build a huge intimate bond plus it’s super dirty and sexy. Want that. I love it when a girl is asking me to make her squirt, when she is excited about it.
That is a super turn on for me. The next point is show gratitude and respect to your man. You women, you’re a lot about love. You like to be showered with praise, positive emotions and love.
We men, we’re a little bit less about love. We’re a little bit more about respect because we have big egos. This is how we are different than you, so a little gratitude and a little respect goes a long way, especially if the man is leading a lot in the relationship. He is doing all of this stuff.
He is doing all the driving. He is doing some shopping and he is having dominancy in the bedroom. He is putting all of this stuff together and we put a lot of effort to plan stuff out for you and to be the leader in the relationship. It’s nice when we can see gratitude and that you are grateful for that and that you appreciate that.
Also, it’s the respect that you pay to your man. Having sex with a girl is hard and tiring work. Usually, by the end of the night, we are sweating, we’re tired, we’re exhausted and we’re barely breathing. That is how hard we were working, so a very simple example of how you can show respect to your man is this.
If your man just did an amazing job having sex with you all night, he’s totally exhausted and sweating profusely, maybe what you want to do is go get out of bed and go get him a glass of water or go get him a towel to wipe himself off. It’s a little gesture like that, right? It’s just like that little sense of nurturing, that little feminine touch and that little sense of “I respect you, I can see that you’re working hard for this relationship” is a beautiful thing.
The last thing that I am going to say is this. Some of you women, you are going to be watching this video and you will be thinking – “Leo, this all sounds amazing, but you’re asking me to work so hard to be this perfect girl for this man.” You might say there are two problems with this.
“Number one is that it is not authentically me. This is not who I am. I am not this kind of girl. Number two is even if I was that kind of girl, why the hell should I work so hard for this deadbeat man that I have? I have this man who doesn’t even make me cum once in the bedroom.”
“He doesn’t even care about making me cum. Leo, you are talking about this awesome man who is going to bang my brains out, make me want to squirt and give me multiple orgasms, but where do I find such a man?” You’re right, these men can be rare, but here is the thing.
You are putting this in the context of personal development. Remember, this is all personal development. I don’t see this as just a fun sex video. To me, this is personal development. Personal development is living up to your full potential, self-actualization.
How do you self-actualize? In one way, it’s by mastering the domain of sexuality, by taking yourself to the highest potential of sexuality. That is what this video is ultimately about. You’re not doing this just for the man. You are doing it for you, first and foremost.
See it that way. See it as expanding yourself, expanding your sexuality, experimenting and growing. It really is that way. This is not some hokey notion. Also, if you have a man who is kind of a deadbeat man in the bedroom, who can’t give you orgasms, who isn’t passionate about this stuff and isn’t trying to be a connoisseur in the bedroom, I agree with you.
There are not a lot of men who are good at sex and they don’t really care about mastering sex. That is something that I am personally passionate about changing. I shoot videos for men on how to have sex and I want to convince them that squirting is amazing. Giving multiple orgasms is amazing.
I will teach them a lot of amazing techniques. What I find is that men are not as perceptive to this stuff. It takes them a while to get up to speed and sometimes, they feel like – “If I have to be told how to have sex, it’s like bad.” Their ego is in it and they don’t want to be told.
They feel like they already know how to have sex. They need to humble themselves a little bit, before they actually learn. Let me work on the men for you and I will try to create more men who are more responsible in the bedroom and give you orgasms and all of that stuff.
As far as what you are going to do though, you are going to think about it like this. You are growing yourself into the ideal sexual girl. You’re opening up your sexuality. If your current man is not accepting of that, that is okay. You are still going to grow.
Don’t hold yourself back on his account. A couple of things are going to happen. One is that he is going to see that you are growing sexually and that you are putting so much energy and attention into being more sexual. He is going to get the message.
In his mind, he is going to be like – “Oh, maybe I should learn how to have better sex too.” Then, you two can actually do it together. That can be like a growth experience. That can be really fun.
You might be the leader in this way and get him to get more involved with quality sex. Of course, some men, they won’t do it. They just don’t want to change. They are stuck in their ways, in which case, you still want to grow. Even if you are frustrated now, you know what?
This man you’re with, chances are you probably won’t be with him for long, especially if he is bad in the bedroom. The next man that you are going to be with, you want to prepare for him. The chances that you are going to stay with your man for the rest of your life, those are very small chances.
Chances are you’re probably going to have many more men in your future. That is okay. What you want to do is you want to develop yourself higher so that the next man that you find is also going to be on a higher level. When you become a connoisseur of sex and when you master sex, you are going to be on the lookout and you are going to attract other men who have mastered sex too.
When you have non mastered sex, then you are going to attract men who have not mastered sex. I think it is really important that you take this seriously and that you study it. Buy some books. Don’t be shy about it. Watch some videos.
Don’t be shy about it. Buy toys. Buy porn. Research this stuff and study this stuff. You can buy even information products on this stuff.
You can even go and take a seminar, a whole weekend workshop on this stuff. It is all about seeing why this is important, seeing that it is not just about sex and that it is really about taking yourself to a higher level. Put this in the context of your personal development.
Well, that was a lot of information, a lot of techniques and practical stuff that you can go and implement right now, today. What I recommend you do is implement one thing at a time, experiment and just see how your guy reacts to it. What you are probably going to find is that he is going to react really well.
Over time, over the course of six months or twelve months, you should envision yourself becoming this sexual goddess. It doesn’t take a lot of sex to become a sexual goddess. The problem is that most people have sex, but they are not learning anything in between. Therefore, they have sex and they do not improve.
What you want to do is have sex and then the next day, go and read a book about sex. The next day, have more sex. Now you are improving, applying the stuff you read in the book. The next day, maybe watch a video and then have some more sex. Again, you are improving and working on little aspects.
Get the blowjob down. Improve grinding your hips. Improve moaning and screaming. Improve dirty talk. Improve squirting and all of this stuff.
You can improve every single one of these areas. By the end of twelve months, if you do this actively, you are going to be at a whole new level. The kind of men that you will be able to attract and keep is going to really change because, like I said, the way to a man’s heart is through his pants.
This is Leo, I’m signing off. Go ahead and post me your comments. Click the like button to like this video. Share it with a friend. Finally, come and sign up to my newsletter at Actualized.org.
It’s a free newsletter. I release new videos on self-actualization topics every single week. I am excited to be doing more videos in the future about sexual topics because I think this is an important component of personal development.
It has been a really satisfying part of my life, to improve the quality of my sex and I am still excited to continue doing that in the future. There is still a lot of stuff that I have not tried and that I am excited to try with the right girl. If you’re interested in any of that or you’re interested in more general personal development topics, how to improve your relationship and that kind of stuff, I am all about giving you the psychology and the mindsets you need to master all of these different areas in your life and ultimately live up to your full potential.
So, sign up for that right now.