How To Exploit People To Grow Yourself
By Leo Gura - May 2, 2014 | 25 Comments
An advanced technique for taking your personal development to a whole new level.
Stupid People Everywhere
- What does it mean to exploit other people?
- It sounds nefarious, but this is one of the single most powerful personal development techniques that I’ve ever found.
- This is an advanced technique, suitable for someone who is already psychologically well-developed.
- As you study personal development and make positive changes to your life, you will start to embrace certain principles of success.
- These might be principles you learned here on Actualized.org, or from your family, or from someone like Tony Robbins.
- You will start to buy into the idea that to live a happy and successful life requires that you obey certain principles.
- Then, as you go through life, you will invariably have all sorts of relationships that will produce conflict.
- You will butt-heads with your boss, your co-workers, your family, your spouse, etc.
- This is all very natural. But because you are a little bit more enlightened than the common-folk, you are going run into a unique problem.
- Because you’ve studied and understood the principles, in this clash you will clearly perceive the other person as doing something stupid and unwise.
- You will be in a prime position to know exactly how others are fucking up their own lives.
- You will see people around you behaving in bad ways:
- Playing the victim
- This is going to make you feel very frustrated. You’re going to wonder, “Why aren’t these people seeing the dysfunction?! It’s so clear!”
In A Class All By Yourself
- Next, you will eagerly go to one of these people and tell him exactly how he’s sabotaging himself.
- But, much to your shock, that person will call your advice stupid, play the victim, and even lash out at you.
- If you’ve never experienced this before, it will trigger you emotionally.
- It’s going to make you feel very frustrated, and angry, and maybe even depressed.
- You’ll wonder, “Why isn’t is he being to petty and closed-minded? I just went out of my way to help him!”
- And from then on you’re going to start judging these types of people.
- You are going to start saying to yourself, “This guy should be doing better in this area of life. That girl should be doing better in that area.”
- Now you’re going to be in a mode of thinking that you’re better than other people.
- But it’s true! You are better than other people! You are wiser, you are more conscious.
- You clearly see how other people are sleep-walking through life.
- Everyone around you will be seen sleep-walking: your girlfriend, your boyfriend, your friends, your spouse, your parents, your kids.
- You will naturally feel like you’re above them, and this will create friction inside you.
The Exploitation Process
- This state of affairs points the way to a higher level for you.
- You can move onto a higher level only when you learn to exploit everyone around to your benefit.
- Here’s how:
- You see someone doing something wrong — something that breaks right principles — but then, instead of judging them, you turn that awareness back on yourself.
- When you see someone get angry, you turn it back on yourself and ask, “Wait a minute! How am I doing the same thing?”
- When you see someone being negative, you turn it back on yourself and ask, “Wait a minute! How am I doing the same thing?”
- When you see someone playing the victim, you turn it back on yourself and ask, “Wait a minute! How am I doing the same thing?”
- When you see someone behaving unconsciously, you turn it back on yourself and ask, “Wait a minute! How am I doing the same thing?”
- This is how to properly exploit people to further yourself.
- This technique is sooooo powerful. What you’re basically doing is Aikidoing the problem.
- The problem is that you have all these people around you behaving in unconscious ways. And you are tempted to go around lecturing them.
- But if you do that, your higher self will slowly start to get more and more disturbed.
- This will happen because your consciousness will start to see the unconsciousness and neurosis inherent in your lecturing.
- The wise you will see that there is something wrong with the way that you’re approaching people.
- What’s wrong is that you’re not being honest. You’re not registering those same flaws within yourself.
- No matter how far along your are down the path of personal development, there will always be ways in which you are behaving unwisely.
- But you will not want to admit this to yourself because you now have a self-image built around being the wise one.
- Sometimes you will behave unwisely in glaringly obvious ways. But most times it will be more subtle.
- You will be unconscious or angry or playing the victim, but in a way that’s not glaringly obvious, perhaps in some less visible part of your life.
- You’re behaving unwisely every single day. But as human beings we have a tendency to overlook our own flaws while easily seeing the flaws in others.
You’re Just Getting Started
- So what’s to be done?
- First of all, congratulations for walking up! You are now in the top 1% of humanity.
- But you’ve still go more growth ahead. Now you’re ready to move on to advanced personal development.
- In your current level you’re seeing the faults in other people.
- In your new level you will be using these dysfunctional people as a mirror to show you where you need to polish up yourself some more.
- You are also going to have to accept that the world is largely neurotic, and this cannot be changed, at least in our lifetimes.
- You have to come to peace with the fact that people will do stupid things and they may be beyond help.
- From now on you are going to commit to Aikidoing all the neurosis you see out in the world to help yourself.
- You will commit to exploiting everyone around you to iron out all your imperfections.
- This exploitation isn’t evil or negative because it hurts nobody.
- All you’re doing is using these people are reminders of what you should NOT be doing.
- After you start doing this, you’ll actually become very thankful.
- You will be thankful that all these unconscious people are around to serve as reminders for you to stay on the narrow path.
- For example, when you see someone self-destructing and getting angry at the traffic, that reminds you of how important it is that you keep doing your meditation every morning.
- You clearly see how your daily meditation is keeping you from being the angry person.
- Another example: when you get into the office, you notice a co-worker being critical and cynical about a new proposal.
- But now instead of getting annoyed at him, you look within yourself to see where you are behaving cynically in your own life.
- The other way that you can exploit negative people is to cultivate motivation for your own journey.
- People who are angry, negative, neurotic, helpless, etc. are excellent sources of motivation! Who wants to live their life like that?
- You will notice if you do a lot of personal development just how easily you can get acclimated to your good results.
- But when you see someone behaving badly, you can stop and realize, “Wow! That could have been me!”
- When you do this, you become more invested in the personal development process because you clearly see the payoff of all your hard work.
- All the sudden your desire to improve yourself burns even brighter.
The Wise Know They Have A Lot To Learn
- This technique is advanced, and takes you to a whole new level, because it takes incredible self-discipline to practice.
- This will not be easy for you. But the reward will be deep inner-peace.
- Your mind will always want to find flaws in others while conveniently ignoring your own.
- Your highest self will be put to the test if you commit to using this technique.
- Consider, if you wanted to be a great golfer, would you be great if you practiced hard for 2 years and then never practiced again?
- No! You would be rusty.
- The same applies to your personal and spiritual development. You have to practicing consistently.
- If you’re a student of personal development then you also recognize the importance of receiving constant reminders of the fundamental principles.
- It’s not enough to just read or hear about a principle one time. You have to immerse yourself in them until they become imprinted in your mind.
- Even if you’ve mastered a principle, your mind will still slowly backslide. You have to keep reminding yourself again and again.
- The wise know that they can never be so wise that they don’t need further reminders.
- Watch out for the trap of complacency. If you are doing good right now, that’s because you have good habits in place.
- As soon as your good habits wither, your results will wither as well.
- There is no resting on your laurels in personal development. You have to keep reminding yourself.
- The best way to remind yourself is by seeing reminders in the bad behavior of others.
Bottom Line: Commit to using the negativity in others as a mirror for seeing hidden flaws within yourself.
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