Happiness Bottlenecks - The Real Process of Being Happy and Successful

By Leo Gura - February 24, 2014 | 2 Comments

The big-picture, bird’s-eye-view of what it will take for you to reach the level of happiness and success you deserve.

Big Ideas

Myth of THE Secret

  • When you start the journey of personal development, you don’t even realize your started a journey!
  • At the beginning, you tend to have a single burning problem and you tend to think that there’s going to be THE ONE KEY.
  • You think something like: “If only I had ________, I would be totally fulfilled.”
  • The self-help industry’s marketing doesn’t exactly help.
  • There really is no one secret. Your life is complex. There are many areas in your life that you will need to work on to get to the level you want to be at.

My Journey As A Case-Study

  • The question that was driving me when I started 5 years ago was: “Why aren’t I more happy? Why aren’t I more successful?”
  • I started my search by looking for the ONE cause. This slowed my growth by making me doubtful and skittish.
    • At first I thought: I need to work out childhood issues (therapy)
    • Then I thought: I’m to pessimistic. I need to work on my positivity.
    • Then I thought: I’m too goal-driven. I need to be more in the moment.
    • Then I thought: I’m not patient enough. I need to adopt a mastery mindset.
    • Then I thought: I’m becoming too lazy. I need to harsher with myself, more disciplined.
    • Then I thought: I have the wrong goals. I don’t have my true life purpose in place.
  • When you haven’t studied this stuff and you don’t have a big-picture understanding of the personal growth, you become very confused because you are lost and don’t even know where to turn.
  • Stop tormenting yourself over finding that one silver bullet. The facts is, there are dozens of factors affecting your fulfillment.
  • You will need to spend time working on many different aspects of yourself. There is nothing wrong with this. In fact, it is the only true way.

The River of Happiness & Bottlenecks

  • Think of your happiness as a flowing stream of water — a river. You have created, or continue to create, bottlenecks that restrict its natural flow.
  • There are bottlenecks to your happiness and success. You gotta address the most urgent bottleneck first. Then that will reveal a new bottleneck afterwards.
  • One bottleneck could be addiction.
  • Another bottleneck could be negative, pessimistic thinking.
  • Another bottleneck could be serious money problems.
  • Another bottleneck could be lack of education.
  • Another bottleneck could be lack of vision or goals.
  • Another bottleneck could be an unhealthy relationship.
  • Another bottleneck could be a health problem.
  • You have to dig in and identify what is really clogging up your natural flow right now. What is your bottleneck?
  • What is holding you back right now from living your full potential? Sit down and answer this question!
  • When you dig into this, you will see that there will be a successive string of bottlenecks, so it dawns on you that you will be doing personal development for a long time if you really want to be happy and successful. Some of us longer than others.
  • Don’t get caught up on looking for a silver bullet. Instead, see the full picture of what you’re going to be doing.
  • And get excited about it! This is a cool thing. You are finally on a conscious journey to master yourself! This is the greatest thing you can do in your life.

Pinpoint Your Top 2 Bottlenecks

  • Pinpoint your current bottleneck, and commit to opening it up whatever it takes.
  • Also sit down and try to foresee what you second biggest bottleneck will be.
  • What are one or two action items you can start doing right now to open your 2 biggest bottlenecks?
  • Write down your best answers and begin taking action.

Working Multiple Bottlenecks At Once

  • You can work on multiple bottlenecks simultaneously, but don’t bite off too much.
  • You will need to chip away at some bottlenecks for months or years to get them fully resolved, so it’s nice to work on a couple at once. It’s like parallel processing in your computer!
  • Be very careful, though, that you don’t take on too much. You need to have enough conscious awareness to devote to each issue. If you see yourself constantly slipping, wipe the slate clean with a focus on just 1 bottleneck.
  • Sometimes you have to sacrifice life balance to resolve a bottleneck through sheer force. This is okay. Go out of balance, then remember to come back into balance a few months later.

Research Solutions

  • Without exception, every bottleneck can be resolved. So no excuses about how your situation is soooo bad that there is no hope for you. Stop this victim thinking. It is killing your results in life.
  • Start doing research for how to unclog your bottlenecks. You are not seeing all the options right now.
  • Realize: your problem is NOT special or new. Your problem is ultimately psychological, and thousands if not millions of human being have faced your exact same problem throughout the thousands of years of recorded human history. Solutions are out there if you just look.
  • We live in an information-product age. There is literally a resource to help you understand and fix ANY bottleneck you’ve got, no matter how peculiar, odd, or shameful it might seem to you.

Bottom Line: Realize that no one solution will get you the amazing kind of life you want. Identify your bottlenecks and work them out one by one.

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Comments
(2)
Bisente Gama says:

Hello Leo , thanks for responding to my last response, I am 57 years old I have been totally single for 28 year of my adult life,I am a accomplished bass player for 38 years, I have a very manageable disability and i am retired with a nice income each month and dont have to work for it , I print shirts and I make about $3.00 every 15 second profit printing shirts, I have a awesome girlfriend, I have no bills, I have no problem haven awesome sex, my kids get to go to a great collage and there step dad works there so they get free tuition,, in one year I have lost 60 pounds and lowered my chloreseral from 250 to 170, all my labs are perfect or below perfect, but i still cant seem to be happy, your videos are helping, what do I do? my girlfriend has never been married her dad was a mail shovenist pig, she makes love to only men she loves , I was struggling with pre marriage sex my minister says i am going to hell, but no were in the Bible says you are going to hell for haven sex, I think it say making love out of love is OK, I truly dont know what love feels like, I had a bad dad till he died at my age of 13, I dont think I have any bottle neck situation in my life, what are your thoughts about my situation, looking very forward to hearing back from you.

sabrina says:

Which book will u advice to know more what attract a man? Thanks

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