Decoupling Sex from relationships

[pablo_aka_god]

This is an idea that I’m exploring, I’m 28 years old and have never had a girlfriend. I’ve explored the PUA scene for a few years and have had a few fuck bodies and some 20+ girls I’ve slept with. However for some reason I struggle a lot to connect with women. I haven't had sex in the last 5 months and I know if I put my focus on daygame for 1 or 2 months I end up getting some. However I’m tired of this cycle of not getting sex, then focussing on game for some months while neglecting other areas, getting sex then having to stop due to LP commitments and then repeating this cycle.

 

This is not a rant, I write this because I’m still exploring possible solutions and here I will describe one that I will try for the upcoming weeks.

 

The desire for sex drove me into watching a lot of porn and even into spending 2K USD into a trip to Colombia to game there(way easier than in my city) but I changed my mind last minute and didn’t go so I lost that money(15% of my savings).

 

So I’m 28 years old, can’t connect with women and desire for sex is driving me crazy but I’m tired of working so hard on my game and so many rejections when I prefer to spend that time on other long term projects where I do see the benefits. I have plenty of assets: I’m healthy, average looking, dress well, workout, live in a beautiful part of my city in an expensive flat, I make good money, I have high quality friends and family which I hang out with every other day. I travel often. I’m at a point in my life where I’m satisfied with all life areas except relationships with women and I’m not willing to sacrifice some of the amazing lifestyle I have to do daygame and get treated as a weirdo by strangers. I know that when I do daygame I have to work out less and even see friends less to focus on the game, I can’t do everything.

 

The fact that I’ve had long and honest relationships with beautiful people(male friends) and I’ve created such a good lifestyle from nothing makes me realize that I’m capable of having a high quality relationship with a woman I admire. If I can do it with men I can probably do it with women too.

 

My idea is to pay weekly to some escort or massagist to masturbate me or bang me so that I can release my sexual tension, this way I stop watching porn and can release the tension for sex. Then I will continue growing my men friends cycle, working out, improving my appearance and doing personal development courses(I will do Tony Robbins UPW next month) and have some breathing room to work on the root cause problem in the long term rather than investing hours in game which seem to go nowhere.

Maybe I will hire a therapist or coach to work on this long term, but with the goal of being able to have fun and connect with women the same way I can do with my male friends

Edited February 18 by pablo_aka_god

[pablo_aka_god]

My goal for this year is to build a genuine connection with one woman! In order to focus on this I need to get sex out of my mind and this is the best way I can think of.

I already tried it yesterday by hiring an escort for 30 mins and it was amazing, it felt like 20 kg were lifted out of my shoulder 

Edited February 18 by pablo_aka_god

[Princess Arabia]

40 minutes ago, pablo_aka_god said:

So I’m 28 years old, can’t connect with women and desire for sex is driving me crazy but I’m tired of working so hard on my game and so many rejections when I prefer to spend that time on other long term projects where I do see the benefits. I have plenty of assets: I’m healthy, average looking, dress well, workout, live in a beautiful part of my city in an expensive flat, I make good money, I have high quality friends and family which I hang out with every other day. I travel often. I’m at a point in my life where I’m satisfied with all life areas except relationships with women and I’m not willing to sacrifice some of the amazing lifestyle I have to do daygame and get treated as a weirdo by strangers. I know that when I do daygame I have to work out less and even see friends less to focus on the game, I can’t do everything.

Work on your inner game. Those outer materialistic things isn't enough if you don't feel confident on your own. You mention them as if they are your idols but life will show you how they aren't, because they cannot substitute for inner peace happiness and joy, only compliment it. I said idols because you believed in them, you have worshipped them, you have made them your source of happiness, you thought they would bring you the love you so desperately feel is lacking. Learn to love yourself and the love you seek will follow suit. 

The difference between you and the others who've accomplished those things including finding love is a mindset. Whatever that may be. Getting sex is not the goal, as there's no problem there as you have seen. That's in abundance if you can afford it and don't mind getting release in ways you mentioned. Having someone in your life to share sex with and a loving relationship is another thing and will require more than just materialistic gain, but for you yourself to feel worthy of love.

[NoSelfSelf]

You dont know what game is that's the problem.

If you think game is about how to get laid then that's the product of your post.