BojackHorseman

Am I allowed to give up?

25 posts in this topic

Are you too stressed out? 


My name is Reena Gerlach and I'm a woman of few words. 

 

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3 minutes ago, Buck Edwards said:

Are you too stressed out? 

Stressing over stress creates even more stress.


I AM a devil 

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2 minutes ago, Yimpa said:

Stressing over stress creates even more stress.

I don't know if this is true. There's a difference between neat problem solving versus just worrying. 

 

Taking the bull by the horns and considering what is causing the stress can go a long way in permanently blocking it for good. 


My name is Reena Gerlach and I'm a woman of few words. 

 

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ive given up. nothing wrong with it, just gotta deal with the fact youve given up. keep pushing do what you gotta do. maybe something can change. saying no nothing will change is stupid cuz you dont know that. if you give up just expect a downward spiral and dont fool yourself and blame life or anybody. 

I was a Marine that was the best of my life. i missed it i was going to go mercenary just to get back into that kind of life but because of the pain it would cause my parents i didnt do it. caused me deeper distress and misery. ive tried and tried to make things worse chase dreams, fail fail fail. at one point i said fuck it. ill just roll through the motions maybe something happens, something doesnt, maybe i lose it one day and end up pulling the trigger WHO KNOWS. the last avenue of hope is that maybe something in the future will change. if you give up as i have that possibility still stands you just arent gonna be looking for it anymore. thats like the last thread (for me at least mind you military is all i know i hate the civi world) to prevent suicide but thats all it takes if you are really open to the possibility one day something may change. its a life that doesnt have to be a sorry, life its a sorry life if you let it be a sorry life. try not to get hooked on drugs, coke, H, bars. im not speaking from the choir ive done enough blow to kill a whale and im still here sadly its just gonna complicate things further. take life slow and take it with a grain of salt if your that miserable, as i am. keeps the days more predictable. if its not clear at this point its just PURE survival. it doesnt feel fulfilling but hey its life. i was told life sucks, suck it up, so i do, idk, anyways. hope maybe this helps u out a little coming from someone whos in the shit too and not somebody who has never experienced trying to take thier own life from failures and complete hate for their own life. people who live a good life will never understand our struggle we gotta stick together. 

maybe advice like "oh your problems are imaginary" will help you out, it doesnt help me out not one bit. even the one time i realized i was everything and nobody else exists but me. there is no HUMAN there is no other people there is no anything. that insight is gone, its meaningless now i cant even tell if it was real or just  a dream anymore. 

i advise you dont give up on self help at least take care of yourself and your body. this will create a little bit of comfort in you, cooking can create comfort in you if you learn to enjoy it. try new things but dont romanticize about them thats gonna bite you in the ass. 

good luck

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Thanks everyone forn your advices.

I now see more clearly and see that bipolarity's just getting the best of me.
I will try to be more aware of that and find a way to get through the bad version of me when this happens.
It's very hard to not get entirely choked by depression when the switch is off, but I'm conscious of this problem, so I have to remember to notice it and not let go of everything for the tinyest thing not going my way.

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