for fucks sake it's been 4 years and i'm still randomly having reactivations at night

[Monster]

hey i can emphatise i used to leave awful comments on all of rupert spiras videos for teaching non duality. funnily enough what really triggered me was the self inquiring

Edited February 1 by Monster

[LSD-Rumi]

I used to have flash backs after my first LSD trip. I actually enjoyed them. And every thing looked wierd for weeks after it. But all of this stopped immediately after I started taking antidepressants for my OCD.

[Giulio Bevilacqua]

I don’t know if you have taken any actions yet. I will add my pov and direct experience as i am going through something very similar too. 
Sincerely speaking, I think the issue was not the 5 but the attitude you had before and during the experience. It seems it opened you up but you closed yourself so you are hanging in a middle space.

As absurd as it may sound, having another session could be good and of help in cleaning that which is stuck. Probably a better with a facilitator.

I got tons of material and sources for this stuff which does not include the use of psychedelics. Let me know 

[khalifa]

@Giulio Bevilacqua

 

shoot your sources, and yes i freaked out for sure hence the terror was long

[Giulio Bevilacqua]

2 hours ago, khalifa said:

@Giulio Bevilacqua

 

shoot your sources, and yes i freaked out for sure hence the terror was long

https://m.facebook.com/groups/249329132110710/

https://www.truespiritualawakening.eu/ This has weekly meetings twice every week 

 Trauma  work and chronic pain with inquiry Scott Kiloby : https://kiloby.com/

[OBEler]

@khalifa I think these kiloby inquiry is too weak to solve your problem. One more 5 Meo breakthrough would be needed I think.

You can loose a lot of your fear with taking 5 Meo if you take many times just a little dose. I know someone who got blasted away from 5 Meo and was swearing after that that he will never take psychedelics again. But just by taking small doses the body learned  way to trust the substance more and more so the person had a smooth breakthrough after doing over 10 trips with low doses. Fear can go away with this 

 

Edited February 11 by OBEler

[Francis777]

@khalifa sounds like you've activated your kundalini but don't know what exactly it is and therefore resisting it all the time. My symptoms are very similar to yours, I've been suffering with them daily for 3 years.

Kundalini is not an energy, it is simply an expansion of your consciousness that when resisted can cause energetic symptoms, but don't think of it as energy. All expansion of consciousness happens in the present moment, you need to try and get out of your head and see how your consciousness is trying to expand into the present moment, then observe any resistance.

Kundalini can reveal specific conflicts that cause symptoms however it can also be just a very difficult adjustment to your new permanent state of expanded awareness, something new that collapses your old way of being, which is why it is scary and intense 24/7 because the old structures of yourself are fighting to survive and causing backlash on steroids.

@OBEler Might be right as well, its the same thing as what I'm saying essentially. Maybe you need to go back into to 5 MEO to rid your resistance to that expanded level of consciousness, as with 5 MEO it's so powerful it can create permanent changes. There's lots of stuff online about people having to go back in and "complete" their trips, there's lots of NN-DMT trip reports like this, look some up.

Edited February 11 by Francis777

[OBEler]

@Francis777 how was your Kundalini activated?

[ExplorerMystic]

On 27/1/2024 at 4:44 PM, khalifa said:

when does this shit stop? it's getting annoying

 

i mean sure i'm used to it but it's like a roller coaster, just when i think it's never coming again, nope just another day of a random night of hello, here's a weak baby dose of 5meo

 

this crap seriously has given me some serious PTSD/GAD chronic anxiety, never felt the same since 2019

 

the current symptoms i'm facing is 24/7 uneasyness anxiety, vibrations on my body, overwhelmed throat and tightness in chest.

my memory has taken a big hit too, sometimes i can't even tell if i've showered for the day or not, i used to have amazing memory before it, it has made me less assertive since i don't like to wrong anyone by being arrogant, and i start doubting my memory, my confidence has taken a big blow, i feel weaker than what i used to be mentally, noticed weak impulse control too, i feel like i'm a different nerfed like person that's unstable with his mind, i no longer feel stable with my well being and thoughts, it feels like i have some sort of ocd at times

My 2 cents on this (This is out of compassion which I feel after reading your post so don’t take anything negatively; If anything, I have written doesn’t resonate. Just ignore):

 

1)     This path is not for everybody. Its not at all glamorous as advertised. See if you want to go ahead on it or not and make a decision.

 

2)     Take any drug you want. In the end it will give you glimpse of that one Unitarian force, Oneness (give any name . It doesn’t matter), dept of understanding etc. But beware if you start acting like a Guru because there is no arrival here. People who say that they have arrived have taken a small chunk of understanding and start proclaiming it that they know it all are delusional. In Summary you have to be grounded , humble, fearless warrior on this work otherwise it will backfire in different ways you have not imagined.

 

 

3)     If you want to continue on this path suffering will be there. You need to see if it is worth it for you.

 

4)     You have to pay your bills and eat food to survive. Keep this in mind you have to be ready here because you may go broke and may live out in tent or homelessness. To tackle this you have to put some work . For example : Start working on your creative aspect which may be creating music, painting etc. Any art form which is saleable in the market and keep you going at least (food , Bill etc.). It is also true that help arrives once you are on this path in mysterious ways but you have to be ready to hustle here .  

 

5)     As you move on this path, apart from financial aspect which is mentioned above. You may face trouble in other aspect of life as well for example health, relationship etc. In other words, everything which you hold dear in your life will be tested.

 

6)     Do not take words of any Guru, books or others people understanding which they share online now days related to this path seriously. Because everyone understands this “LOVE” differently.

 

7)     Take medical help whenever you feel it necessary.

 

Lastly as I mentioned above. You never arrived on this path. The only thing that will happen as you get mature :

The aliveness you feel; Fearlessness; Ego (thought system) doesn’t control you & you will use it for creative endeavors & the list goes on..

[Giulio Bevilacqua]

1 hour ago, Francis777 said:

@khalifa sounds like you've activated your kundalini but don't know what exactly it is and therefore resisting it all the time. My symptoms are very similar to yours, I've been suffering with them daily for 3 years.

Kundalini is not an energy, it is simply an expansion of your consciousness that when resisted can cause energetic symptoms, but don't think of it as energy. All expansion of consciousness happens in the present moment, you need to try and get out of your head and see how your consciousness is trying to expand into the present moment, then observe any resistance.

Kundalini can reveal specific conflicts that cause symptoms however it can also be just a very difficult adjustment to your new permanent state of expanded awareness, something new that collapses your old way of being, which is why it is scary and intense 24/7 because the old structures of yourself are fighting to survive and causing backlash on steroids.

@OBEler Might be right as well, its the same thing as what I'm saying essentially. Maybe you need to go back into to 5 MEO to rid your resistance to that expanded level of consciousness, as with 5 MEO it's so powerful it can create permanent changes. There's lots of stuff online about people having to go back in and "complete" their trips, there's lots of NN-DMT trip reports like this, look some up.

Did you used psychedelics during the kundalini journey? If you are available for a chat would be cool 

[Francis777]

@Giulio Bevilacqua @OBEler I'm going to make a post in the future about my personal experience with it, too much to go into now.