I'm tired with my life.

[Sabth]

5 minutes ago, Phil King said:

Start off with something super small. Do 10 pushups. Do 10 jumping jacks. Make it so you dont have to rely on others for you to workout and stay healthy

I only wanna do long run and jog. These are the only things that I feel like makes a difference. 

[Phil King]

@Sabth Your mind is playing tricks on you, creating these limiting beliefs and excuses and keeping you stuck. You can get in incredible shape with pushups, sit ups, mountain climbers, jumping jacks, planks, and a bunch of other exercises that require no equipment and no need to even leave your room.

 

Edited December 30, 2023 by Phil King

[eos_nyxia]

2 hours ago, Sabth said:

A treadmill is expensive. 

Is there anything physical that you enjoy doing which is also low-cost?  (There are about a billion free workout videos of all sorts on Youtube, whether it's dance, yoga, pilates, calisthenics, hiit, etc.)

I think someone else also mentioned walking. Do you live in a walkable area or near parks? Can you walk to do errands? (Because you do have errands to do, I assume?)

All the physical stuff counts, not just the "on purpose" exercise. Likely throughout human history, we did not get most of our physical exercise through leisure physical activities, but through stuff we "had" to do, whether it was hunting, travelling on foot and on horseback, farming, fighting wars, doing domestic labour without modern appliances, etc. Human beings aren't really built to be sedentary and for this to make us as happy and healthy. The body NEEDS movement and challenge, not just for our long-term physical health, but for our mental and emotional health too. (Unless you are seriously ill and need to conserve energy, then what you actually need is proper rest.)

It's natural enough to gravitate towards physical movement that you enjoy doing and to keep doing that, rather than arbitrarily forcing discipline on yourself and expecting it to stick.
 

Quote

I'm just afraid that I will grow old without doing anything. And having a weaker body as I get older. No longer suitable for physical activities. 

I have already regretted not skating much more when I was younger. (And not travelling more) Now I'm getting older.

Though you may just have to "force" yourself to start one way or another, especially if nothing else works. Or tell yourself something like: I'll do this activity for a few minutes, if I don't like it, I'll stop. Then do this the next day, and then the day after, and on and on. Often the biggest challenge is just getting yourself started, and then everything gets easier from there. Do this long enough, and then BAM! You have a habit now.

Unfortunately, the more you think and feel this way, the more you get more of the same. I've been in a sort of slump like this too for multiple points in my life. Lethargy extends to everything: physically, emotionally, mentally, energetically and spiritually. It doesn't get better by waiting for the perfect conditions to start doing the thing.

Quote

All these comments aren't helping me. 

What kind of comments are you looking for?

Quote

No. I used to be good in school and university (above average) but I'm not really good socially. 

I'm just taking a guess: do you find it difficult to function because you're not in a system like school/ university which forces you to manage your motivation because of external expectations? (e.g. deadlines, grades, teacher praise/ disapproval.) Is this something that you got used to having your whole life, this sense of external structure and security to regulate yourself?

Edited December 30, 2023 by eos_nyxia

[Buck Edwards]

First you gotta build motivation. 

 

[Sabth]

People will look at me weirdly if i walk in this neighborhood. Its not something that people do. i only walk/jog twice in this neighbourhood years ago. a park is faraway. There is no place for me to skate . A stadium is also faraway. its not in a walking distance. Only by car.

Over a decade ago, i live in a house that has a plenty of space to skate and a swimming pool and a gym too. That was the last time that i skate everyday after school. But after we move houses, i no longer had a place to skate. And then we move house again. This place are no better. i dont know. 

 

[Thought Art]

@Sabth Why would you walking in the neighbour be weird to neighbours? Curious 

[Thought Art]

You can workout for free. No more excuses!

[Sabth]

5 hours ago, Thought Art said:

@Sabth Why would you walking in the neighbour be weird to neighbours? Curious 

Idk people just do. Maybe because I'm a girl or because this neighbourhood there is no people walking by so I am the only person walking early morning while people going to work (leaving their houses) . Maybe it's weird for me to walk by the roadside. I do this often in other places that aren't mine. But to do it in my place is a little weird. 

[TheCloud]

@Sabth You describe yourself as not being good socially.  How bad are you?  Do you have friends?  Close friends?  Does anybody know you?  I don't know you and have never met you, but I get the impression that it's been a long time since you've tried to look anyone in the eye and get close to them.  How close to the mark am I?

[Sabth]

2 hours ago, TheCloud said:

@Sabth You describe yourself as not being good socially.  How bad are you?  Do you have friends?  Close friends?  Does anybody know you?  I don't know you and have never met you, but I get the impression that it's been a long time since you've tried to look anyone in the eye and get close to them.  How close to the mark am I?

I only talk to my family member as for now. I could fake it very well if my life hangs on it. The last time that I socialize with strangers is when I was in the mental hospital last year. I hate that hospital so much, but for survival purposes I thought that I should be kind. It kinda reminds me of a few years back. It's how I treated everyone in my university. I became extroverted and charming. I guess. But...                                  It's a front. I am not usually like that. The way I treated the doctors and the nurses and others. Idk. I even think that the doctor likes me as he was flustered when he first saw me. There was a three young doctors two girls and 1 guy. Both are like students that's just graduated I think. So it felt like my friends from university from years ago. I don't want them to think me crazy so I do compromise. Sometimes I wonder if I should just kept my mouth shut and treat them like enemies. Cuz they then described me as having a schizophrenia. Lol. It was a lie. I told them that I hate the speaker from the mosque next to my house and they said I heard voices in my head. I never heard voices in my head. I'm not schizophrenic. But these people diagnosed me being schizophrenic. If I don't tell you anything then you'll be shit nothing. I don't need these doctors. It's a shit situation. And they write everything's that s ever come out of my mouth. They seems very amateur. I hate it. I even thought that they are too young to be a doctor. 

But well I'm not complaining. They are evil. These are the kind of people who would tied others to their bed. And threaten. And force others. I think a hospital is a terrible place and it shouldn't exist. It was just fucked up. I didn't do any wrong . In fact, my things are stolen at home when I was forced into the hospital. It's really fucked up. They hv been wanting to get into my wealth for long I guess. It's soo fucked up. And they do me ect. I just think that my whole body are fucked up now and never be the same. I am always on alert mode to my surrounding I never lose my consciousness ever. But they made me lose my consciousness 6/8 times in two weeks. And they want me to clear my memories. I didn't want it. It was done without my will. I hate them so much.  I am already spoilt and ruined. I hate my life. I am no longer the same. I had been touched by a lot of people. Disgusting. 

[TheCloud]

6 hours ago, Sabth said:

I am already spoilt and ruined. I hate my life. I am no longer the same. I had been touched by a lot of people. Disgusting. 

If you met someone who went through what you've gone through, who was looking for hope and trying to make things better, would you say those same things to them;  that they are spoilt and ruined?  Would you tell them that they'll never be the same?

[Sabth]

[

Success. I only want success now. I dreamed of my bully today. I don't know why. It has been such a long time. But we're given a task and we all got competitive. And there was a person who are higher than me in age (but we're given the same task). We do it in groups. Idk. I just don't feel good about it. She's my sister's friend. My sister is 3years older than me she was a master student and she had worked. Way more experienced than me. There's no way I would win this. And in that dream she was paying close attention to me. So that I wouldn't go higher than her. This dream is just not so good feeling. 

I was walking in a carpark. There was a lift. In the middle of the night. There was other students as well. We all wanted to go to level 3. Idk.  Idk what is wrong with this dream. I dreamed of my school which is both christian and Muslims. And when we ate together, I ended up getting the smallest plate so it was hard to eat. Before that I fight with my sister's friend (yes that same person) for space. Idk why I got all these dreams. She do talk about me to her friends. I don't feel safe when my existence is known. We went to the same university but take different courses and I was undergraduate while they're being postgraduate. I don't end up graduating while they all graduate (like everyone else would)I got distracted a lot. In fact my sister even asked me to sent her assignment to her lecturers a lot. that I went to meet her lecturers. I don't know. I've run errands some time. I took her graduation outfit. And bought it all the way home. When I was more of an adult, I guess it was all wrong. She should have done it herself. Anyway with this guy who is my bully, idk what he wants or what he's up to. or what he didn't want me to achieve /to be. We're still not friend in that dream. It seems like he was scared of something. And then I saw many people who do cool arts. (The task).

]

[jimwell]

19 hours ago, Sabth said:

I only talk to my family member as for now. I could fake it very well if my life hangs on it. The last time that I socialize with strangers is when I was in the mental hospital last year. I hate that hospital so much, but for survival purposes I thought that I should be kind. It kinda reminds me of a few years back. It's how I treated everyone in my university. I became extroverted and charming. I guess. But...                                  It's a front. I am not usually like that. The way I treated the doctors and the nurses and others. Idk. I even think that the doctor likes me as he was flustered when he first saw me. There was a three young doctors two girls and 1 guy. Both are like students that's just graduated I think. So it felt like my friends from university from years ago. I don't want them to think me crazy so I do compromise. Sometimes I wonder if I should just kept my mouth shut and treat them like enemies. Cuz they then described me as having a schizophrenia. Lol. It was a lie. I told them that I hate the speaker from the mosque next to my house and they said I heard voices in my head. I never heard voices in my head. I'm not schizophrenic. But these people diagnosed me being schizophrenic. If I don't tell you anything then you'll be shit nothing. I don't need these doctors. It's a shit situation. And they write everything's that s ever come out of my mouth. They seems very amateur. I hate it. I even thought that they are too young to be a doctor. 

But well I'm not complaining. They are evil. These are the kind of people who would tied others to their bed. And threaten. And force others. I think a hospital is a terrible place and it shouldn't exist. It was just fucked up. I didn't do any wrong . In fact, my things are stolen at home when I was forced into the hospital. It's really fucked up. They hv been wanting to get into my wealth for long I guess. It's soo fucked up. And they do me ect. I just think that my whole body are fucked up now and never be the same. I am always on alert mode to my surrounding I never lose my consciousness ever. But they made me lose my consciousness 6/8 times in two weeks. And they want me to clear my memories. I didn't want it. It was done without my will. I hate them so much.  I am already spoilt and ruined. I hate my life. I am no longer the same. I had been touched by a lot of people. Disgusting. 

Could any moderator check whether Sabth is another account of @Preety_India?

[TheCloud]

2 hours ago, Sabth said:

[

Success. I only want success now. I dreamed of my bully today. I don't know why. It has been such a long time. But we're given a task and we all got competitive. And there was a person who are higher than me in age (but we're given the same task). We do it in groups. Idk. I just don't feel good about it. She's my sister's friend. My sister is 3years older than me she was a master student and she had worked. Way more experienced than me. There's no way I would win this. And in that dream she was paying close attention to me. So that I wouldn't go higher than her. This dream is just not so good feeling. 

I was walking in a carpark. There was a lift. In the middle of the night. There was other students as well. We all wanted to go to level 3. Idk.  Idk what is wrong with this dream. I dreamed of my school which is both christian and Muslims. And when we ate together, I ended up getting the smallest plate so it was hard to eat. Before that I fight with my sister's friend (yes that same person) for space. Idk why I got all these dreams. She do talk about me to her friends. I don't feel safe when my existence is known. We went to the same university but take different courses and I was undergraduate while they're being postgraduate. I don't end up graduating while they all graduate (like everyone else would)I got distracted a lot. In fact my sister even asked me to sent her assignment to her lecturers a lot. that I went to meet her lecturers. I don't know. I've run errands some time. I took her graduation outfit. And bought it all the way home. When I was more of an adult, I guess it was all wrong. She should have done it herself. Anyway with this guy who is my bully, idk what he wants or what he's up to. or what he didn't want me to achieve /to be. We're still not friend in that dream. It seems like he was scared of something. And then I saw many people who do cool arts. (The task).

]

To me it sounds as if you wish you could be the winner, so of course you hate it when you lose an unfair competition.

[Bando]

@jimwell What happened to her? Was she banned

[Rafael Thundercat]

so go to rest a bit

[Sabth]

. 

 

7 hours ago, jimwell said:

Could any moderator check whether Sabth is another account of @Preety_India?

I AM NOT ! I AM S.A.B.T.H.  that's my real name. 

 

6 hours ago, TheCloud said:

To me it sounds as if you wish you could be the winner, so of course you hate it when you lose an unfair competition.

I am just writing my dream mindlessly. As a record. Don't mind me. 

4 hours ago, Rafael Thundercat said:

so go to rest a bit

🙂

Edited January 7 by Sabth

[Epikur]

On 30.12.2023 at 7:38 AM, Sabth said:

I only wanna do long run and jog. These are the only things that I feel like makes a difference. 

Your feelings are wrong. I loved running. Then I had problems with my knees. I learned to concentrate on other exercises specially walking. Now I don't care about running.

Btw one can run in one's room too.

 

[jimwell]

22 hours ago, Bando said:

@jimwell What happened to her? Was she banned

Yes, and she had more than 10 accounts. I wonder whether Sabth is one of her active accounts. 

To all moderators: A user with a history of extreme drama and fakeness such as Preety is not worth my time, hence it's appropriate for you to answer my question. Why the silence?

 

19 hours ago, Sabth said:

I AM NOT ! I AM S.A.B.T.H.  that's my real name. 

I hope you're telling the truth. But a deceiver doesn't admit to their deception.

[Yimpa]

19 hours ago, Sabth said:

I am just writing my dream mindlessly. As a record. Don't mind me. 

And where is this dream journal located?