got kicked out of the mall again

[something_else]

6 hours ago, Emotionalmosquito said:

In another instance, I spam approach at a mall with no job or money.

Is one really going to make me that much more successful than the other if I’m still the exact same guy? Maybe it would but I find that hard accept.

Yes, because you automatically give off low status vibes when you spend all day doing nothing. You can't help it.

Being extremely sex-obsessed to the point where you sexualise everything is a low status indicator that women pick up on, for example.

 

[Mesopotamian]

@Majed I've lived in an Islamic country, and I had problems with girls since early ages. However, you do seem to live with a country where rules are strict and you can approach girls few hundreds times before being kicked out?

Here are some tips, you need to slow down, and because this urgency would definitely be giving you a "negative aura" that girls can notice really easily. 

Also, try to dive deep inside yourself, and study your emotions, and listen to Leo's episode "implicit vs explicit" 

Also try to approach it not from a mentality of an achiever, but just someone who's willing to have fun in life.. Girls like to have fun, and take their time, and somebody who wants to prove something or approaching it like it's a business, well that's instant put off

Fourth, to let go of achiever mentality, try to accept that you might never ever be with someone ever in your life and that you might die alone. The sooner you accept that, the sooner you can work on the above points.

Good luck!

[CARDOZZO]

You should not approach in just one place.

Make a list about your city: 10 top places/spots to train your daygame skills.

 

Edited December 19, 2023 by CARDOZZO

[Parallax Mind]

On 16/12/2023 at 1:42 PM, Majed said:

some months ago, i got kicked out of a mall, i waited some months then came back a few times then got kicked out again. i went to another mall gamed there for a few months then got told by the responsible of the mall that approaching girls in the mall is not allowed because they get bothered, and that i shouldn't do it again, i said sure and went home. 

now i have ocd. that i started taking the medication for recently, so it's not fully cured, so maybe that is making me harder to game. 

now i have 3 options: the first one is probably the most likely which is to wait until my mental health is fully recovered since i think that's kind of the main reason why my approaches are not as high quality as they should be. and then come back. the thing with getting kicked out of malls is that i do hundreds of approaches before getting kicked out, so in my mind it's confusing because it clearly is stupidity that i've already approached thousands of girls, fine, but then get kicked out for approaching girls. it's like getting kicked out for drinking water, it's non sensical. 

the second option is to focus on night game: bars and clubs: there are dozens of bars and clubs that i can go to to meet women, the downside is that it requires money, and since i have my mental health issues, i'm handicaped and can't work on my finances, or find a job to make money, but again my mental health problems will probably get solved in a few months. again because of my mental health issues i couldn't make money, and was stuck not getting laid with pick up since my logistics were horrible : no phone, no money for clubs or bars, no money for hotel rooms...

the third option might be to become a bartender: like that i fix my money, and my getting laid problem at the same time, leo said in his series that becoming a bartender can help you get laid. (btw i need more theory and knowledge on how getting laid as a bartender works, because i won't approaching girls compulsively like in pick up so i might not know how it works when you're a bartender, should you just flirt when there are women around, and ask for their numbers for example or should you do other things too i don't know) 

fourth option might be using tinder and dating app, i used it once very briefly, and got a match easily, i am very good looking. 

fifth option might be to buy prostitutes. 

In your other post you said you were gay? 

[Majed]

@Parallax Mind it's fluid 

[Emotionalmosquito]

20 hours ago, something_else said:

Yes, because you automatically give off low status vibes when you spend all day doing nothing. You can't help it.

So this sounds like more of a confidence issue than an unemployment issue. If I can’t help but give off low status vibes (because I feel guilty about not working?) with some confidence hacks and a little charisma boost and I should be A okay. Unless it has more to do with the not having money part.

I would argue that a dickhead boss or a bully coworker or two would poison my vibes exponentially more than just not having a job. To be fair I’m not saying a job wouldn’t help at all, it probably would. But if there’s any conceivable way I could possibly get good at girls without one, that’s my goal. 

 

21 hours ago, Majed said:

you're horny go talk to girls, i've done it thousands of times. girls are humans you know, they understand that you're attracted to them and want to talk to them. it's no big deal

I know they technically are human, with their own minds and feelings and desires and such. It all too often doesn’t seem like they are though. I think you either feel the same or know lots of guys feel that way. Otherwise you wouldn’t have stated the fact that they’re human beings. The way they are upon being approached by guys they don’t know can really be disappointing. For example, and I have plenty of my own examples, I just watched a tiktok about a girl telling how her boyfriend before he met her, did cold approach. (how he met her) Most of the girls he would open would either look at him with a blank face and walk away or give him terrible resting bitch face and cold, one worded answers to his conversation starters. Her boyfriend’s explanation of how difficult it is for men to talk to women because of their guarded, unwelcoming demeanor blew her mind.

 

21 hours ago, Majed said:

Go out and talk to girls and you'll see girls will get attracted to you and will want to hook up with you. 

I’ve done a sizable chunk of socializing and cold approach. Never got that part. So I guess all I can do is more grinding to hopefully get some better results. 

To anyone reading this: Go read the two pink images I uploaded in this thread. It’s a lengthy report but well worth the time.

[Majed]

@Emotionalmosquito the bottom line is whether women respond positively or negatively to your approaches depend on the quality of your approaches. You're not entitled to a good reaction. To have a good reaction you have to make the girl feel good, which takes practice and experience.

[Emotionalmosquito]

18 hours ago, Majed said:

whether women respond positively or negatively to your approaches depend on the quality of your approaches.

It partially depends on that, not entirely. It also depends on other factors like the mood she’s in, what type of person she is, whether or not she’s menstruating, those are the main ones I think. So it’s irrational to just automatically take full blame when a girl acts like a drama queen about being approached.

18 hours ago, Majed said:

You're not entitled to a good reaction

That’s fine. But they’re not entitled to irrationally freak out over being approached by guys they perceive as less than the perfect chad. I mean these women got you kicked out of one of your big pickup hotspots over nothing more than not liking you or being offended that you thought you were good enough to talk to them. That’s more entitlement than anything else. You should be furious out of your mind over this. I mean, I’m sure you’re not actually being creepy, right? So what’s their fucking issue?

[Majed]

@Emotionalmosquito look buddy, you need to love women, you complain a lot, and there are partial truths in what you say, however don't fool yourself into thinking that it's impossible to have a great dating/sex life.

[Emotionalmosquito]

4 hours ago, Majed said:

you need to love women

 

[Emotionalmosquito]

@Majed Or what if it’s the opposite problem? What if I already love women far too much for my own good? Maybe I have such a vast undying love for them it hurts unbearably bad to go out and see firsthand how they actually are and the extent to which that love is not reciprocated 

[Majed]

@Emotionalmosquito You have a bunch of limiting beliefs. Start visualizing yourself as the attractive playboy who hit on all the girls. 

[LordFall]

Do you game by yourself or with wings? Having wings is good for malls and other environments like campuses where you can't afford to be too uncalibrated. Have someone give you feedback on your approaches and game to see if it's too polarizing for the environment. You should be able to do sets in a mall and have girls almost have a very bad reaction and have the verbal skills to get rid of tension or awkwardness that manifests. 

Also when security comes up to you do you try to convince them that it's your right to approach girls and they don't usually mind or do you make an excuse and walk away? I've had it happen I just told them I thought the girl was a friend and apologized and it was never an issue. You shouldn't admit to them that you're approaching a lot of girls at the mall, of course it will be their job to stop you then.