2 lessons I learnt from Jada Smith (I was embarrassed, and it hurt). PART I

[koops]

I always talk about how toxic social media is.

-Isolates people

-Brings hostility & quick judgements

-Fills us with hate

-Promotes superficiality. Robs us opportunities for depth.

-Infect us with groupthink.

-It multiplies the levels of judgement.

 

And judgement is a disease that isolate us.

So, as I’m now working on reducing judgement, I created this 3-PART RULE for reducing judgement:

 

Here it is:

I won’t judge anyone unless:

-I met this person live. Face to face.

-I spent at least 30 minutes talking to him.

-I know basic stuff about his childhood, teen years, and relationships with his parents.

 

And also try to remember Great Gatsby’s opening paragraph:

In my younger and more vulnerable years my father gave me some advice that I've been turning over in my mind ever since. 

"Whenever you feel like criticizing any one," he told me,

"just remember that all the people in this world haven't had the advantages that you've had."

 

Think of Jada. So easy to judge.

-30 second clips.

-140 word tweets.

-Some funny memes.

But understand the hell she’s been through.

Starting in his childhood, teens, and now.

Understand her context.

It hit me in this podcast I stumble across: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vwFxptz77II

 

And this is not about Jada.

Extrapolate this to anyone you judge.

 

We judge because we want to feel superior.

We judge because we want that cheap dopamine spike.

We need to stop.

I need to stop. My friends and I were judging her, Will and the whole situation a few months back.

Without knowing any context. Reacting to media.

Thats just stupid behavior.

 

That's the first lesson I learnt.

Reduce judgement remembering the Gatsby quote, and this 3 part rule.

 

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Here I post about the 2nd lesson (deep):

 

 

Edited November 13, 2023 by koops

[An young being]

23 minutes ago, koops said:

I won’t judge anyone unless:

 

-I met this person live. Face to face.

 

-I spent at least 30 minutes talking to him.

 

-I know basic stuff about his childhood, teen years, and relationships with his parents.

These are great tips, especially during these social media days, but at the end, we should all strive towards not judging anyone, even after meeting certain criteria that we find to be satisfying.

[Thought Art]

It’s really hard to judge others because we experience so little if them as well. 
 

We are also apes. I think it’s more than just social media humans have behaved like this for a long time. This is how we use social media.

Ideally we try to understand others… but, humans judge and they aren’t going to stop. You must grow a thick skin. 

[halfknots]

What happens if the 3 criteria are met? You then are "allowed" to pass judgement on others? I'm confused by this. Why is this system preferable to simply letting go of judgement?

[not-a-faerie]

I am the judge of the universe. Every thought I have is correct. Anyone else is a fool. 

[petar8p]

On 13. 11. 2023. at 5:33 PM, koops said:

I know basic stuff about his childhood, teen years, and relationships with his parents.

That is the best thing ever