I Used To Love Someone For 6 Years, Now I Have To Forget Her

[Hallo_Leo]

How can i forget about someone that i used to love for 6 years?
Everyday i remember her  she is like my god, i will do everywhat she want from me, but she don't care and she did not care in the past. ... 

[Evilwave Heddy]

Ah good luck with that.  From personal experience it's gonna take some time. FeelsBadman

First off:  Try to realize that there are plenty of other girls just like her (even better than her) out there waiting for you. (I'm not just saying this to make you feel better) And remember that when you eventually do start seeing other girls this chick won't even cross your mind.  So you'd be better off starting early to ease the pain.

Secondly: You must remove everything associated with her.  This also means removing her from Facebook if you have her added on it. You need to pretend like she doesn't exist anymore.

Thirdly:  Every time she does manage to pop into your mind, try your best to move your mind to something else, like reading a book or getting lost in a good video/movie.

 

I'm sure there are plenty more techniques out there to forget about her that I didn't mention and I wish you the best.

Edited April 1, 2017 by Evilwave Heddy

[Hallo_Leo]

All these was long-distance relationship, and she didn't want me in a strategic sight, eveytime i had left her, she came back and bring me back to the worse situation, now i'm scared to get out from this situation, and i'm scared to be in these situation, i'm very scared Because i think may no one could understand me, and more ....

[Shin]

Love has nothing to do with sadness, attachement does:

 

 

Edited April 1, 2017 by Shin

[Magic]

From my personal experience, I can tell you one thing that really works, even if it seems brutal or whatsoever low:

1. Start meeting new girls.

I bet you're not feeling like meeting anyone new and you just want her because she was so perfect and all that stuff. I know this state. This is your ego wanting you to suffer, give it the finger. Force yourself to spend nice time with other girls and avoid thinking of the ex - remove everything from your surroundings that reminds you of her. After short time you won't have to force yourself anymore.

Also, don't look into the pain. Grief-counselling and introspection has been proven to actually worsen the grief in most cases. Stiff-upper-lip attitude works much better, don't underestimate your innate emotional resiliency.

I've just recently been through a break-up and I was researching the topic for a month or so, trying out multiple pieces of advice from various sources. This is the one thing that really worked.

 

[egoeimai]

If you care enough about how you feel;you will release the bad emotions,bring something new in,and live your life happily. Its a discipline you have to have about feeling good. Each moment counts. You need relief. Everybody does. Each moment.

[Guest Annetta]

@My_Name_Is_Mud This person isn't me.  You're gaslighting
Cut it out.

[abgespaced]

@Hallo_Leo

Do you love yourself?

[Shin]

Seriously, better yourself up to attract any girl you want, otherwise you'll always be crippled in your life, you'll always have problem at some point to talk to attractive girls.

I'm serious, because unless you're enlightened as fuck, not being confident with women will ALWAYS fucks you in the end, always.

 

[Tuomas]

Many years ago, I was in love with a girl for almost four years. We were together for three and then she dumped me. Things take time and not being in contact with her results in it taking a shorter time. The one thing that finally helped me stop loving her was to logically realize why she left me and why it was for the best of both. Just my two cents. All tips i read above seemed more or less effective as well but i don´t think you should even think about meeting someone new before you have at least partially healed from the last one and left it behind. Otherwise you will just be trying to fill a already full cup.

[Lai]

On 4/2/2017 at 11:29 PM, Shin said:

 

 

This is so interesting... and so true!  Guys, learn from this video!

Handsome guys who have nothing interesting to say, don't get my dopamine and oxytocin going.  As you get older (like me), the well-groomed boys with sixpacks are just a form of entertainment for us women.  It's what's inside you that turns us on!

[Shin]

If you really want to be successful with women, just don't have time for them, and be genuinely not interested to be in a relationship for the sake of being in a relationship.

That means working on yourself, working on your life purpose, studying whatever materials you find interesting, having daily habits that already take a chunks of your time (workout/meditation/reading/nature comtemplation).

If you're a guy like me who didn't have too many relationships and still is kinda a newbie into dating and women interaction, this is one way to do it, because the women you'll meet will have at least some sort of common interest with you, it will be easier to be natural and authentic around them (and getting confidence when you'll see they are interested in you for being who you really are).

For example, aikido class (or any other physical activity), self-improvement (at events and meetup concerning this), spirituality (retreats or weekly meetup at some zen dojo), yoga, and so on (whatever you're interested in).

The other way would be too heavily study pick up (which you have to do anyway because it's interesting), and practice the hell out of it on tons of girls. The drawback of this is that you'll waste a lot of time building confidence around women and relationships in fake ways that doesn't really suit your personality, and ultimately, you'll understand that it's just a game and that relationship can't fulfill you anyway.
If you're extremely shy and anxious around women, to the point where you can't even talk to them, I would suggest to do this though (just don't be an ass and make them believe you want a relationship, when you just want to fuck them).

What you want to do, is to focus on you first, everything else is secondary really, it's all about your inner world and how you discover it and fight your inner demons. Confidence and detachement will come easily once you've killed some of them, and you might never want to be in a relationship when you'll find your life purpose.
It would be cool, as a side and fun hobby, but as a man, relationship are not that important, it's at best a nice bonus, at worst a distraction that will fuck up your potential and probably decades of your life.

It's kind of counter-intuitive, but when you'll find the right person, this person will be there because you really both wanted to be in each other lives, and not because one of you was needy.
You'll see in each others the potential to grow together, to help each other to get to a higher state of consciousness, in harmony (but it will be challenging), which is really what relationships is all about, it's not about love and security, or even intimacy (even though it's really nice).

No, what you want out of a potential mate is a partner, someone that you know will be able to boost your will to not procrastinate.
Some sort of sacred union between two souls, overlapping into one, to fuck the world together.

Edited April 16, 2017 by Shin

[Tibor]

I got out of it after a year of self pitty and self blame by realizing that nobody is more important than my health and in a sense my life.

And by hurting myself so much, felt like i was punishing myself for failing, that i wouldnt think of to do that to an other.

Its the sentence "dont do to an other what you dont wanna have done to you" but in this case its reversed.

It was instandly gone i stil felt for her but i was now as a sister. Al that that time we saw each other ones in  while (still hope)

After the feeling changed we saw each other a lot and had a lot of fun we became closer friends the we were when lovers.

But after 3/4 mounths it slowly died out. This was her choice.

I know now why.

When i was in so much hurt she to was still connected with me. Guess it gave her unconsiously a feeling of power and satisfaction because the breakup was my fault in her eyes.

When i healed the connection was gone but she didnt know that. She slowly has felt intuitive over those 3/4 mouths that something was changed.

 Her blame was gone and resentment.

She pickup her life again.

As I did.