Awkwardness and desire which is the root of suffering

[StarStruck]

If you want something too much you come off as Gollum from LOTR. Nobody wants something like Gollum wants his ring. In social situations it is exactly the same. If you want too much of that love, appreciation, acceptance, sex or something else from the other you come across like Gollum.

I came after this realization after coming across multiple women who were desiring me and me not desiring them. It is so creepy. They look at you like Gollum would look at his ring. I’m not even that attractive but I’m starting to get my shit together so I guess I’m ok. Guys aren’t valued by appearance anyway which is different for girls. I can’t imagine being a hot 20 year old girl being lusted over all the time. Those girls just want a guy who doesn’t treat them like Gollum would treat his ring. 

Desire is the root of all evil. You have to let go of the thing you want and just internalize what you project onto that thing. This also counts for money. You need to internalize what you project into money and you will attract it. 

The deepest insight I got yesterday is that in the deepest of our heart we desire god which is the true beloved. All other things we desire is just a reflection. It is praising false gods. We need to desire god which is true fulfillment. Wealth, health, and relationships are fun too but they are empty in spirit without our true beloved. 

Edited November 5, 2023 by StarStruck

[SeaMonster]

3 hours ago, StarStruck said:

Desire is the root of all evil.

It's not desire per se.  It's desire combined with low self-esteem adding upto desperation.  Desire is fine. Desperation is different. A person who feels he has options can desire but not be driven by it or helpless in the face of it.

Edited November 5, 2023 by SeaMonster

[Raze]

The issue is neediness, projecting intense desire at a woman can actually turn her on.

[Princess Arabia]

You seem to be hearing some teachings, or whatever you call it, and internalizing it but interpretting them through your own filters. Desire isn't the root of all evil. There isn't even anything evil. God is everything so you're calling God evil.

You are right when you say all we're seeking is God but we are already God so no need to desire God. We're just here to experience the part of God that we desire to experience. That part of Infinity. When it becomes corrupted is when we have a separate sense of self and those desires are coming from a place of non-fulfillment and now we feel the need to lie, cheat, steal and manipulate our way into getting our desires. 

You are wealth, you are health, you are love, you just have to drop all other false notions of what you think you are and become those things in the mind. You are already that which you seek. The world is a reflection of you, not your desires. You are already all that is, but in order for you to experience yourself it has to become manifested in the physical realm. That is what creation is. Your desires are God's desires because you are God.

Edited November 6, 2023 by Princess Arabia

[StarStruck]

@Princess Arabia I got it from Buddhism. But even Buddhism says desire should be transmuted. It is not evil in the classical sense. If desire is not transmuted it becomes a menace because you project it onto the world.  Not all desires are equal. We have high and low desires. Desire for the Self is something that shouldn’t be suppressed but actively flamed. Last week I got an insight that I was just stuck in my head, my mind is a prison and there is a huge god head outside of me. It was truly scary. Desiring to become that doesn’t come natural. 

Edited November 6, 2023 by StarStruck

[Schizophonia]

I potentially become neddy precisely if I want something for which I don't have much desire, for reasons of ego, fear...
If I really vibe with a woman because I like her energy, her body, etc. then excitement will naturally be present and I will naturally be more "alpha".

I also noticed that the more devoted I was to a job in everyday life, the more I became sexually dominant and fantasized about high-value women.

And obviously today's men lack dopamine, because of the sources of entertainment available and fap, low levels and resistance to androgens because of xenoestrogens, prolactin too high because of exorphins...

Edited November 6, 2023 by Schizophonia

[gettoefl]

desiring and deserving go hand in hand, the calculus is my desiring you and your deserving me have to be equal else no can do