Do women lack empathy for men?

[NoSelfSelf]

@Reignforest What defensive ?

Being a man is connection of your own mindset with your behaviour...

Not outside mindset with your feelings then behaviour which is cause of all this problems...

[Pav]

1 hour ago, Reignforest said:

@universe so when I slipped a disc in my spine,  could barely move without excruciating pain.  I should just man up and do her honey do list without complaint?

That sounds horrible, I couldn't imagine being with someone so unsupportive. 

[Reignforest]

@NoSelfSelf exactly,  there is no defensive in that situation. But what I mean is that I can't take it seriously unless I'm all in. No half measures. And we are not at that point. We are slowly growing together and much has improved since when we started,  but we still have a long way to go.

 

Also I am in connection with my own mindset. I built my own business in spite of her doubt and lack of support. Since then we have all benefited from it. I also built a 5 acre homestead with chickens,  turkeys, sheep and an orchard without help and against her wishes. But now she's happy about it. 

I'm mostly curious why females can't understand the male perspective, while constantly accusing males of not seeing the females perspective. When this is obviously not the case

 

 

[Reignforest]

@Pav that is a typical modern relationship. I don't know of any relationship with a more supportive partner personally. 

[Reignforest]

1 hour ago, NoSelfSelf said:

Since you are from single mother and didnt have a fatherfigure then you screwed...

 

My mother is one of the nicest people you'll ever meet, also very responsible. However she's not perfect and was only capable of offering advice in transactional relationships bc that's all she knew.

My father went to prison for making meth. The only advice he had was how to steal, lie, kill and destroy. I'm glad he wasn't around honestly now that I know him.

Fortunately I did have good grandfather's to emulate. Unfortunately they died young and put up with more than their fair share of bs. Nobody is perfect,  I just try to absorb what I admire and disregard the rest.

[Reignforest]

@Raze I like David Tien. I'm going to subscribe to his channel. I will listen to the other audio book during work.

[itsadistraction]

5 hours ago, Reignforest said:

Disclaimer: this is not a post to bash women but to gain understanding. I love women, I was raised by a single mother and have 4 daughters. 

So I say this bc I've noticed a pattern that the women I know seem to lack empathy for the men in their lives. This applies to family, friends and co workers. A personal example would be when I'm injured or sick I notice that my wife will get visibly upset bc she has to do more work. This could be after getting a tooth removed, a slipped disc in spine, or positive could test. Even with undeniable proof she'll act like I'm faking it. And shell still expect me to run errands, do chores or anything I normally do. Whereas if she's slightly sick I'll cater to every need even more so than normal. 

I recently saw a video that suggested that women behave this way intentionally to test their man's strength. Another example would be if she asks me if I want to get chocolate or Chinese food. Knowing full well that I don't, but she won't just say that she wants those things. Again I'm not alone, I've noticed the same pattern in coworkers, family and  friends. In fact when I try to mention selfish behavior to my own mother she wil defend my wife. As though I'm expected to do all the work and make all the money. It's almost as though it's an unspoken universal truth that men have no value unless they are actively working.

 

Yes evolution may have driven women to be attracted to men who work. Also women are shaped by men's sexual choices in the past. So maybe our ancestors picked women who got angry at us for not working. 

Also consider that there are as many different types of women as there are men. There are lazy slobs who don't give a shit if you work or not. There are cool hippy surfer chicks who just want to have a good time and also don't care how much money you make. 

[Jacob Morres]

Depends on the woman. Some will care some won't 

Really depends on their own maturity 

 

The example you're bringing up, sounds crazy. No empathy when you're physically sick is actually kinda crazy. I'm pretty sure even the average woman empathizes with that

I def would try to communicate with her about it. Some people when communicated to about their behavior will change through awareness, even if initially toxic. But the communication needs to be skillfull

Edited October 6, 2023 by Jacob Morres

[EdgeGod900]

Can you tell if she means it or not? I can be very perceptive at times, and can therefore tell if a woman is acting like that to be playful. Either way they still have empathy for men, you just gotta know how to bring that to the forefront. And theres so many fun ways to make them show their empathy for you(I ain't telling you how tho  )

 

 

There is this woman who I was flirting with, but she wouldn't fucking take her mask off. We had so many intense flirtatious moments until she eventually removed her mask... and to my suprise, her lower face looked like an opened cash register. Now thats lack of empathy right there. Made me invest that much time and energy on her, knowing damn well  I wouldn't be attracted to her hideous underbite.

Edited October 6, 2023 by EdgeGod900

[NoSelfSelf]

@Reignforest How are you connected with your mindset when you want to be understood doesnt work like that...

Nice how you built things around the house you should built the experiences with her then her emotions will be satisfied so she will probably want to be curious about what you doing...

[Spiral]

I speculate that it’s related to attraction. If they are into to you they care about you. Most women isn’t into most men so it feels like they are not empathetic.

[Schizophonia]

I never understood how men could get into a relationship with a disrespectful woman, Or simply a girl not very invested, what’s the point?

I want to be in a relationship to receive love, tenderness, attention, validation, sharing… Otherwise it is completely useless. Might as well go to the whores.

 

Edited October 6, 2023 by Schizophonia

[Consept]

Yeah @Reignforest I think there's a lack of empathy and there's just disrespectful and how you described your situation it sounds like the latter. 

Have you talked to her about this, set your boundaries etc?

[pablo_aka_god]

it's easier to show empathy to individuals we perceive as weaker(like women or kids, not sure about elderly maybe weaker + potential value increases empathy?) or we want to fuck. 

[pablo_aka_god]

Still I haven't seen any big patterns about this, I think the people on your personal circle lack empathy

Edited October 6, 2023 by pablo_aka_god

[Pav]

17 hours ago, NoSelfSelf said:

@Reignforest How are you connected with your mindset when you want to be understood doesnt work like that...

Nice how you built things around the house you should built the experiences with her then her emotions will be satisfied so she will probably want to be curious about what you doing...

Sounds a bit like you're gass lighting here. If what he's saying is true then it seems that there is a genuine concern about his wife's personally or attitude towards him, rather than him just failing to emotionally satisfy her.

17 hours ago, Spiral said:

I speculate that it’s related to attraction. If they are into to you they care about you. Most women isn’t into most men so it feels like they are not empathetic.

I suspect that this is the case. I am honestly disgusted sometimes by the way some women treat men who are unattractive.

[Merkabah Star]

On 6/10/2023 at 4:36 AM, Reignforest said:

A personal example would be when I'm injured or sick I notice that my wife will get visibly upset bc she has to do more work. This could be after getting a tooth removed, a slipped disc in spine, or positive could test. Even with undeniable proof she'll act like I'm faking it. And shell still expect me to run errands, do chores or anything I normally do. Whereas if she's slightly sick I'll cater to every need even more so than normal. 

 

Men do that too, it’s not a gender thing, it’s a personality type. Not a lot of empathy when you are sick falls into narcissistic tendencies. And yeah when they are sick you nurse them with such care and love and kindness, the next week you are sick and they learnt nothing from you. If you didn’t have kids I would say run. But you do, so you need to lower your expectations and just keep shining your caring light and self in the hope one day it will be noticed. ???

[Reignforest]

@Raze I read no more Mr. Nice guy. Wow that is a truly inspiring book. I'm going to buy it and practice immediately. There's so much profound content I'm literally flabbergasted. Thanks

[sholomar]

On 10/5/2023 at 3:24 PM, Reignforest said:

@universe so when I slipped a disc in my spine,  could barely move without excruciating pain.  I should just man up and do her honey do list without complaint?

Her biology was probably thinking "man I should have planted my seed in a man who doesn't get slipped spinal discs" ... there's a subconscious wiring within many females driven by genetics that most people don't want to accept. We have a lot of culturalized customs like monogamy that aren't really native to our genetic makeup. It's much more natural for females to want to be in a harem with a dominant male from a genetic perspective, or to have lots of male partners as a source of protection and resources. 

Women will literally sleep with the invading army. They will change loyalties to the strongest man in the group. Why? Because over the last 50,000+ years of evolution, the women that didn't do this, got killed. So the surviving women who went on to pass on their seed? The ones who knew how to be chameleons. And thus, the modern human species (with male and female nature being based on evolution and genetics) is born.

A lot of men have this "innocent princess" narrative programmed into them by society and that's how they think women are. That's not how women are. The realities of life as an animal species on a primitive planet are far more harsh and in your face. Romance is for men.

 

 

Bottom line, like someone earlier posted, most women aren't really into most men. They settled for what they could get. One way to know if she's really into you to be honest... she sucks and swallows.  Most relationships where the woman really has the "hots" for the man she's with don't really last though. That man tends to have lots of options, and will eventually exercise them. The men that make the best providers, are not the ones women get the "hots" for.  Genetics. Don't get mad at the bear for pooping in the woods. It's programmed to do that.  Better to hack the system by increasing your social status. Leo has videos on that...  "what women want in a man" , along with "why women fall for assholes" covers the basics.

Edited October 9, 2023 by sholomar

[StarStruck]

Listen to the profs