'Nice guys aren't actually nice' is a shit-test

[Consept]

You're projecting a lot. You see how you can't be authentic, that's what probably comes across to women from self-proclaimed nice guys, especially when they assert some kind of moral higher ground which is also what you've done in your posts. 

If your statement - 'Nice guys aren't actually nice' its a shit test. Was a shit test, you would've failed it by defending your nice guyness. 

If you want to truly get better with women and want advice or input from others here then start with being honest about where you are. Atm youre like the white belt trying to teach a class. 

[mr_engineer]

2 minutes ago, Consept said:

You're projecting a lot. You see how you can't be authentic, that's what probably comes across to women from self-proclaimed nice guys, especially when they assert some kind of moral higher ground which is also what you've done in your posts. 

I thought that if I assert a moral high ground when I say that I'm a nice guy, that would come across as authentic. But, I guess yall are hell-bent on proving that 'NO! You aren't nice! You can't be nice!!' 

4 minutes ago, Consept said:

If your statement - 'Nice guys aren't actually nice' its a shit test. Was a shit test, you would've failed it by defending your nice guyness. 

Oh, so when they attack your frame, instead of defending and reaffirming your frame, you let it collapse?! 

4 minutes ago, Consept said:

If you want to truly get better with women and want advice or input from others here then start with being honest about where you are. Atm youre like the white belt trying to teach a class. 

More like a kid sitting in a math class pointing out a major calculation mistake on the blackboard and not just drinking in wrong information. 

[Consept]

9 minutes ago, mr_engineer said:

More like a kid sitting in a math class pointing out a major calculation mistake on the blackboard and not just drinking in wrong information. 

More like the annoying kid that thinks he knows math better than anyone else despite not ever having completed an equation 

[mr_engineer]

15 minutes ago, Consept said:

More like the annoying kid that thinks he knows math better than anyone else despite not ever having completed an equation 

Well, the calculation-mistakes are right in front of you. If your solution is to discredit me instead of looking at your own logic, that's not intellectually honest. 

And, you don't know how many sexual partners I've had, how many 'equations' I've completed. I'm just choosing to not tell you that. Because I don't believe in dick-measuring. If that's what you're doing here, should I expect intellectual honesty from you?! 

Edited September 30, 2023 by mr_engineer

[Consept]

By my calculations 'nice guys' (this is distinct from guys that are genuinely nice) don't get many, if any, women interested in them romantically, authentic guys do. 

If you want to disprove this calculation as you are a self-proclaimed nice guy, you can state how many women you've had romantic relationships with. If you've had some then maybe your calculations could be considered, if you've had very few or as i suspect none at all them my original calculation works out in this case. 

[mr_engineer]

2 minutes ago, Consept said:

By my calculations 'nice guys' (this is distinct from guys that are genuinely nice) don't get many, if any, women interested in them romantically, authentic guys do. 

• So, 'authentic' is not 'nice'. Meaning, your definition of 'authentic', is being an asshole. It's just a matter of what type of asshole you are, right?! Right here, your opinion stops mattering to me, because I want a woman to love me, not just settle for me because she thinks she can manipulate me. 
• And, I'm not talking about 'romance' or 'sex'. I'm talking about 'love'. And, I've had a lot of women be loving towards me and be receptive to my love for them. And, I will not say anything about my sex-life out of respect for my partners. 

5 minutes ago, Consept said:

If you want to disprove this calculation as you are a self-proclaimed nice guy, you can state how many women you've had romantic relationships with. If you've had some then maybe your calculations could be considered, if you've had very few or as i suspect none at all them my original calculation works out in this case. 

Consider the possibility that I have bigger considerations than this petty dick-measuring game of yours, in which we tell each other how much sex we've had. I have nothing to prove to you. I just won't let you come to me and tell me that 'If you say you're a nice guy, you're not'. Just like I won't let you come in and tell me 'If you say you lift 40 pound dumb-bells, you're not doing that'. What you don't get to do is to call me a liar. 

[Butters]

 

 

[Consept]

4 minutes ago, mr_engineer said:

So, 'authentic' is not 'nice'. Meaning, your definition of 'authentic', is being an asshole. It's just a matter of what type of asshole you are, right?! Right here, your opinion stops mattering to me, because I want a woman to love me, not just settle for me because she thinks she can manipulate me. 

Authentic is authentic it can include nice but thats not a defining quality. 

5 minutes ago, mr_engineer said:

Consider the possibility that I have bigger considerations than this petty dick-measuring game of yours, in which we tell each other how much sex we've had. I have nothing to prove to you. I just won't let you come to me and tell me that 'If you say you're a nice guy, you're not'. Just like I won't let you come in and tell me 'If you say you lift 40 pound dumb-bells, you're not doing that'. What you don't get to do is to call me a liar. 

Yeah 100% if you have to fight about how much of a nice guy you are then youre not simple. Worse for you women have a keen sense for authenticity, so when a guy says their a nice guy thats usually a big red flag for them. If they say nice guys arent nice it probably is a shit test and if you react badly to it you confirm their suspicions that you are actually an asshole but youre covering it in a nice guy facade, which is much worse than if you just owned the fact that youre an asshole. 

Liars a bit strong but you are somewhat dishonest, although you did lie about your 5 conquests right?

[mr_engineer]

3 minutes ago, Consept said:

Authentic is authentic it can include nice but thats not a defining quality. 

What if you have a Jack the Ripper character who is 'authentic'?! Would women want to be with him?! 

5 minutes ago, Consept said:

Yeah 100% if you have to fight about how much of a nice guy you are then youre not simple. Worse for you women have a keen sense for authenticity, so when a guy says their a nice guy thats usually a big red flag for them. If they say nice guys arent nice it probably is a shit test and if you react badly to it you confirm their suspicions that you are actually an asshole but youre covering it in a nice guy facade, which is much worse than if you just owned the fact that youre an asshole. 

I don't care about women who are hellbent on proving to me that I'm an asshole. Because I'm not. So much for 'authenticity'. 

6 minutes ago, Consept said:

Liars a bit strong but you are somewhat dishonest, although you did lie about your 5 conquests right?

For the last time, what I do with my genitals is None. Of. Your. Business. It's starting to get weird and inappropriate that you keep bringing this up. 

[Consept]

3 minutes ago, mr_engineer said:

What if you have a Jack the Ripper character who is 'authentic'?! Would women want to be with him?! 

Jack the Ripper probably got chicks, problem is he killed them. But yeah psychopaths and sociopaths usually do quite will with women

5 minutes ago, mr_engineer said:

I don't care about women who are hellbent on proving to me that I'm an asshole. Because I'm not. So much for 'authenticity'. 

If you say so, everyone has a bit of asshole in them, but obviously not you as you say youre nice

6 minutes ago, mr_engineer said:

For the last time, what I do with my genitals is None. Of. Your. Business. It's starting to get weird and inappropriate that you keep bringing this up. 

Im so curious though  In reality i know its none but its funny how defensive you are 

[mr_engineer]

6 minutes ago, Consept said:

Jack the Ripper probably got chicks, problem is he killed them. But yeah psychopaths and sociopaths usually do quite will with women

If he was honest with women about how many women he's killed, would women want to be with him?! Notice the word 'authenticity' in my question. 

6 minutes ago, Consept said:

If you say so, everyone has a bit of asshole in them, but obviously not you as you say youre nice

If you say 'I'm an asshole' to a girl you're on a date with and then you proceed to yell at the waiter 'hey fuckhead, get me a side of fries', that's you authentically being an asshole. Will a woman want to be with that?! 

All of this is propaganda by dating-coaches to confuse us and to sell their nonsense products. Just be a good person and next the women who don't want that. You'll be fine. 

Edited September 30, 2023 by mr_engineer

[Consept]

7 minutes ago, mr_engineer said:

If he was honest with women about how many women he's killed, would women want to be with him?! Notice the word 'authenticity' in my question. 

YES  Alex Murdaugh who is doing 2 life sentences for killing his wife and son receives tons of emails from women wanting to be with him - https://nypost.com/2023/04/28/alex-murdaugh-receives-scores-of-love-letters-in-prison-i-have-become-obsessed-with-you/ 

Probably not the best women but still. 

 

 

 

 

[mr_engineer]

6 minutes ago, Consept said:

YES  Alex Murdaugh who is doing 2 life sentences for killing his wife and son receives tons of emails from women wanting to be with him - https://nypost.com/2023/04/28/alex-murdaugh-receives-scores-of-love-letters-in-prison-i-have-become-obsessed-with-you/ 

Probably not the best women but still. 

Trolls doing it for publicity. I mean, come on. You don't need an IQ of higher than 10 to realize that it's a bad idea. 

[Nemra]

@mr_engineer

You can be authentic and lie to or keep secrets from others about yourself.

I don't think people here, by being assholes, mean to treat people badly or give a harsh response all the time.

Edited September 30, 2023 by Understander

[mr_engineer]

1 minute ago, Understander said:

@mr_engineer

You can be authentic and lie to or keep secrets from others about yourself.

I don't think people here by being asshole mean to treat people badly or give a harsh response all the time.

That is a strange-loop. 

Reminds me of the Schrodinger's cat paradox. 'It's not true OR false, it's true AND false'!! 

[Nemra]

@mr_engineer

Well, that's life. You can't act the same way in every situation. Not even the way others do.

I think a more deep solution to this is to be honest with yourself all the way.

And being asshole or nice just becomes the way we choose to be. I think the more we detach ourselves from being them, the more we can authentically be them in different situations. And then some people will lean into being assholes or nice without judging the opposite for being themselves.

[Consept]

Just now, Understander said:

@mr_engineer

Well, that's life. You can't act the same way in every situation. Not even the way others do.

I think a more deep solution to this is to be honest with yourself all the way.

And being asshole or nice just becomes the way we choose to be. I think the more we detach ourselves from being them, the more we can authentically be them in different situations. And then some people will lean into being assholes or nice without judging the opposite for being themselves.

Nicely stated 

34 minutes ago, mr_engineer said:

Trolls doing it for publicity. I mean, come on. You don't need an IQ of higher than 10 to realize that it's a bad idea. 

Are you saying that women dont send romantic letters to male prisoners or just do it for publicity? Prisoners get a lot of letters btw. But I like how you dismiss every bit of information to suit your personal narrative. I think youve got some quite good advice in this thread, so take the time to actually absorb it. 

[mr_engineer]

20 minutes ago, Understander said:

@mr_engineer

Well, that's life. You can't act the same way in every situation. Not even the way others do.

I think a more deep solution to this is to be honest with yourself all the way.

And being asshole or nice just becomes the way we choose to be. I think the more we detach ourselves from being them, the more we can authentically be them in different situations. And then some people will lean into being assholes or nice without judging the opposite for being themselves.

The topic of this conversation implies judgement. So, if you have a problem with that, you can let us do the talking. Thanks. 

17 minutes ago, Consept said:

Are you saying that women dont send romantic letters to male prisoners or just do it for publicity? Prisoners get a lot of letters btw. But I like how you dismiss every bit of information to suit your personal narrative. I think youve got some quite good advice in this thread, so take the time to actually absorb it. 

Okay, fine. There are some crazy women who do crazy shit. So what?! Is that the majority of women?! Are we talking about women who have more than a couple of brain-cells here?! 

Don't tell me what to do. Thanks. 

[Consept]

15 minutes ago, mr_engineer said:

Okay, fine. There are some crazy women who do crazy shit. So what?! Is that the majority of women?! Are we talking about women who have more than a couple of brain-cells here?! 

Ill tell you this no girls regardless of quantity of brain cells, are sending love letters to nice guys that complain that girls are only attracted to assholes. 

17 minutes ago, mr_engineer said:

Don't tell me what to do. Thanks. 

OK nice guy, well covered 

[mr_engineer]

1 minute ago, Consept said:

Ill tell you this no girls regardless of quantity of brain cells, are sending love letters to nice guys that complain that girls are only attracted to assholes. 

Did I tell you that I care?!