Masculine attractive energy

[The0Self]

On 9/13/2023 at 3:36 AM, Javfly33 said:

Right, that makes sense. She definetely sensed that. Damn women won't buy any doubt uh, lol. 

Yeah it’s kind of like playing them like an accordion and hitting the wrong note.

(that was a joke)

It’s generally a bad idea to think of it in such a way but still that’s definitely fitting in a sense.

(Not that you’re ”playing” anyone. The point is not to play them but to just play and surrender all seriousness.)

There’s a finite margin of error, is all.

You see, this is why it’s so important to speak with no filter. Attraction switches in both women and men can get flipped both on or off very easily, and women in particular can sense fakeness really, really well.

Edited September 16, 2023 by The0Self

[The0Self]

On 9/12/2023 at 11:23 PM, Leo Gura said:

Of course confidence is key. Confidence is a signal for LEADERSHIP, which is the one thing all girls want.

There is a great old pickup analogy: Treat the girl like you are the captain of a ship going on safari and she boards your ship. Your job is to guide her into a wild, exciting adventure. Do not put her into the captain role. The captain doesn't ask his passengers how to steer the ship.

With girls, don't hesitate. Just do what you feel like doing unless they give you a hard No.

Exactly.

[The0Self]

On 9/12/2023 at 11:45 PM, Princess Arabia said:

What's a hard no vs a soft no. NO! STOP! and no, please stop.... Is there a hard yes vs a soft yes.

A hard no is any actual no whatsoever. Any no other than a joking no perhaps (not very common to begin with). Though of course you get “no not yet” which is to be expected if one sufficiently understands women at the level of casual sex, but some (few) guys hardly even get much “no not yet” if they’re good looking or just kind of laid back or charismatic to begin with and extremely confident and aware of their ability to give the girl probably the best sex she ever will have (so he could kind of just take it or leave it anyway), and able to treat these women as equals (or at least not as above them somehow) and preferably with respect and a conviction that the best way for a woman to grow spiritually and emotionally is with the guy in question.

[The0Self]

On 9/13/2023 at 7:23 PM, SeaMonster said:

No, the rule is that it's upto you to comfortably push the interaction until you meet with resistance at which point you ease off.

You have to throw the  "this is only the Xth date" ideas out the window.   If there is no resistance on the first date, you go all the way.

Exactly. Great way to put it.

 

Sorry for the multi posts, I’m on mobile and it’s preposterously harder to respond to multiple users in one post.

Edited September 16, 2023 by The0Self

[Javfly33]

On 13/9/2023 at 3:29 AM, The0Self said:

 

On 11/9/2023 at 9:40 PM, Sugarcoat said:

 

@The0Self thanks for the messages, very useful.

I have a question, thinking about it now, I can remember she was very receptive to my physical contact like I was touching their hands in a loving way while looking at her eyes and sometimes during the interaction we stare us in each other eyes for some seconds in silence while doing that. So what that means? 

@The0Self here is what I think;

1. She went on the second date with me because even though in the first one there was some hesitation, the interaction still was pretty sensual/romantic like (we even played around with the dynamic of master/submissive). Still, beyond all of that game there was shame and anxiety underneath me and maybe she sensed a bit that. But I think she still liked the interaction very much because she was very receptive. (In my view, that first date was my most fucking smooth and "high temperature"I ever had with a girl).

2. Then, the second date. I think she came to see what happens. Kind of the way of "Ok, I don't know really about this guy, let's see what he does". In this second date for some reason I was way more anxious and doubtful. We got lost in logical conversation. I still played around with her a bit by holding his hands sometimes and other don't, in a playful way. But overall as people are saying here, I was contracted in my blocked energy of fear and Shame that I have in my stomach.

We only make out when saying good bye. 

When I asked her the following day after she told me she only wants to be friends, I kind of get out of her the words that "I didn't felt much desire". But obviously some receptivity were there, If not how she would have been so receptive to physical contact? (And even she being the one that asked me for a second date).

But then probably all of that anxious fearful shame energy underneath me through the second date fuck it all up. I couldn't be myself, allow my desires, lead her, etc...

Another thing I've learned apparently is that girls get 0 invested and attached, at least at this point of the "relationship". She didn't hesitated me in saying me good bye when I told her that I didn't want to be friends. But me is like my whole world crushed for 5 days. What the fuck? Lol

 

 

Edited September 16, 2023 by Javfly33

[SeaMonster]

On 9/14/2023 at 4:20 AM, Javfly33 said:

That definetely makes sense. Thanks for the input.

No problem! Being afraid to go "too far" can definitely frustrate women, which sounds like what happened in your case.

[Princess Arabia]

5 hours ago, Javfly33 said:

Another thing I've learned apparently is that girls get 0 invested and attached, at least at this point of the "relationship"

5 hours ago, Javfly33 said:

(we even played around with the dynamic of master/submissive).

Sounds like you really like her a lot and vice versa. All I can say is, be careful when first meeting someone and doing role play stuff because some people get a bit reserved or confused with this stuff if they're not comfortable with it or even familiar. Not saying this is the case, but just be more observant of this. 

[Javfly33]

7 hours ago, Princess Arabia said:

Sounds like you really like her a lot and vice versa. All I can say is, be careful when first meeting someone and doing role play stuff because some people get a bit reserved or confused with this stuff if they're not comfortable with it or even familiar. Not saying this is the case, but just be more observant of this. 

Yeah I know, I'm definitely do not do play that kind of dynamic almost never lol, but for some reason it popped up and she totally jumped along with me

Edited September 16, 2023 by Javfly33

[The0Self]

@Javfly33 Yeah they generally aren’t going to be invested until sex happens (unless they’re really crushing on you and think you’re above their league). But after it does, there is usually way, way more investment. Especially if it was really good. And even if sex doesn’t happen, IF the foreplay was good, it will probably still be on — unless it got all the way to getting naked or either person touching either genitals bare-handed/skin-on-skin (either their self or the other) and sex/penetration still did not happen before you two parted ways, then the girl will often feel like a slut if she were to see you again and so she just won’t see you again.

Edited September 18, 2023 by The0Self

[Javfly33]

@The0Self so basically to have success with women is all about the Now. If you get too invested or start projecting the power to her you are fucked uh?

Because at first I definitely did not feel like this. At first I was very little invested, teasing her like she was my submissive, replying to text late (not purposely, but because I really didn't care that much yet about her) etc...then once I start seeing her that she was really giving me attention and validation, I think my mind slowly started to turn the tables 180°, until it has happened what has happened.

So my summary is that is wasn't the girls fault nor mine, just that I fell to some kind of bad karmic thoughts of weakness.

Hell, even when she told me that she prefer to not take things further and stay friends, I could have just not cared ? . Instead, I got drown into those karmic thoughts and this following hell week came.

Fuck me. How dumb i was. Fuck Karma. I could have had so much fun with this girl ?

Edited September 18, 2023 by Javfly33

[The0Self]

@Javfly33 If you know girls ahead of time as in they’re from your friend group, it can suffice to only talk to a few at a time, but one thing you have to realize about cold approach is that even if you do everything perfectly, the phone number to sex conversion ratio is going to be 10 to 1 at best. It’s much better if they’re already in your social circle. So cold approach is a numbers game. Never expect it to actually work out with any one particular girl — of course in the moment you want to assume attraction (and assume that everything you are doing is awesome), just don’t be surprised when it doesn’t work out, because again the number to close ratio is going to be no better than 10:1.

Edited September 18, 2023 by The0Self

[Javfly33]

44 minutes ago, The0Self said:

@Javfly33 If you know girls ahead of time as in they’re from your friend group, it can suffice to only talk to a few at a time, but one thing you have to realize about cold approach is that even if you do everything perfectly, the phone number to sex conversation ratio is going to be 10 to 1 at best. It’s much higher if they’re already in your social circle. So cold approach is a numbers game. Never expect it to actually work out with any one particular girl — of course in the moment you want to assume attraction (and assume that everything you are doing is awesome), just don’t be surprised when it doesn’t work out, because again the number to close ratio is going to be no better than 10:1.

@The0Self hahaha nice one man, I definetely fell to that ??

Wow, im surprised by that ratio, that definetely does make me feel not so bad about myself lol

[The0Self]

1 hour ago, Javfly33 said:

@The0Self hahaha nice one man, I definetely fell to that ??

Wow, im surprised by that ratio, that definetely does make me feel not so bad about myself lol

Yeah that’s why I’m telling you. I feel like many guys are just going to give up and think they’re failures when they think 15-20:1 is awful when actually that’s not that bad, and it’s never going to get better than 10:1 no matter what you do (for cold approach), unless like many guys you basically only go for a sure thing in your friend group etc where it’ll be a way better ratio than that, sometimes nearly 100%.

No guy is every girl’s type, and not every girl is trying to have sex right now.

That’s why being immune to rejection is important — by its nature, game is mostly rejection, so once you realize that, you can get on with getting experienced.

Edited September 18, 2023 by The0Self