Masculine attractive energy

[Javfly33]

Would you say masculine attractive energy boils down to taking initiative with self confidence/acceptance?

I recently had a very interesting interaction with a girl. I started making moves on her, touching her hands, kissing her, touching their legs...etc. while doing all of this, I was doing it in a doubtful/testing the waters, kind of way. For me this was normal, since I just had met her 15-20 minutes ago, but she seemed kind of annoyed with it (not in angry of course but in an attitude of "meh, in disappointed with you, I was expecting you to be more direct), because she recriminated me several times by saying things like "you don't have to ask me for everything that you do, you can just do it" ...etc. I do appreciate this honesty of women lol, is quite amazing to receive that direct honest feedback, but I found myself surprised by it.

After that day we exchanged numbers, then we had another date and I did kind of the same, playing with her, kissing her, touching her, ( but of course I could have done this in a more secure/direct way?), Because the following day, she wrote me saying she enjoyed my company but only wants to be friends. I was really surprised by this.

Now you have to fuck the girl on the second date or if not they just lose interest? Wtf lol.

Edited September 11, 2023 by Javfly33

[Sugarcoat]

If you could kiss a girl after 20 min I don’t see how sex on second date seems so crazy for you

Edited September 11, 2023 by Sugarcoat

[The0Self]

You kind of have to lead. If she’s willing to have sex faster than you then you have to push forward, otherwise they will sense reservation/hesitation in you.

[Princess Arabia]

51 minutes ago, The0Self said:

You kind of have to lead. If she’s willing to have sex faster than you then you have to push forward, otherwise they will sense reservation/hesitation in you.

Why does he have to push forward if he's not ready. Seems like it's an obligation for men to be always be ready even if they would rather wait. I'm only saying this because you said "faster than you".

[Leo Gura]

Of course confidence is key. Confidence is a signal for LEADERSHIP, which is the one thing all girls want.

There is a great old pickup analogy: Treat the girl like you are the captain of a ship going on safari and she boards your ship. Your job is to guide her into a wild, exciting adventure. Do not put her into the captain role. The captain doesn't ask his passengers how to steer the ship.

With girls, don't hesitate. Just do what you feel like doing unless they give you a hard No.

Edited September 13, 2023 by Leo Gura

[Princess Arabia]

17 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

With girls, don't hesitate. Just do what you feel like doing unless they give you a hard No

What's a hard no vs a soft no. NO! STOP! and no, please stop.... Is there a hard yes vs a soft yes.

[Razard86]

2 minutes ago, Princess Arabia said:

What's a hard no vs a soft no. NO! STOP! and no, please stop.... Is there a hard yes vs a soft yes.

One of the issues that most women aren't aware of is a lot of women play mind games and communicate indirectly. It's one of the reasons many men find women so confusing. 

For example a woman can say "No please stop," in a very seductive way and the man who is not aware that this is a sexual fetish of hers to play/pretend she doesn't want it so she can have the experience of being whisked away by the man overpowering her. Sometimes women do this also because they don't want to appear as desperate or fast so they pretend they don't want to sleep with you.

Experienced men can pick up on these subtle cues and can distinguish between an Authentic No and a fake seductive No.

It's based on tonality and body language and is all a part of the game of seduction, push and pull. Problem is....the woman can use this after the fact if she is mad at you and claim you raped her. It's why for me personally, I will never deal with a woman who plays around saying "No," unless I can trust she isn't going to pull a reverse card. 

The safest thing to do is stop if you are not sure, and if she gets mad and you lose your chance oh well lol. Life is all about taking chances and you need to know...what are you willing to risk.....me personally I don't like those mind games lol but I get why they do it...

[Princess Arabia]

2 minutes ago, Razard86 said:

The safest thing to do is stop if you are not sure, and if she gets mad and you lose your chance oh well lol.

That's right, and if she gets mad, in this case, then that's a psychologically imbalanced woman because getting mad at a man for complying with your wishes, whether you meant the "no/stop" or not, went from a fantasy to a whole other level. So, it's always best to stop whether it's a soft or hard no and wait for her gestures to continue, which should come lovingly if she really wants you.

In the past, I've had guys ask me if I wanted them to stop without me even saying I wanted them to because that's just the type of guys they were. They sensed I had issues with intercourse where my shit wouldn't accept them easily and would tense up, but I wanted them to and they continued with caution until I finally relaxed enough for penetration. Having no kids, that shit is tight and contracts back to homeostasis (lol) after a while of not having sex. Was that too much info. I get lost in translation sometimes.

[mr_engineer]

In my experience, what women call 'masculinity', in reality, is industriousness. When I'm industrious, I emit pheromones that signal to women 'Him. Get with this guy, he has the testosterone to get everything done and provide for you'. 

This is going to suck for some guys to hear, because what this implies is that the average woman doesn't care about your 'why', what's driving you. They just care that you're driven. And then it's their job to use their sex-appeal to manipulate you into getting with them. The average smart woman will care about your 'why' (whether you're working hard for social validation, for pussy, for materialistic ambitions, or your Life-Purpose), to see what your future is and to make a rational decision as to whether they should be with you or not. They won't care about your struggles, the only reason your 'why' will matter will be for them to make a rational decision. And, a third category of women, women who are empathic, will understand that if you're struggling and frustrated, this will lower the quality of the relationship. This is why they will care about what you're going through! 

Do women 'stand at the finish-line and pick the winners'? No. It's just that the average man is so castrated these days that it's only the top 5% of men who are truly industrious and who are truly emitting these pheromones! 

[Buck Edwards]

50 minutes ago, mr_engineer said:

In my experience, what women call 'masculinity', in reality, is industriousness. When I'm industrious, I emit pheromones that signal to women 'Him. Get with this guy, he has the testosterone to get everything done and provide for you'. 

This is going to suck for some guys to hear, because what this implies is that the average woman doesn't care about your 'why', what's driving you. They just care that you're driven. And then it's their job to use their sex-appeal to manipulate you into getting with them. The average smart woman will care about your 'why' (whether you're working hard for social validation, for pussy, for materialistic ambitions, or your Life-Purpose), to see what your future is and to make a rational decision as to whether they should be with you or not. They won't care about your struggles, the only reason your 'why' will matter will be for them to make a rational decision. And, a third category of women, women who are empathic, will understand that if you're struggling and frustrated, this will lower the quality of the relationship. This is why they will care about what you're going through! 

Do women 'stand at the finish-line and pick the winners'? No. It's just that the average man is so castrated these days that it's only the top 5% of men who are truly industrious and who are truly emitting these pheromones! 

I'm trying to re-read again and again but still can't make any sense of this! 

Dood what pheromones? 

 

 

When do I emit pheromones, please enlighten me?

Edited September 13, 2023 by Buck Edwards

[mr_engineer]

13 minutes ago, Buck Edwards said:

I'm trying to re-read again and again but still can't make any sense of this! 

Dood what pheromones? 

 

 

When do I emit pheromones, please enlighten me?

You emit pheromones when you're 'industrious', i.e. when you're doing a lot, when you're fully exerting yourself. 

[Javfly33]

6 hours ago, The0Self said:

You kind of have to lead. If she’s willing to have sex faster than you then you have to push forward, otherwise they will sense reservation/hesitation in you.

Right, that makes sense. She definetely sensed that. Damn women won't buy any doubt uh, lol. 

5 hours ago, Princess Arabia said:

Why does he have to push forward if he's not ready. Seems like it's an obligation for men to be always be ready even if they would rather wait. I'm only saying this because you said "faster than you".

You have a point, but I think also that personally I might be denying my true wishes and desires and if I had allowed myself to fully be me things would have ended up differently.

Looking back at the interaction I can definitely see i didn't do a lot of things I wanted to do. 

4 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Of course confidence is key. Confidence is a signal for LEADERSHIP, which is the one thing all girls want.

There is a great old pickup analogy: Treat the girl like you are the captain of a ship going on safari and she boards your ship. Your job is to guide her into a wild, exciting adventure. Do not put her into the captain role. The captain doesn't ask his passengers how to steer the ship.

With girls, don't hesitate. Just do what you feel like doing unless they give you a hard No.

Cheers, that makes sense to me, contemplating now I can definetely see I lacked true confidence and leadership. 

[Javfly33]

It still blows my mind that in the first date I was touching her and saying her dirty shit and she was super stimulated and receptive, never had such a sensual interaction so fast so easy, but the second date something gone bad, I really had to do a bad fucking job on the second date to fuck it all up. 

 

Edited September 13, 2023 by Javfly33

[Chives99]

Women don't get mad at you for trying your luck but back off when they aren't reciprocating / arent receptive 

Edited September 13, 2023 by Chives99

[Javfly33]

1 minute ago, Chives99 said:

Women don't get mad at you for trying your luck but back off when they aren't reciprocating / arent receptive 

@Chives99 hard truths

[nhoktinvt]

if she meets other guys, then i'll back off. if not i would say go harder, see how far and deep you can go, good luck with that tho.

Edited September 13, 2023 by nhoktinvt

[Ajax]

Well, you are as free as you have choices. It's not game over for you. Keep ongoing. 

[SeaMonster]

On 9/11/2023 at 3:25 PM, Javfly33 said:

Now you have to fuck the girl on the second date or if not they just lose interest? Wtf lol.

No, the rule is that it's upto you to comfortably push the interaction until you meet with resistance at which point you ease off.

You have to throw the  "this is only the Xth date" ideas out the window.   If there is no resistance on the first date, you go all the way.

Edited September 13, 2023 by SeaMonster

[Javfly33]

@SeaMonster That definetely makes sense. Thanks for the input.

[The0Self]

On 9/12/2023 at 10:23 PM, Princess Arabia said:

Why does he have to push forward if he's not ready. Seems like it's an obligation for men to be always be ready even if they would rather wait. I'm only saying this because you said "faster than you".

Didn’t say he specifically had to regardless of his specific goals, it’s just if he wants to have the highest change of bringing a particular woman (who is behaving like the woman he describes) into his life. He can just find another woman, of course. And of course it doesn’t always work that way. Just giving my two cents for this particular, unique but also commonplace, situation.

And, women are often expecting the guy to want sex no matter what (I’m not saying that’s a true belief), so if the woman wants it faster than the guy, she can perceive that as the guy being reserved with his true desires (self explanatory why that could be a turn off, but it can also seem kinda chickenshit and not representative of her once-building fantasy of “super awesome guy” anymore).

Edited September 16, 2023 by The0Self