My friends are insulting me again and again

[Rishabh R]

Every now and then they troll me , insult me for watching actualized.org.They think that philosophy is just mental jerk off. Even though I am interested in science and I am studying it in my college, I will not stop on the path of self actualization, self help , pursuing philosophy to develop myself. Cause Leo taught me questioning. Thank you. Your episodes - Assumptions is the mother of all screw ups and gaslighting ones were a game changer for me. Maybe I must minimize my exposure to them. However, I am a little jealous of them that how they are able to score better marks than me without taking as much action as me. Maybe , I must focus on understanding and knowledge which will counterintuitively increase my marks. I feel anger towards them. Thank you.

[Bobby_2021]

28 minutes ago, Rishabh R said:

Every now and then they troll me , insult me for watching actualized.org.

Are you unable to watch it in private?

If you are can, then do.

There is no benefit to announcing that you watch this sort of content in your social circle. Instead embody the values and take action. Let the results speak for themselves. 

[Rishabh R]

@Bobby_2021 no cause I watch it using my laptop in my hostel room.

[Yimpa]

If your friends are bullying you, then your best bet is to have an exit strategy and be open to making new friends.  People that bully you are simply not worth your time, and giving them your attention will only make it worse.

By doing this, they will eventually leave you alone and find someone else to abuse.

[Schizophonia]

24 minutes ago, Yimpa said:

If your friends are bullying you, then your best bet is to have an exit strategy and be open to making new friends.  People that bully you are simply not worth your time, and giving them your attention will only make it worse.

By doing this, they will eventually leave you alone and find someone else to abuse.

Let's be concrete :

1) They are not "friends".

2) They are retards.

[Rishabh R]

Thank you @Yimpa and @Schizophonia.

[zurew]

2 hours ago, Rishabh R said:

They think that philosophy is just mental jerk off.

Tell them, that they should educate themselves, before they confidently utter the most surface level things about a subject they know nothing about. You should also tell them, that everything they care about is using or building from philosophy (even being obsessed about being pragmatic is a philosophical approach and foundations of science was set up by philosophers doing philosophy).

Two very easy things that you can mention  about philosophy is logic and morals. Both of them are big sections in philosophy and both are very important to our social and to our every day life. The most tangible and probably the most important for them would be logic, which is a core element to science ,so they should appreciate philosophy just  for that alone (and then obviously a lot more things could be added why one should appreciate philosophy)

 

that being said, regarding your relationship with your friends - if you want to keep them, and if their behaviour deeply bother you, then you should express that and make your boundaries clear about where you draw the line, and if they consistently won't respect your boundaries, then you should cut them off.

 

Edited September 4, 2023 by zurew

[Ulax]

I'd ask them to stop. If they don't, cut them off.

That'd be my recommendation.

[Yimpa]

I also just discovered this quote:

Quote

We don't talk enough about the intense sadness that comes when you begin to heal and lose people in your life who benefited from your brokenness.

- Dr. Caroline Leaf

 

[Hello from Russia]

Don't be friends with people who are being stupud like this

Edited September 4, 2023 by Hello from Russia

[inFlow]

@Rishabh R Never talk about your personal life with your friends, young men don't give a fuck what you are doing, most of them don't even care about it and they will mock you for anything that you are doing above the norm. Believe me I've been there, and the less I talk about how my life is going, what I do in particular, and what kind of experiences/insights I'm getting the better my relationship is with my friends. Of course it's shallow, but they no longer have anything to grab on to, to mock me. Just hide that shit. Learn to own your stuff and don't "leak" it.

[meta_male]

21 hours ago, Rishabh R said:

However, I am a little jealous of them that how they are able to score better marks than me without taking as much action as me.

No need to be jealous. While these sheep worry about getting good grades you're learning about actual life.

[Applegarden8]

On 9/4/2023 at 7:05 PM, Rishabh R said:

Every now and then they troll me , insult me for watching actualized.org.They think that philosophy is just mental jerk off. Even though I am interested in science and I am studying it in my college, I will not stop on the path of self actualization, self help , pursuing philosophy to develop myself. Cause Leo taught me questioning. Thank you. Your episodes - Assumptions is the mother of all screw ups and gaslighting ones were a game changer for me. Maybe I must minimize my exposure to them. However, I am a little jealous of them that how they are able to score better marks than me without taking as much action as me. Maybe , I must focus on understanding and knowledge which will counterintuitively increase my marks. I feel anger towards them. Thank you.

In the long term, you will ace them. Just keep going. Does not matter about short term. If they insult and troll you, it is very clear. They are not your friends. After 5 or 10 years they will look at you and it will be irritating for them. Something very subtle is changing in you. It seems like you have some answers now. Just ignore them and keep going. Just because those life choices are popular does not mean that you have to chase them.

The ironic thing is that I know some group of people that have about the same values (house, car, pets or children, family, profession and what our economy has to offer) and from these people I (like my neighbours) receive the most questions about how I live... well because there are vast number of ways how to live that people acctually choose or are forced to live, but they don't want to hear it. They can laugh all they want, just to get angry and upset 1 minute later about me for reaons they don't know. This is my and your constitutional and human right to be how you want to be. Don't take it lightly. I use this argument if I get very weird criticisms, do you know your rights? For example. There is no paper stating I have to make children, besides, compared to 100 years back, do you really need kids that much? There is 8 billion people. We need to improve those who are already living otherwise my son will go to war aginst your son due to some stupid ideology and we will drown into garbage we produce.

Acctually read what you constitution says, it is pretty refreshing. Understand, you SHOULD HAVE THAT FREEDOM what is written there. Nobody can request you, don't do it because I don't like it or you should do what I do as an open criticism to you - this person is a total loser who doesn't know his rights and does things basically because somebody told him to.

You will be very irritating to average materialistic person which will be your friends in some time going forward.

You will lose some "friends" when your interests change. You will lose some of the even when your food choices will change, there is no more time to hang out and eat junk anymore.

 

Edited September 12, 2023 by Applegarden8

[Spiritual Warrior]

This is a good opportunity for you to set some boundaries with your buddies if you are ready for that. If something that they are doing is angering you, then they should hear about it. I know I would want to hear about it if I was bothering one of my friends with my actions. If they are true friends and care about you, they will take what you are saying with respect. 

I would get it out any way that you can, but try to be as direct as possible, they need to know exactly what they are doing that is making you mad. 

[Razard86]

On 9/5/2023 at 9:25 AM, inFlow said:

@Rishabh R Never talk about your personal life with your friends, young men don't give a fuck what you are doing, most of them don't even care about it and they will mock you for anything that you are doing above the norm. Believe me I've been there, and the less I talk about how my life is going, what I do in particular, and what kind of experiences/insights I'm getting the better my relationship is with my friends. Of course it's shallow, but they no longer have anything to grab on to, to mock me. Just hide that shit. Learn to own your stuff and don't "leak" it.

1. This is toxic advice. I literally have a circle of male friends of over 15 years in which we have shared our personal feelings, ups and down.

2. This type of advice comes from a fear based mentality and is actually the number one reason men kill themselves because when they need to share how they feel many of them have no outlets. There are actually a ton of men out here who are mature and are open to hearing about your life you just have to be open and receptive and you will meet them. I have NO PROBLEM making friends.

What's the secret? Authentically care about other people and always be receptive to feedback from them. 

[inFlow]

6 hours ago, Razard86 said:

1. This is toxic advice.

Dude. See YOU have close MALE friends. We don't. THAT'S A HUGE FUCKING DIFFERENCE.

If you don't have any experience when talking about this particular situation don't even stick your nose here and give us shit that our advice is toxic.

[Ry4n]

On 5/9/2023 at 2:05 AM, Rishabh R said:

Every now and then they troll me , insult me for watching actualized.org.They think that philosophy is just mental jerk off. Even though I am interested in science and I am studying it in my college, I will not stop on the path of self actualization, self help , pursuing philosophy to develop myself. Cause Leo taught me questioning. Thank you. Your episodes - Assumptions is the mother of all screw ups and gaslighting ones were a game changer for me. Maybe I must minimize my exposure to them. However, I am a little jealous of them that how they are able to score better marks than me without taking as much action as me. Maybe , I must focus on understanding and knowledge which will counterintuitively increase my marks. I feel anger towards them. Thank you.

Sounds like you're already figuring it out dude. 

A serious observation of others that helped me:

If you notice your friends nit-picking on every little thing you say and do then that is a VERY insecure person you are dealing with. Why? Because this reveals the exact thought patterns/mental behaviour that they are doing to themselves privately and subsequently directing to you to feel empowered as a coping mechanism to said set of insecurities. 

Doesn't matter what your grades or overall life success is when you have a shitty personality. 

Being a good person is more important than being successful.

[Ry4n]

On 5/9/2023 at 11:25 PM, inFlow said:

Never talk about your personal life with your friends

Shitty* friends. Not that I'm saying one should turn their friends into a therapist because that's a huge problem a lot of people can't figure out, but never saying anything about one's personal life? May as well stop talking to them. The last few years have been hard on everyone. 

[Ry4n]

On 5/9/2023 at 5:02 AM, Ulax said:

I'd ask them to stop. If they don't, cut them off.

That'd be my recommendation.

Self respect in general is something men in particular in this generation are sorely lacking. I think Leo should make a video on it if he hasn't already. How to stand up for oneself. 

[Ry4n]

16 minutes ago, inFlow said:

Dude. See YOU have close MALE friends. We don't. THAT'S A HUGE FUCKING DIFFERENCE.

If you don't have any experience when talking about this particular situation don't even stick your nose here and give us shit that our advice is toxic.

Hope your doing alright mate