Can I use Leo's video on impermanence to cope with a drastic change in my life?

[Husseinisdoingfine]

Greetings.

I have my bags packed and I am set to move out of my parents place and into my dorm room at University within one day as of writing this. I'm really scared and I don't like change. 

For some reason, change, and any change is incredibly disturbing to me. I have and have always had a very fixed and sometimes extreme routine which I will follow religiously. My routines sometimes look very strange, but they're my strange routines, and I love them.

Throughout my whole life, I never liked change. I can vividly recall the unhappiness I felt at changing schools, when a friend would move away, family member would pass away, etc...

But moving away from my parents and into the dormitory, I feel emotional and sad about this because this was my childhood home that I can connect all of my waking memories to. Everything from all the pets we had, to our visitors, to the good and bad times, etc...

One of Leo's videos which is keeping me going is his video on impermanence. I suppose it is silly for me to be emotional about leaving my childhood home, something which is inevitable unless I choose to be some sort of adult loser who lives with their parents. 

 

[Buck Edwards]

Do not rely on others to make life decisions. 

[Princess Arabia]

Your concerns are natural as the mind hates changes and wants to keep you safe. Some people are more adaptable to changes naturally and some have learnt how to make the switch more easily to maneuver without experiencing as much anxiety about such drastic life changing events. Keep in mind, say about a year or so ago, any changes you made that you were anxious about making and how today you have gotten through that said change and now the results seem like a part of you now that you don't think twice about integrating into your life. 

For example, if you were reluctant or felt nervous or anxious about going to a particular school for the first time (insert any major life- changing changes you made here), and how within a short period of time, after being used to that experience how it didn't make you feel anxious anymore. That's usually the case with most changes. The mind just has to get accustomed to the change. In the future, try not to have such fixed routines about minor things that won't matter much to not get the mind so used to being structured. Balance it out a bit. Start with insignificant things like maybe change up a particular route you take or changing up your food choices to a more varied variety as long as you're not changing to a more unhealthy way of eating. 

Being structured can be beneficial at times but can also make things difficult when it's time to make necessary changes. Just tell yourself that this feeling is only temporary and in no time you'll get adjusted. See yourself enjoying the change and visualize having exciting times with your college friends. Try not to get too attached to things in life as a general rule and learn to embrace the impermanence of the nature of Reality. You'll be fine.

 

[Carl-Richard]

That's life for you. You can continue to view change as something scary, or you can choose (partially) to view it as something exciting. And starting university is exciting.

If you miss your home, remember you can always visit. I visited my family frequently back when I studied outside my hometown (today, I study in my hometown so I can visit even more often ?).

Edited September 4, 2023 by Carl-Richard

[Willie]

If you want to embrace life, you must embrace change.

[Guest Bazooka Jesus]

16 hours ago, Willie said:

If you want to embrace life, you must embrace change.

Exactly.

Every change is the death of something old as well as the birth of something new. Embrace both and go with the flow, brother. 

What the caterpillar calls the end, the rest of the world calls a butterfly. 

- Lao Tzu -

[hyruga]

You can use any videos that you want. But make sure they help you.

[Husseinisdoingfine]

I really like this video:

The impermanence video helped me realize that my living situation in my childhood home was inevitably going to change and the people pleasing and loneliness video helped me manage the loneliness and isolation of my college dormitory.   

[Raze]

Impermanence isn’t a philosophical belief, it’s a direct experience brought on from finely investigating the nature of reality.

[Thought Art]

Can be a useful video to watch. Contemplate change, and go through it consciously.