Can't find any compatible guys.

[jdc7733]

I'm looking for a guy who is lighthearted, goofy, gives more than one word messages over text and has a hidden darkness, but, you kinda get a vibe that there's something dark about them, anyway. I guess all guys have a hidden darkness, but, I want them to be kind of soft but dark, but, not feminine, not macho. If not lighthearted and goofy, then, moody, condescending and blunt, but, as I said, not macho. Maybe all of the above. I thought I was looking for someone with the same interests as me but I guess it's more the general personality, I'm looking for... I wasn't going to mention looks but usually I go for skinny or average, narrow jaw, small chin.

[Ajax]

To me, the value of face-to-face interactions cannot be understated.  If it were me looking for a guy, I would get involved in activities that I am interested in and would more than likely find like-minded guys that share common interests. If not, I would be willing to move to a place (city or country) where I would find such guys. 

If I want something bad enough, I will do whatever it takes to get it.  No excuses, no justifications, just making plans and working constantly to make it happen. 

[integral]

30 minutes ago, jdc7733 said:

If not lighthearted and goofy, then, moody, condescending and blunt, but, as I said, not macho.

Its like your looking for a guy who has trauma and is potentially a narcissist. 

I feel like your thinking with your sexual fantasies (dick)... and not with your best interests at heart, like a life partner. 

Edited August 19, 2023 by integral

[jdc7733]

@integral You can have romantic fantasies too. 

[Leo Gura]

The only solution is to socialize more to increase your odds. It's a numbers game. The more people you meet the more likely you are to meet exceptional matches. There's not any magic to it, you just gotta invest energy in socializing way more. Consistency is the key. Half the battle is won just by showing up every day when you could be doing something else.

Edited August 20, 2023 by Leo Gura

[Hardkill]

20 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

The only solution is to socialize more to increase your odds. It's a numbers game. The more people you meet the more likely you are to meet exceptional matches. There's not any magic to it, you just gotta invest energy in socializing way more. Consistency is the key. Half the battle is won just by showing up every day when you could be doing something else.

Why is it impossible to have such terrible luck that you never find any person compatible with you even if you meet and ask out millions of different people?

[Buck Edwards]

Looks like a personality recipe found in bdsm dungeons. 

[Schizophonia]

It's me lol 

34 minutes ago, Buck Edwards said:

Looks like a personality recipe found in bdsm dungeons. 

[Leo Gura]

1 hour ago, Hardkill said:

Why is it impossible to have such terrible luck that you never find any person compatible with you even if you meet and ask out millions of different people?

There is no point worrying about things you cannot control, only those you can.

Raising your numbers does not give any gaurantees, it's just the best overall strategy.

[Greatnestwithin]

3 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

There is no point worrying about things you cannot control, only those you can.

Raising your numbers does not give any gaurantees, it's just the best overall strategy.

@Leo GuraWill you do a vlog sharing some updates, how you are? What you see Next for you etc ?

[Hardkill]

14 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

There is no point worrying about things you cannot control, only those you can.

Raising your numbers does not give any gaurantees, it's just the best overall strategy.

So, then what do you do if millions of different people don't find you compatible? Should you then just accept that you're never find anyone who will be the right fit for you no matter what you do?

Edited August 20, 2023 by Hardkill

[Schizophonia]

3 minutes ago, Hardkill said:

So, then what do you do if millions of different people don't find you compatible? Should you then just accept that you're never find anyone no matter what you do?

million? downright ? 

That's a lot of dates ! 

[jdc7733]

Fair point. Also, I think I need to stop looking for a fantasy. I give off red flags and I'm picky, even without looking for a specific kind of guy, so, the chances are slim enough anyway.@Leo Gura

[jdc7733]

@Schizophonia you would be my type if you were older. You got that darkness to you

Your profile says you are 20, I thought you were like 17-18 haha. At least you won't have wrinkles when you're 30

Edited August 20, 2023 by jdc7733
To add more

[Buck Edwards]

12 minutes ago, jdc7733 said:

@Schizophonia you would be my type if you were older. You got that darkness to you

Your profile says you are 20, I thought you were like 17-18 haha. At least you won't have wrinkles when you're 30

Maybe he likes someone else. 

[jdc7733]

@Buck Edwards I actually don't see what you're trying to say (I'm a bit dumb (could be a shit AI but even that would probably understand))

[Buck Edwards]

Just now, jdc7733 said:

@Buck Edwards I actually don't see what you're trying to say (I'm a bit dumb (could be a shit AI but even that would probably understand))

First look for someone who you simply get along with, that alone is a tough job as it is. Don't start with fantasies. You'll be attracting some wrong kind of people that way. Our fantasies are not always in line with what's best for us. You can fulfill those fantasies during role play. But the very first requirement is always safety. Look for safe people and that will be the greatest advice anybody will give you. After your most basic needs of emotions and security are fulfilled, you will automatically fall in the right gear, I can tell you that even these fantasies won't matter at the time because once you find that cherished person, you'll gaze at them with absolute joy and thunder, the spark that is inextinguishable and spending time with that special person alone will be your greatest fantasy. When you start with a checklist of stuff you want in people, it usually alchemically attracts the kind of people who are weird and who are hiding parts of themselves you don't wanna know. Start with the fundamentals first and then move upwards. Any person who looks perfect to you as per your checklist of desires would be the farthest from perfect and you would end up in a mess. It's not what we desire, it's what blends with us. And that means hardcore values like commitment, someone ready to be there when you need them. Even if you find someone the way you desire, it will be gimmicky and they will fly away before you wake up. Look for character, not charm. Charm is intoxicating, yet misleading. 

[jdc7733]

@Buck Edwards fair point.

[jdc7733]

29 minutes ago, Buck Edwards said:

Maybe he likes someone else. 

I was referring to this though.

Edited August 20, 2023 by jdc7733

[Leo Gura]

2 hours ago, Hardkill said:

So, then what do you do if millions of different people don't find you compatible? Should you then just accept that you're never find anyone who will be the right fit for you no matter what you do?

You are exaggerating and creating stories.

You can find people.