Looking For Dating Advice In College

[Shaggy]

Hello everyone. I am a male in my early 20s who has very little experience with women and has never had a girlfriend before. I am introverted as a person. I have over the years worked a lot on my social skills so that I am more comfortable in any social situation. I would now like to focus on working on my dating life. I could mention that I almost never go out and dislike going to clubs. 

I have watched Leos video on "Advice for high school and college students" and in there he mentions that in college you should get into relationships and date more. However he later advocates to not party and join social groups. In another video "How to get a girlfriend" he mentions to go out more often and be more social.

I am a little bit confused as how to meet and date women if he advocates on not going out. Also are there any other ways that I could meet women outside of night time parties and clubs?

[Spiral]

I find it strange that he recommend us not to join social groups, i mean can't hurt to make some more friends right? Not to mention that women generally like social guys.

Regarding parties, well i suppose if you want to improve you sexual skills and possibly improve you "seduction skills" . Since drunk people are easier to seduce.  That being said, don't go out parting and sleeping around all the time intil you are done with college. I simply invite you to try a few times (preferably sober) and talk to a few girls and see what happens

If you really want to make yourself a long term girlfriend i would recommend doing so through other types of social events and/or just good old fashioned pick-up. Or possible through a class you have and have to work in groups, i personally enjoy begin a few minutes early to class so that get to talk to the other students that i normally do not talk to. Online dating sites might also work. 

What kind of things do you like? Maybe it is possible to do them while being among/with other people instead of at home?

Having a female friend really helped me get a hang of those mysterious beings, and if you play your cards right who knows what could happen. 

P.S I'm not saying that you do this, but generally women under 30 generally prefer to be called girls.

[aurum]

I understand where Leo is coming from when he advocates not partying. I look at how much time I spent partying, i.e destroying my body and drowning my pain, and I just shake my head.

That being said, every parent tries to keep their kid from partying and it does no good. Why? Because if the desire is there, it's there. Repressing it only usually makes it worse.

I've seen kid after kid who held back partying in high school because of their parents...and then as soon as they hit college explode.

How else can you really learn? Sometimes you have to make the mistake yourself.

So there's something to be said for looking at personal development as a process. Yeah, maybe you'll look back in 5-10 years and realize you wasted a bunch of your time. But now that insight is personal and genuine. Not something someone just told you to do.

So I'm not going to tell you to party or don't party. I'll just say follow that intuition. You'll figure it out.

14 hours ago, Shaggy said:

Also are there any other ways that I could meet women outside of night time parties and clubs?

There definitely are. And the fact that you're in college means every time you step outside there's a chance.

See that girl in class? How about that one sitting on the bus? In line at the store? You can talk to all of them.

There is literally nothing stopping you except maybe some beliefs you have.

Also, how about building a social circle? Join some clubs, join greek life, join it all. College is filled with this kind of stuff.

There are no shortage of opportunities. Only your willingness to receive them.

[Shin]

Quote

I have over the years worked a lot on my social skills so that I am more comfortable in any social situation.

Next step would be to be funny/confident.

If you can be funny and confident,

Women will jump at you and eat you to the death.

Edited March 25, 2017 by Shin