What can I do about my dating situation? Insights & Feedback Appreciated

[ValiantSalvatore]

Yo I've been contemplating for a while to write a post and write about my current dating situation. I am quiet dejected due to a couple of things, especially not being able to hit my "edginess" anymore due to injury and just the maintenance of work life balance. 

I took a dating course by David DeAngelo (the vault of this has been taken down) and with the current generation I'd might say it's close to useless as a course. The principles are good, yet what I learned (I quit after 45 days & apps make stuff limited) does not seem to translate that well & my lifestyle options are severely limited, due to injury especially the fun & female attracting stuff type things are limited. Like martial arts, dancing, ball sports, freeletics & generally aesthetic sculpting of my body. I am stuck in a pattern that I can't really seem to break out of with texting. I stopped texting like a player as I joined a group of players, yet the right-wing & libertarian toxic mindset of some and the constant negative feedback & projections given by some members made me left this group. I joined the official game global Telegram & Facebook, to find a new place with potential feedback & help. 

Last weekend I went out with a girl I meet from Bumble, the meet-up was pretty good we stayed long & talked, drank wine etc. I liked her I did not escalate as I did not really feel anything, even when there was sexual attraction, the current dating patterns and just the sameness of girl who are attracted to me makes me partially disinterested in girls who like me. I don't enjoy as much "culture&travel" anymore and I lost my edginess and I feel internally not as strong anymore, there is a lot detachment of outcome, yet no spike to spark attraction. The girl texted back late, explaining her situation I invited her out after she explained & I am waiting for her reply. I did not escalate also as I enjoyed the chill vibe so much I was glad to be just there and talk, I was also afraid of rejection at some level as all of this dating stuff public without people that know me and being around people who know me. I notice how the blockade of not escalating is there due to fear of being ridiculed in public of liking girls and such subtle dumb jokes, I was bullied with this subtle gaslighting mentally bullying shit a lot when I was very young. 

I also don't find a girl I feel a strong sexual desire with & the girl I liked the most who said yes to meeting up deleted me today. When I was out with my date (very attractive girl) I liked the more hotter & sexier ones who were able to see lust&love can be the same type of energy & generally playing with desire. So, yes they are there I just don't meet them via app & socially currently also not through my current social circle, I am also heavily attracted to hot & crazy girls and some who are more devious & intelligent. I just don't seem to attract them and I am hypersensitive which does not make it easier. As this can make me loose stable yang/masculine energy. 

Some other things:

• I gained 7kg of muscles and can lift 100kg bench press & 150kg squats despite injury.
• An abnormal amount of girls deleted me as I enacted the player frame and I had to rethink & stop.
• I'll take some photos with my current gym partner for dating (playing pool & lifting weights)
• The injury holds me back energetically to express myself fully and restricts fast&intense movements - authenticity lost
• I lost a real desire & have a real actually extreme fear of being a player due to Andrew Tate also being multicultural and the internal collective guilt I feel 
• I lost a serious edge on my warrior archetype & healthy stage red and assertiveness which a lot of girls love - I can't lie to myself here
• 10-20 matches deleted me with player text game 
• Most girls flake on agreeing to meet-up 

Any thoughts & insights on what to do & what can help? It's extremely exhausting currently to do any of this, and I am heavily dejected to not fully being able to build the body of my dreams and loosing edge. My friends won't do game & doing it solo currently with working & studying is still mentally very taxing. I might do it solo, if I get my salary. 

I don't feel I can be me anymore and naturally get girls as the injury hamperes the authentic expression of my character and ambition immensely. Also if anyone is up for some level of accountability partnership, that'd would be the best solution to this scenario, as I am obviously still improving & I know a lot of theory I just can't practice it well due injury and constantly finding alternatives I am a littler slower on growing, yet I can give support quiet well. As long as we agree on some parameters of respect in treating each other well.

[Raze]

I don’t understand what your complaint is specifically 

[ValiantSalvatore]

4 hours ago, Raze said:

I don’t understand what your complaint is specifically 

I wrote in a very general way, as I struggle to identify the issue itself, as there are multiple, if I'd condense it to a single or two question I would re-write it as the following:

• How can I develop the internal drive & edginess to be cocky&confident again and what is that for you, in that sense what helps you to create inner game?

That is mostly it, fundamentally I feel the better my connection to god/consciouness/life purpose the better my abillity to get girls. I lost a huge edge as I love&prided myself on physical fitness and I just don't have this edge anymore. Going out is tricky, I'll go to social events and make new friends, yet there is this barrier of the "animal inside" that I can't touch very well. 

I do some of the outer, and integrate some of the inner, yet that edge is missing. I could also expect as much and I am already doing the right thing. 

 

[Raze]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lOae2s8JOUE

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fIsy_HSHkKo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QV2NX7Ik4cI

https://www.girlschase.com/content/can-you-beat-bad-boy-and-get-girl

https://www.girlschase.com/comment/18124

https://www.girlschase.com/content/how-be-edgy-and-turn-women

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LlJLLjE9_To

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-YoapA4BpRU

 

Edited August 4, 2023 by Raze

[ValiantSalvatore]

@Raze Thank you man, these articles & videos are awesome and dive right into the problem, I checked out Dr.Tians podcast a bunch of times thanks to you!

Edited August 4, 2023 by ValiantSalvatore