Getting death threat text messages from a girl I just met

[charlie cho]

Anybody get an experience like this? Got on a date with her. Totally normal. Wanted to fuck her but only kissed, but she was going somewhere. A few days later

With some miscommunication with calling and text.... with all the texting

This woman gave me serial killer vibes. I get it if she was truly angry wanting to kill me or (cook me) as she said it... What chilled me was that she was laughing and enjoying the process of saying these things. Posting messages to me of clowns, and even homicidal women in my country.

I know this sounds very comical. What was scary was that the woman wasn't angry, but she was laughing while posting websites of news articles, pictures, and weird texts. 

I actually posted this just a few hours ago with detailed explainations, but I just thought this was much simpler, and I wanted your taste in this. 

By the way, this all occured because I called her 'weird'. I didn't even say anything profane to her. The reason I was concerned about her body language in text was because in my country and the neighbor, japan, doesn't allow our messaging apps to turn off read receipts, so I have to assume the pictures and websites she sent me was already stored in her fucking phone. She kept telling me whenever I replied slowly (as if I was with another woman or person),  and not immediately to her, so when I called her 'weird', she felt aroused for violence. 

Which was fucking weird if you ask me. So essentially, my calling her that may have been rude, but it's not uncalled for. 

Telling me she misses her pasttime in jail, she said she wants to cook me, (which sounded comical to me at first, but probably it shouldn't), of course, I blocked her. TF, I would expect a person to call me a cu** or a fuckin asshole on text if I was being rude, but these posts websites, clown pictures and the way she spoke scared the fuck out of me. 

Edited July 28, 2023 by charlie cho

[The Redeemer]

Just block her and delete this from your memory.

[Ulax]

@charlie cho Maybe she just has a dark sense of humor.

But she also might be an unhinged maniac  lmao. Does sound like she might have a few screws loose upstairs ahaha.

If you do end up dating her again I'd do a restaurant dinner. That way she is well fed and doesn't try to eat you.

Sincerely tho, blocking probs was the right move imo.

[charlie cho]

8 minutes ago, Ulax said:

@charlie cho Maybe she just has a dark sense of humor.

But she also might be an unhinged maniac  lmao. Does sound like she might have a few screws loose upstairs ahaha.

If you do end up dating her again I'd do a restaurant dinner. That way she is well fed and doesn't try to eat you.

Sincerely tho, blocking probs was the right move imo.

The problem is .... (just reading what I've written above again)... I realize I made it all sound like a joke. 

Yes, partly she made it look like a joke, and she was kind of trying to make it humorous, but it was very evident that when I called her 'weird' she was ticked off. I called her that because of her behavior the night before, when she called me 3 times that day, and the last time, I got her call, but she suddenly tried to turn the phone off from me because she was 'sleepy'. 

Evidently, while texting me those homicidal texts, she thought I was speaking with another girl on the phone, because she called while I was callilng an old school buddy of mine.

Anyway, I know I should be ignoring these kinds of women from the get-go, but this was a rare occurence for me because it's the first time I've actually encountered a person showing me their colors (at least, PARTS of their colors) quite genuinely to me on text. And I know this is not only rare in real life situations, being honest and true, and even ridiculous, but it is much more difficult to get people like this on text. 

To be quite honest, I was very .... ..... felt..... a bit angry at her stupidity. 

Because being true and even showing dark sides in real life interactions may be more easier than writing something permanent on the phone text messaging app or anything on paper. 

Edited July 28, 2023 by charlie cho

[Ulax]

33 minutes ago, charlie cho said:

The problem is .... (just reading what I've written above again)... I realize I made it all sound like a joke. 

Yes, partly she made it look like a joke, and she was kind of trying to make it humorous, but it was very evident that when I called her 'weird' she was ticked off. I called her that because of her behavior the night before, when she called me 3 times that day, and the last time, I got her call, but she suddenly tried to turn the phone off from me because she was 'sleepy'. 

Evidently, while texting me those homicidal texts, she thought I was speaking with another girl on the phone, because she called while I was callilng an old school buddy of mine.

Anyway, I know I should be ignoring these kinds of women from the get-go, but this was a rare occurence for me because it's the first time I've actually encountered a person showing me their colors (at least, PARTS of their colors) quite genuinely to me on text. And I know this is not only rare in real life situations, being honest and true, and even ridiculous, but it is much more difficult to get people like this on text. 

To be quite honest, I was very .... ..... felt..... a bit angry at her stupidity. 

Because being true and even showing dark sides in real life interactions may be more easier than writing something permanent on the phone text messaging app or anything on paper. 

@charlie cho To be fair mate, I note you did talk in your original post about it seeming like a joke, but it being serious for you. I also didn't read the title of your post properly before commenting. My mistake. Death threats are a serious situation.

So, I get how my jokes could come across as trivializing your situation dude. On reflection, I would have been more sincere in my reply or not commented at all.

Edited July 28, 2023 by Ulax

[charlie cho]

@The Redeemer lol delete this from my memory. I think i already did. The problem is, she quite nice to look at.

Edited July 28, 2023 by charlie cho

[Sugarcoat]

1 hour ago, charlie cho said:

Got on a date with her. Totally normal.

Didn’t you have anyyyy suspicions at all? Like no sign of weirdness already? That’s surprising then if she could seem normal or you just didn’t notice, didn’t sense properly. Because I’ve been in a situation with a woman who also was crazy like that but she showed signs from the get go, so I’m suprised if it’s possible for such people to seem normal 

[Buck Edwards]

You shouldn't call someone weird. That can be insulting. I have met people who are strange in text. Yet I control my temptation to call them weird. It can easily hurt sentiments and is a direct attack on self esteem. 

Avoid all sorts of profanities in text, even minor, unless you're angry and rage texting which can be explained later. 

Just general thumb rule, avoid uncomfortable texting. 

Her behavior is fine. Lots of people talk about serial killers, gore etc. It's only "strange" when she is taking it too far to the the point of unbearable or overbearing. And there's too little you'll know about a person just through text. You gotta have more substance, like a compilation of six months conversations to be able to semi-accurately analyze a person's entire personality. A bunch of texts is never enough. Also it's the vibe you communicate. The same person who is being an asshole to you can be nice to many people. Too easy to jump to conclusions. The same persons offline are just normal and chill. Take it easy and be nice. 

[charlie cho]

@Sugarcoat thats exactly my question sherlock. But again, attractive people tend to be.. u know.

I heard jordan peterson recommend people to watch how pyschopaths work

Watch this 

But indeed she was a very good kisser. I like how she wore clothes and how she did her nails and toe nails white. Mind I tell you, she was very very socially calibrated too!

Which was hilarious when I gradually gotten to see her go insane through text. 

But if Im honest, i myself have shown tremendous different dark sides when I wrote to people. 

Like how in our diaries we write the most haenouss things without our being conscious, its the same things in writing to someone. 

So maybe its not so strange she had written such gore messages to me. Perhaps, it was to be expected!

I heard a police officer say, its often the most attractive people who actually so the crimes, but we are so easily happy to blame the unattractive men to be doing the crimes. Perhaps it was to be expected that she would write such things or even be a pyscho! A real one.

Edited July 28, 2023 by charlie cho

[charlie cho]

14 minutes ago, Enlightement said:

You shouldn't call someone weird. That can be insulting. I have met people who are strange in text. Yet I control my temptation to call them weird. It can easily hurt sentiments and is a direct attack on self esteem. 

Avoid all sorts of profanities in text, even minor, unless you're angry and rage texting which can be explained later. 

Just general thumb rule, avoid uncomfortable texting. 

Her behavior is fine. Lots of people talk about serial killers, gore etc. It's only "strange" when she is taking it too far to the the point of unbearable or overbearing. And there's too little you'll know about a person just through text. You gotta have more substance, like a compilation of six months conversations to be able to semi-accurately analyze a person's entire personality. A bunch of texts is never enough. Also it's the vibe you communicate. The same person who is being an asshole to you can be nice to many people. Too easy to jump to conclusions. The same persons offline are just normal and chill. Take it easy and be nice. 

Yo, read carefully before you write. I called her weird, because she blocked my phone calls (oh, i just realized writing this I didnt mention this haha)

Anyway, i didnt call her any profane word. 

Avoid uncomfortable texting?

Then I would have to guess you were never having any real conversations with texting in your life yourself.

Because real conversations require discomfort. But please, i have no time to argue with anyone here. Because I have a horrifying premonition that you will try to argue with me, in which I would dread because I dont have such time here to do that. 

 

Mind i tell you, she said she will 'cook' me. So, when I said she was weird, i dont think I was inaccurate my dear friend. 

The real question is, how can I be genuine with people on text, but also being able to be safe and sound in life from such attractive psychotic women!

Edited July 28, 2023 by charlie cho

[Buck Edwards]

Just now, charlie cho said:

Yo, read carefully before you write. I called her weird, because she blocked my phone calls (oh, i just realized writing this I didnt mention this haha)

Anyway, i didnt call her any profane word. 

Avoid uncomfortable texting?

Then I would have to guess you were never having any real conversations with texting in your life yourself.

Because real conversations require discomfort. But please, i have no time to argue with anyone here.

What I meant is avoid uncomfortable texting at first if you wish to avoid getting bombarded by a triggered person. This is of course in the beginning of a relationship when intimacy is not yet fully established, the other person can detect any sign of profanity, even minor rude insults or words can be very triggering to strangers. Once you're deep into a relationship and quite intimate on a level, that's where what you say doesn't matter much and you can easily work through miscommunication. Don't expect this in the beginning though. Most people are uptight and keep a guard against someone they text the first couple of times and it can be a stressing situation making them wanna easily quit, block or even go on a massive rage text. Yes, anger issues probably. But a lot of people get out off or annoyed when they meet a rude stranger. Your first impression should be unequivocally empathetic to impeccable levels. Your outbursts or complaints can be reserved for later in the relationship when a certain comfort is reached on both ends. Don't jump at someone who could be unsuspecting. Judging from your text, you're easily triggered and cannot handle a critique. Don't take that same energy into your first dates and texts. 

[charlie cho]

9 minutes ago, Enlightement said:

What I meant is avoid uncomfortable texting at first if you wish to avoid getting bombarded by a triggered person. This is of course in the beginning of a relationship when intimacy is not yet fully established, the other person can detect any sign of profanity, even minor rude insults or words can be very triggering to strangers. Once you're deep into a relationship and quite intimate on a level, that's where what you say doesn't matter much and you can easily work through miscommunication. Don't expect this in the beginning though. Most people are uptight and keep a guard against someone they text the first couple of times and it can be a stressing situation making them wanna easily quit, block or even go on a massive rage text. Yes, anger issues probably. But a lot of people get out off or annoyed when they meet a rude stranger. Your first impression should be unequivocally empathetic to impeccable levels. Your outbursts or complaints can be reserved for later in the relationship when a certain comfort is reached on both ends. Don't jump at someone who could be unsuspecting. Judging from your text, you're easily triggered and cannot handle a critique. Don't take that same energy into your first dates and texts. 

No I can handle a critique! How dare you!

But maybe, youre right. What you said is very very true. I do have to be very 'unequivocably empathetic to impeccable levels.' Because they are women Ive just met.

Youre right, i didnt have 'unequivocable empathy' for stranger women. You're right........

But why should I? Have unequivocable empathy?!

Edited July 28, 2023 by charlie cho

[Buck Edwards]

17 minutes ago, charlie cho said:

Mind i tell you, she said she will 'cook' me. So, when I said she was weird, i dont think I was inaccurate my dear friend. 

Yea that's weird, I get it. You could have laughed it off. Play it off. I'd do the same, in fact I already have on multiple occasions. It's no big deal. People have said the weirdest things to me directly and I have played along. It's a social skill. 

Not everyone you just meet is a psychopath. 

She ain't psychotic. She probably isn't. 

It seems you judge people too prematurely. The snowflake thing sort of. 

 

Edited July 28, 2023 by Enlightement

[charlie cho]

@Enlightement imagine I wrote to you, after having touched and flirted with you on dates, a few days later "where is your address?" "Im going to kill you." "Lets meet now :)" "ill ve there in 2 hours I assume"On text. How will you respond?

Or was I triggered? Laugh it off?! Take her on another date?

If I could show you the homicidal articles and clown pictures she sent me while I asked her to calm down. The 50 emojis she sent me every time I left her unread 3 seconds. I wonder if you could laugh it off.

In fact, i did laugh it off come to think of it. 

She said she missed her time in prison (am i supposed to believe her?), and got on a long history of what she did to get there.

So i asked "what do you miss most?" Laughing. 

And she replied "ramen"

Saying how she was aroused by what i said about "weirdness"and myself replying late. Late? Text her every 3 seconds?!

With unequivocavle empathy?!

Edited July 28, 2023 by charlie cho

[Buck Edwards]

Just now, charlie cho said:

@Enlightement imagine I wrote to you, after having touched you on dates, a few days later "where is your address?" "Im going to kill the girl and you." On text. How will you respond?

The context is important here. Why would you write that to me, unless I did something or said something to you that wasn't appropriate in the first place? 

I don't believe people who are usually normal just randomly go around giving death threats for nothing. There has to be a back and forth. Although death threats is a real bad thing, you've no idea how many times I have received those even casually from friends. But it's mostly for shits and giggles. I have had people tell me they will choke me to death. Because they were really angry in the moment. They will never actually do that. People generally say attention seeking things to get a reaction out of you, it's immature but it works. It's also their gullibility and vulnerability. Someone might not be in their best mental states when they say that and you could be a bit forgiving. Someone could be on drugs. Someone could be goofing around. Someone could be drunk. Give them space to apologize or make good out of something. Be chill in the moment but be careful. 

If someone writes like that to me, I would have a full conversation to see what went wrong and why they are angry/offended. I would explain them that's not an appropriate thing to say. I would have patience. I would let them know that I'm taking it seriously if they really mean it and I would tell them that it's a deal breaker and they can't say that again. I'd wait for them to take back what was said, change or apologize. I'd want to know their real intent and if it was just in words. 

If they continue the same behavior despite warnings, I'd discontinue the relationship as it borders on abusive and some psych issues. But If they are having a turnaround and want to work on their immaturity, then I would be willing to support them.

Most often such threats aren't real and just attention seeking behavior underneath the veneer. 

On the flip side, if a person doesn't see their behavior as bad, never apologizes and fully mean what they say, then I would back the fuck off and be ready to call the cops on them or let them know that I would be filing restraining orders and block that person after getting to know their identity credentials. 

It's easy. Just block if you know their behavior is serious and unwarranted. If it's a temporary outburst, tell them to explain it. 

This depends on your own personal boundaries and what's tolerable to you. But context is always relative. 

 

[integral]

I dont know man, i think you can tell everything you need to know about someone by the tone of there voice. 

[charlie cho]

11 minutes ago, Enlightement said:

The context is important here. Why would you write that to me, unless I did something or said something to you that wasn't appropriate in the first place? 

I don't believe people who are usually normal just randomly go around giving death threats for nothing. There has to be a back and forth. Although death threats is a real bad thing, you've no idea how many times I have received those even casually from friends. But it's mostly for shits and giggles. I have had people tell me they will choke me to death. Because they were really angry in the moment. They will never actually do that. People generally say attention seeking things to get a reaction out of you, it's immature but it works. It's also their gullibility and vulnerability. Someone might not be in their best mental states when they say that and you could be a bit forgiving. Someone could be on drugs. Someone could be goofing around. Someone could be drunk. Give them space to apologize or make good out of something. Be chill in the moment but be careful. 

If someone writes like that to me, I would have a full conversation to see what went wrong and why they are angry/offended. I would explain them that's not an appropriate thing to say. I would have patience. I would let them know that I'm taking it seriously if they really mean it and I would tell them that it's a deal breaker and they can't say that again. I'd wait for them to take back what was said, change or apologize. I'd want to know their real intent and if it was just in words. 

If they continue the same behavior despite warnings, I'd discontinue the relationship as it borders on abusive and some psych issues. But If they are having a turnaround and want to work on their immaturity, then I would be willing to support them.

Most often such threats aren't real and just attention seeking behavior underneath the veneer. 

On the flip side, if a person doesn't see their behavior as bad, never apologizes and fully mean what they say, then I would back the fuck off and be ready to call the cops on them or let them know that I would be filing restraining orders and block that person after getting to know their identity credentials. 

It's easy. Just block if you know their behavior is serious and unwarranted. If it's a temporary outburst, tell them to explain it. 

This depends on your own personal boundaries and what's tolerable to you. But context is always relative. 

 

Ok. Fine. You will try to understand them despite that person talking about killing you, mind you the girl had a degree of humor and seriousness, when talking about all this. These two qualities are scary as shit. You will try to understand that person. Haha. Believe it or not. I did try to do that. But not with 'unequivocable empathy', until whenever i tried to sleep there were 50 emojis on my notifications of smiling bears. And clown pictures. 

 

Edited July 28, 2023 by charlie cho

[charlie cho]

8 minutes ago, integral said:

I dont know man, i think you can tell everything you need to know about someone by the tone of there voice. 

Perhaps. Some psychopaths ... huh.... i dont know. 

[Buck Edwards]

1 minute ago, charlie cho said:

Ok. Fine. You will try to understand them despite that person talking about killing you, with humor and seriousness. You will try to understand that person. Haha. Believe it or not. I did try to do that. But not with 'unequivocable empathy'

Explain them that you won't be taking it. Tell them to explain their behavior. If nothing pans out, then block. This is an interpersonal issue, something that a forum cannot help you with, since we don't know that person, that person isn't here talking to us. 

Chances are if that person is here watching and responding to what you are writing, they would probably explain everything in a different way. 

It's he said she said type of a thing. There is nobody to defend her side of the story, the story itself is inadequate since you haven't said a single word about your part of the conversation which sets off as a red flag of narcissistic behavior as in most cases of narcissism, typical one sided story telling and twisting narrative and context and framing the other person as terrible is quite prevalent in observation. 

I'm getting similar vibes here. "she is psychotic." yet enough explanations weren't provided as to what might have set off this so called "psychotic person" who was apparently perfectly normal in real life. Doesn't that look suspicious already? 

[integral]

lmaooo man you missed out on some wild sex and brutal break up