You're a selfish fuck. And that's ok.

[ivankiss]

Just admit it. Admit it to yourself, admit it to everyone else. Accept it. Own it.

You are selfish and you cannot go around it. It all comes back to you. It's always about you. Everything is. All the time. Even when you make it seem as if it's about something or someone else, it's still about you. Especially then.

If you look deep enough and you're honest enough, you'll realize it's all about you. 

You might wish only the best for others, you might care deeply for them, you might want to help them or guide them... but don't you fool yourself thinking that's a completely selfless act. Thinking you're not involved in any way. Thinking you're doing this solely for them. They are helping you as much as you're helping them. They're helping you to fulfill your desire of helping others, they're giving you an opportunity to step into that role of a hero, a saviour, that you most like really wanna play, underneath it all. You like the position that puts you in, don't you? It's incredibly selfish. You know it is.

And that's just one example of course.

You think Jesus wasn't selfish when he sacrificed himself? You think allowing yourself to be nailed to the cross is a completely selfless act? You think there was no doubt running through Jesus's mind when he was bleeding out on that cross? Jesus didn't say: "Thank God there's no self here!Thank god it's all just an illusion!" Lol. No. Jesus said "Father, why have you forsaken me?" He was in agony. Believe me there was a self intact, very much so. A self with an agenda. With values, beliefs, ideas and all that jazz.

You think Buddha was completely selfless while jerking off under that tree? You think Leo is completely selfless and he loves you so much and cares about your awakening? You think any of this has to do with anyone else but Leo? Haha. Fool. No one gives a fuck. Not even God. Not even you.

You don't really give a fuck. No matter how hard you try to convince yourself and everyone else... you simply don't care about anything else but yourself.

And yes, it is all The Self. It is all You. But let's not kid anyone... that's not where you are at. You do not really care about The Big Self. You only care about your limited little self, your precious imaginary identity that you guard so well, your name, your pride. Even if, especially if it's an identity painted with spiritual colours. 

It's ok. It might really seem as if you're completely alone, and yes, you are, but trust me, you're also not. Every other petty little self cares only about itself. Nothing special about you there.

The moment you admit that, you become significantly less full of shit. Ironically, you become kinder and more generous. Because now you're not lying to yourself anymore. You're not lying to yourself that it's about anyone else but you.

How's that for an awakening?

[PlayOnWords]

Pretty much.

[ivankiss]

Just to be clear... I am not trying to promote assholness, chaos and mayhem. I'm not saying you should go and step over everyone and everything to fulfil your selfish agendas.

No.

Be respectful. Be decent. Don't get nasty unless there is no other way out.

Just don't bullshit yourself. Don't lie to yourself about your motives. That's the message.

[Hojo]

I've tried to think of acts that are not selfish and have only heard of  jumping on a grenade to save your buddies in war. But even that could be considered selfish is you did deep enough. Maybe jumping on a grenade to save the enemies lives lol which is kinda what Jesus did. I think he was just upset at how badly it hurt I don't think its selfish to not want to be tortured

Edited July 20, 2023 by Hojo

[Guest Bazooka Jesus]

1 hour ago, ivankiss said:

Just to be clear... I am not trying to promote assholness

Pffff, you have never experienced an authentic Asshole Awakening... only Leo himself knows what it means to truly be an ASSHOLE.

[Ajax]

No. I care deeply for humanity. I can’t agree with that. I know that the stronger I am, the stronger I can be of service of humanity. The betterment of humanity is one of my main goals.

Here is the definition of selfish from Meriam-Webster “ concerned excessively or exclusively with oneself : seeking or concentrating on one's own advantage, pleasure, or well-being without regard for others”

I continually have high regard for others and go out of my way to have regard for others.  I will not consider myself “selfish”. That is false.

[Ajax]

2 minutes ago, Vibes said:

If you are empathetic when you see other suffering you suffer for them as if their suffering is yours.

Isn't it selfish to want their suffering to end (since you suffer together)?

I see each and every person as a person with infinite potential. Their suffering is not my suffering. They are creating their own suffering. The more I learn to increase my abilities, the more I can help others escape the traps of their own creation.  My issue with selfish is that it is a limiting concept. It's not only me, its "me and+++..."

 

[Breakingthewall]

Yah, I'm selfish because I'm everything. I just want to dive in myself. Nothing else matters because nothing else exist. 

[Schizophonia]

Yeah, everything is basically selfish, from A to Z.

[ivankiss]

If you care, you care because of your values, your ethics and morals, your beliefs, etc. And that's the part that's selfish. It's sneaky and it goes unnoticed, but it's there. 

If you had other values, beliefs, etc, you would be selfish in some other way.

Your intentions might be good. I'm not questioning that. I'm just saying you're doing it all for yourself, even if it might seem as if it's for others. You just don't understand yourself enough yet to see this clearly.

And I'm not even going into "there is no other" territory. I'm just saying, very often we try to help ourselves through others. By seemingly helping them. Often we want to achieve great change, somewhere out there, when really, what we want and need is a change within ourselves.

I'm also not pulling the "you're projecting your issues onto the world" card, but yes, yes you are. Big time.

Edited July 20, 2023 by ivankiss

[ZzzleepingBear]

Selfishness can be a very limiting and self punishing concept if you get to attached to the idea of moral purity of some sort.

 

You may be selfish in various ways, and it's good to try to acknowledge how or why that is. But that is also a individual maturity process that usually require self reflection, and that takes time.

To be a "selfish fuck" is as you can see, putting a certain value on what selfishness is to you at the moment. It is putting a bit of a negative spin on it. When really, selfishness is mainly a call for some self-reflection. It can be considered good if you want it, and bad if you resist it. In the end, it can benefit both yourself and others when consciously engaged with it.

 

Self care is for example both selfish from one point of view, but also of benefit to those around them. So it's a bit of a double bind for the mind as you can see. In the end, selfishness is quite a useful consept, and nothing to feel bad about if that happen to be the case.

[lostingenosmaze]

There is such a thing as true selflessness and that's called being dead ?

[Ajax]

5 hours ago, ivankiss said:

If you care, you care because of your values, your ethics and morals, your beliefs, etc. And that's the part that's selfish. It's sneaky and it goes unnoticed, but it's there. 

If you had other values, beliefs, etc, you would be selfish in some other way.

Your intentions might be good. I'm not questioning that. I'm just saying you're doing it all for yourself, even if it might seem as if it's for others. You just don't understand yourself enough yet to see this clearly.

And I'm not even going into "there is no other" territory. I'm just saying, very often we try to help ourselves through others. By seemingly helping them. Often we want to achieve great change, somewhere out there, when really, what we want and need is a change within ourselves.

I'm also not pulling the "you're projecting your issues onto the world" card, but yes, yes you are. Big time.

Selfish is a label or an appraisal that someone gives to you. It is a way of judging you and telling you who you are. I don’t agree with that one bit. I define who I am not other people. I decide why I do something, not other people.

Selfish is a false appraisal that serves no value and does not explain what I do and why I do it. It does not establish what is excessive or exclusive concern. It does not determine what is the deciding factor of what constitutes a disregard for other people.

Selfish is a bullshit concept. It has no value for me in either a self-development or spiritual development context.

Am I to agree that I am selfish because some black words on a screen tell me that I am? Lol, nope. Not today. I know I am more than that, much more. Much more. So are you, my friend. Don't let people confuse you and tell you that you are a nobody. Don't let people say you are Autistic or strange or creepy or narcissistic. You are who you say you are, not who people say you are. 

LOVE

[Javfly33]

I accept it, but because is not bad to be selfish. Is inherent to God incarnating a particular form ??

[UnbornTao]

It's huge!

As a culture we like to pretend that we're not that selfish. Culture couldn't be based on selfishness.

Don't turn it into a bad thing -- or good either.

[Hojo]

god is selfish it spends all day dreaming of itself

Edited July 21, 2023 by Hojo

[SourceCodo]

Yeah, oh well

Edited July 23, 2023 by SourceCodo

[Yimpa]

3 hours ago, Hojo said:

god is selfish it spends all day dreaming of itself

You can still expand your Sense Of Self.

.S.O.S.

[caspex]

Yeah, it's so important to realize you are very selfish. Only then can you really begin to be significantly less selfish.

And it's not bad to be selfish, selfishness is what allows you to stay limited, stay you. It's just as selfish to judge selfishness.

[Princess Arabia]

To be human is to be selfish. There's no way around it. If you consider yourself a separate being, then you have no choice but to be selfish. Even if you are helping people, you are doing it because it makes YOU feel good about yourself. God is SELFLESS because it has NO SELF. It is everything. Now, how you define "selfish", is up to you. People define it differently. That's where the controversy lies. @Lila9 you make a good point; but have you considered they only care about those things because it makes them feel good. It's still about them. Survival of the Self = Selfishness.