Leo how do I overcome past trauma ?

[Rishabh R]

Any sources , will therapy help? as I am working with the therapist and therapist told that what those girls did to me was extreme as no one deserves to be treated that badly as they treated me. When will your mind course release ?like @Leo Gura please release it soon . Can positive psychology and optimism help me ? And Leo you talk about taking responsibility for situations but I am confused as my therapist said me that if someone mistreated you then that is the choice that they are making and they are responsible for it ? - Is this a healthy way to take responsibility? My therapist also told me to write a forgiveness letter expressing my emotions and later throw it . Also I saw on wikihow's article to how to move on from heartbreak and one of the points was to challenge my negative thoughts and assumptions like - I will not get a girlfriend and replace it with - Is it really true? I don't know the future ( which I also know to be true but not able to apply in life practically). Who knows I will meet someone new in the future.

 

 

[Leo Gura]

Therapy is good for that.

Healing truama is about reliving the old experiences with consciousness until you understand them so deeply that they stop having an effect on you.

Therapy helps with that but psychedelics are even better.

Yes, forgiveness is good. But don't do it too soon, before you've consciously relived the trauma.

Of course you can get a girlfriend. That's not a thing worth doubting.

Edited July 12, 2023 by Leo Gura

[Rishabh R]

So I am doing right by seeing a therapist ?

[Leo Gura]

Just now, Rishabh R said:

So I am doing right by seeing a therapist ?

Probably. Psychedelics would speed up and deepen the process.

[Rishabh R]

And like the people who are dating in college , smoking cigerette, being abusive are wasting their precious time as I am the one of few people's in college who is single and is not smoking , also I had a junk food and jerking off addiction which I am working on and haven't done these addictions since 11 days(I am not boasting ). And my friends troll me , laugh at me for watching Actualized.org and they tell that I am doing a fraud by refusing to eat junk food and they are calling you a psychedelic addict . Could you explain me in relation to the episode that what kind of avoidance of truth mechanism is within them? And also me which is causing me to feel bad ? Will facing truth make me happy ? By the way how can I be hopeful that I can get a girlfriend ? And also I don't smoke cigerette , generally don't abuse others.

Edited July 12, 2023 by Rishabh R

[StarStruck]

Trauma is a mechanism of the body to keep you alive.
 

For example if you got attacked by a wolf and you barely survived it is good to remember your lessons and your mistakes dealing with wolves but if you have panic attacks every time you are in the Forrest it is an out of proportion response. 

Trauma healing is proving to the body that the past is in the past. For me meditation and magic truffels did wonders.  Talk therapy was almost totally useless for me. 

[Rishabh R]

@StarStruck ok but how were other therapies to you ?

[StarStruck]

3 minutes ago, Rishabh R said:

@StarStruck ok but how were other therapies to you ?

You should try all therapies until you find something that works for you. What worked for me might not work for you. 

[Rishabh R]

@StarStruck ok.

[OBEler]

Take psychedelics many many times, be strategic about dosing. Take all the good ones: lsd mushroom ketamin Mdma 5 meo dmt, lsd, 5meo malt, dpt, 5 meo mipt. Each one will address your trauma in it's unique way

[Rishabh R]

@OBEler sorry but psychedelics are banned in my country (India).

[Schizophonia]

4 minutes ago, Rishabh R said:

@OBEler sorry but psychedelics are banned in my country (India).

Psychedelics are banned everywhere and it's actually definitely easier to get them in India.

 

10 minutes ago, OBEler said:

Take psychedelics many many times, be strategic about dosing. Take all the good ones: lsd mushroom ketamin Mdma 5 meo dmt, lsd, 5meo malt, dpt, 5 meo mipt. Each one will address your trauma in it's unique way

I am going to have N M DMT, is it effective?

[Rishabh R]

Is there any drug or psychedelic legal in India . By the way I am already on antidepressants.

[ItsNick]

Psychedelic-Assisted Therapy (with MDMA specifically) with someone who knows what they're doing is gold. There are some great guides here in the Netherlands. But such great resources might not be available elsewhere.

Otherwise finding a great trip sitter will work too. Especially when dealing with difficult trauma and if you're inexperienced a trip sitter will be helpful.

Also consider breathwork and the various types that exist to release trauma from the body. Potentially with a guide as well. I also have an old post about releasing trauma from the body long term which might be helpful:

Wishing you the best! <3

[Rishabh R]

@ItsNick thank you both but I don't have psychedelics available to me.

@DefinitelyNotARobot

[Leo Gura]

@Rishabh R Holotropic Breathing is powerful. Look into workshops near you.

[Rishabh R]

@Leo Eckl sorry by mistake I tagged you. @Leo Gura But I am already seeing a therapist and she told me to do focussed breathing . As per trauma she told me to write a letter to those girls in which you express your emotions to her and at the end forgive them . And then either burn or throw the letter in the dustbin . By the way how can I be optimistic that I will get get a girlfriend cause I try to make eye contact with girls every time I go out and few girls look me in eyes. Also I talk to girls?

[Leo Gura]

6 minutes ago, Rishabh R said:

 I try to make eye contact with girls every time I go out and few girls look me in eyes.

This is a mistake. You should not look for such signs from girls but rather approach and flirt regardless of what they do.

Learn and practice proper pickup theory.

Read some books about how to heal trauma. Here's Teal Swan's book: https://amzn.to/3ruWDYa

Edited July 13, 2023 by Leo Gura

[Rishabh R]

So , @Leo Gura approaching is more powerful than eye contact but a few girls were constantly looking in me in eyes and we were making eye contact. When I approached a girl in college besides 55 girls she first talked to me nicely but from behind her boyfriend came and abused me , threatened me and told me to leave that campus so what can I do to prevent this from happening again ?

[Leo Gura]

9 minutes ago, Rishabh R said:

threatened me and told me to leave that campus so what can I do to prevent this from happening again ?

Stop caring and approach whoever you feel like unless police tell you to leave.

You have to practice being strong and not letting others dissuade you from your goals.

Edited July 13, 2023 by Leo Gura