polygamous relationship for spiritual growth?

[Jannes]

I recently heard a podcast of a person talking about polygamous relationships where a women talked about her experience from being a "normal" monogamous kind of person who had lots of problems with jealousy to becoming a polygamous person through a few years. 

What I found very interesting is that you can grow to be a polygamous kind of person. Often people demonize polygamous relationships because they can't believe that you can deal with the jealousy that your partner has sex or feels love for other people (polygamous can about sex or love) if you are connected with your emotions. But through years of work the person in the podcast reported you can steadily loose your jealousy. Starting with baby steps like talking with your partner who you find attractive. The person in the interview said that it's very rough emotional work and there is a shitton of talking with your partner about jealousy that you have to do and that you make contact with your most inner demon but that you can learn to deal with the jealousy. Over time you loose much of your jealousy. Not all but most of it. And people even report that they feel way safer in polygamous relationships probably because its not as manipulative, honest, the fear of cheating isnt there... 

Polygamous relationships hold together because partner feel a very unique form of love towards each other which other people can't replace. Even if they feel romantic feelings towards other people it's a different form of love and therefore has no competition. 

All the insights you get about your ego, all the letting go you have to do, all the facing of your own fears and limitations and surrendering to that in conversations, all the conscious suffering through jealousy you have to do... honestly this sounds like a cleaning, spiritual journey.

Just the fact that it takes a shitton of maturity to maintain a polygamous relationship and that it is way closer to truth because both partner are not repressing their thoughts and intentions makes me think that it makes your more conscious. 

 

Edited July 8, 2023 by Jannes

[Salvijus]

It's just like having multiple friends but with less boundaries

Edited July 8, 2023 by Salvijus

[Salvijus]

To love everyone fully and not to be attached to anyone. That's a quality of an enlightened Christ. If you carefully think about it, that is also the idea of polygamy at least in theory. But in practice idk, seems potentially dangerous route. You'd have to be really concious being probably to make it work.

Edited July 8, 2023 by Salvijus

[Jannes]

9 minutes ago, Salvijus said:

To love everyone and not to be attached to anyone. That's a quality of an enlightened Christ. If you carefully think about it, that is also the idea of polygamy at least in theory. But in practice idk, seems potentially dangerous route.

Yeah at least in theory it's way more holistic than monogamous relationships. What people make of it is another question tho. 

I also fear that it could potentially destroy my ability to trust or to feel exclusive to other people. But maybe that's just my monogamous conditioning...

What's important for these relationships to work is that people regularly have "100%" honest conversations with each other about how they feel about the situation. All the decisions should happen out of consent. You can close the relationship if that's the vibe or allow more freedom if that's the vibe. 

So a person with high conscientiousness and meticulousness is probably key. 

I am speaking like an expert about it but I didn't even experience a polygamous relationship ever, oops 

[toasty7718]

1 hour ago, Salvijus said:

It's just like having multiple friends but with less boundaries

This made me laugh in real life 

[Salvijus]

5 hours ago, Jannes said:

What's important for these relationships to work is that people regularly have "100%" honest conversations with each other about how they feel about the situation.

Yeah 

4 hours ago, toasty7718 said:

This made me laugh in real life