Is Rejection Personal?

[mr_engineer]

There are two broad camps - one camp saying 'It's not personal, don't take it personally, there are plenty of fish in the sea'. And, the other camp is 'It absolutely is personal, it is your fault, you suck, you're an absolute pathetic cuck loser weakling worthless piece of trash and I'm gonna show you how to not be an absolute piece of trash'. (Isn't it fun to be a man these days?!)

Here's what I've found - it depends on the person rejecting you. More to the point, it depends on whether they prioritize relationships or not. If they prioritize relationships, it is personal. If they don't prioritize relationships, it's not. 

When people would say 'Don't take it personally, it's not personal', it never made sense to me. Because, when I rejected people, it absolutely was personal! It was something about them that was incompatible, which is why I would reject them. It's only now that I see that it depends on the priority-structure of the person doing the rejecting. 

If you are reading this and you consider yourself an 'incel', here's the reality - all of the mirroring that incels get assumes that the people rejecting you prioritize relationships and consider relationships as important. What 'don't be entitled' means, is that you can't expect others to like you if you don't shower, you aren't hygienic and you don't have the basics handled. What 'it's your fault' means is that you're not doing enough to be liked. Now, if you are doing enough to be liked and you still don't get results, here's what isn't said - the reason for that is that those specific individuals don't prioritize relationships. They're not even thinking about dating you when they see you, and it's not because you lack in attractiveness. It's because they're not thinking about dating when they see anyone, period. 

A very big reason I don't respect players/PUAs giving advice online is that they're wrong about this. The assumption is that it's your fault. When you hear someone share their opinion about this, ask yourself 'How much does this person prioritize relationships? Are relationships a priority for this person?' A lot of times, for players and PUAs, the answer is 'no'. Why should you trust someone who is wrong about something as important as why women reject you?! 

Edited July 8, 2023 by mr_engineer

[NoSelfSelf]

Its not the problem of you getting rejected is after that you reject yourself!

You are the one then basing other persons likes(they didnt have a chance to get the know you in more depth) and what they find attractive(also your initial approach)...as valid point.

Then you come to a conclusion you are bad somethings wrong with you queastioning your game etc. That's what hurts you.

Also could be that you know yourself you are not interesting so it reinforces that because you havent worked on being interesting...

You cant be rejected if you dont reject yourself ,then its just someone saying no to you and that's their right to do so their day could be bad,bad experience with guys,you remind you of someone who cares what the thing is as long as you secure in who you are...

Similar to what @Princess Arabia said in Sensitive man post...

[MAHAVATAR_-_BABAJI]

On 7/8/2023 at 11:43 AM, mr_engineer said:

There are two broad camps - one camp saying 'It's not personal, don't take it personally, there are plenty of fish in the sea'. And, the other camp is 'It absolutely is personal, it is your fault, you suck, you're an absolute pathetic cuck loser weakling worthless piece of trash and I'm gonna show you how to not be an absolute piece of trash'. (Isn't it fun to be a man these days?!)

Here's what I've found - it depends on the person rejecting you. More to the point, it depends on whether they prioritize relationships or not. If they prioritize relationships, it is personal. If they don't prioritize relationships, it's not. 

When people would say 'Don't take it personally, it's not personal', it never made sense to me. Because, when I rejected people, it absolutely was personal! It was something about them that was incompatible, which is why I would reject them. It's only now that I see that it depends on the priority-structure of the person doing the rejecting. 

If you are reading this and you consider yourself an 'incel', here's the reality - all of the mirroring that incels get assumes that the people rejecting you prioritize relationships and consider relationships as important. What 'don't be entitled' means, is that you can't expect others to like you if you don't shower, you aren't hygienic and you don't have the basics handled. What 'it's your fault' means is that you're not doing enough to be liked. Now, if you are doing enough to be liked and you still don't get results, here's what isn't said - the reason for that is that those specific individuals don't prioritize relationships. They're not even thinking about dating you when they see you, and it's not because you lack in attractiveness. It's because they're not thinking about dating when they see anyone, period. 

A very big reason I don't respect players/PUAs giving advice online is that they're wrong about this. The assumption is that it's your fault. When you hear someone share their opinion about this, ask yourself 'How much does this person prioritize relationships? Are relationships a priority for this person?' A lot of times, for players and PUAs, the answer is 'no'. Why should you trust someone who is wrong about something as important as why women reject you?! 

You are seen a having a lower-status than her. It is an easy fix.

.

.

@NoSelfSelf My In person in-fields and dates are gold as I am quite charismatic.

Over the phone I am God awful. It's an area to fix. Every girl I lost was due to my texting game. 

Btw, why can't I reply to messages?

Edited July 9, 2023 by MAHAVATAR_-_BABAJI

[mr_engineer]

2 hours ago, MAHAVATAR_-_BABAJI said:

Its personal. Your game sucks. Fix that. 

I got rejected after making out with this girl. Said how she had so much fun. 1 bad text.. She won't respond now. She called me sus after I told her to block my number since she said "No, I am not going to get drinks with you", and turned down other proposals. Haha maybe I closed to early. Eh. That's 1 hot girl out of a billion better than her. 

This is the exact self-hatred I'm talking about, that's being sold to men these days. Anything goes wrong, 'it's your fault, you are to blame, because you're pathetic/weakling/loser/cuck/simp/worthless/piece of trash/little bitch/mIsOgYnIsTiC'. (Did I forget any other disparaging, insulting name that it's acceptable to call men these days? There is a special place in hell for every single person who enforces norms by using these terms, I hope that all of you burn in hell.) 

What if I told you, that if she's so fickle-minded that 1 text changes her mind, she doesn't value or prioritize relationships? That's not the psychology of someone who values and prioritizes relationships. Someone who values relationships gives you a fair chance and doesn't end things just because 'it's sus'. 

Edited July 9, 2023 by mr_engineer

[Roy]

Most rejection can't be personal, if they don't know you personally.

[NoSelfSelf]

@MAHAVATAR_-_BABAJI You have to be congruent over text same as face to face...

If you lame at texting you will be percieved as lame overall...

Same energy has to match over all things..

The approach,the date,the text..

If your approach is confident and on date you are not then it wont work,if you confident over text and not face to face also not working...

Edited July 9, 2023 by NoSelfSelf