Jailbreaking my mind from limiting beliefs, old narratives, and past traumas

[Revolutionary Think]

To start this off I'll say that my childhood experiences when I was turning 12 started to turn sour. My parents divorced and school was becoming a nightmare and a little too hard for me to take. Mind you at this stage in my life despite this happening I was one of the most agreeable people you could ever meet and I wasn't mean, doing the "wrong things", and hanging out with the wrong crowd in fact I was a bit of the loner type. I started being triangulated in my parents fights with both sides saying bad things about the other. I had no idea how to guide myself through life so I latched on to my dysfunctional school and family system for that. With all that being said I started to develop yearnings and redemptions fantasies. Most of my fantasies were about giving speeches that were so amazing and eloquent that they made me rich and famous and everyone would know my name and what I'm trying to do. I yearned to fly planes and helicopters and to travel the world do amazing things with science and such. I hated pop culture and sports things like that. I lived in Bel Air a place inaccessible by anything other than driving and had to rely on my mother for rides and ironically I didn't have a car or really learn to drive until my mid-twenties. Eventually I started doing better in school and eventually University. By the time I went job hunting though I got rejection after rejection after rejection that killed my confidence and I looked at those big dreams I had while being rejected for very simple jobs. I grew bitter and resentful at my family, my schooling, and my entire city. The bitterness and resentment just kept growing and growing and growing inside of me. I started posting things online about my life and how much it sucked. I had this rescue fantasy that I would be rescued and I looked at my family and my schooling and constantly complained about it online and with other people. Thinking this stupid school family and society owes me these MFers. 

That was the old me and this is the new me. The new me came into being after the pandemic when the first job I applied to I got, then the second and at that second job I quit it because it was toxic and unaligned with my goals. I started to question the lenses and the frames of my past and thin anew. I walked by a high rise building and the old me would think nothing much of it. I asked a question in my head what if I just wanted to look at a room in there I went in with confidence and was given a chance to see a room on the top floor and I loved the view and recoding it. For years I'd avoid Downtown LA because I just remember being there and being bored with my dad's Jewelry store I went back there with fresh eyes and a fresh perspective and got to meet someone in the airline industry and said I was interested in maybe a job and I got his contact information just in case. Last but, not least this just happened Yesterday I thought to myself how powerful it would be since I loved airplanes to just go to LAX for no other reason than just being around that area. I went to In N Out burger and watched the planes landing on the runway it was pretty cool. Then I did something pretty courageous having my car parked there I walked all the way to the airport wondering if there was pedestrian access and there was. Then I just went a big mall in Culver City and decided to buy my friends mom a gift. I know it may not seem like much to maybe someone who reads this but, for me I am breaking out of these old frames of my past and living my life more spontaneously and open to opportunites. My mind isn't latched on to "my family" or "my school" betraying me or I am owed something for all those past events etc. I dropped all of that in favor of being the master of my own destiny, the captain of my own ship, and the pilot of my own plane. I am no longer bound by all this negative thinking patterns that tell me I can't do something or something has to be put together in a perfect way before I do it. Life is more uplifting and exciting in this new mind frame. My confidence and happiness is really going up and I take more calculated risks instead of just shrinking into a corner with resentment and frustration. My vibe is also attracting my tribe. Thanks for reading this and I am excited for what the future holds.