I hate women because of too much negative experience

[luqqzr]

@Chives99 Good question, I can't remember who told me that I was worthless. I'm going to think about this.

If I can find that out I'll try to see the reason behind why they said this and forgive them if I can... 

[luqqzr]

@NoSelfSelf Childish, but thanks for trying to help. I still appreciate your effort.

[NoSelfSelf]

@luqqzr Its childish to you for someone knowing their boundary when to stop talking with someone,something really off here,no problem my ways are too direct its not for everybody...

[Chives99]

@luqqzr sounds like your projecting this resentment of mistreatment of others onto women beacuse you believe you'll be good enough if you get a loving relationship , but it never ends because you arent fixing the root, perhaps you think other guys are better than you because they have a girlfriend. You dont know their story however they might have  a million and one problems you dont and their relationship might be toxic behind closed doors. So many men beat their partners , they certainly arent better than you, resorting to violence is such a heavy low.

[luqqzr]

8 minutes ago, NoSelfSelf said:

@luqqzr Im done here good luck hating women and being with them ?

@NoSelfSelf No, this sentence was just childish.

[NoSelfSelf]

@luqqzr You having this hate will affect how you behave with them so i said good luck it will be tough they will sense it ..

[luqqzr]

@Chives99 I guess I started thinking that people are worth more when they are in relationships or good with women from the beginning of my teenage years, where all of my friends had fun with girls on partys etc. and I was the shy socially awkward kid that was not as social as them because I played too much video games and was on social media all day. So most of the time I was standing alone somewhere and didn't know how to behave. My parents never taught me how to be social. That's what I had to learn by myself through therapy and now coaching. Until the age of 18 it was impossible for me to even look people in the eyes, I didn't know how to do it, it felt weird, I didn't know it was important, it was not even possible for me to do with my family or best friends. they even made fun of me then because of that and because I was always "skin picking" on my face, it was brutal... they had a group chat only talking shit about me, when I found out I confronted them, talked about it and now we're all still best friends. Now I can talk to strangers without any problems, skin picking is gone and much more.

So yeah, I still think that being in a relationship is worth more than not being in one, maybe even because my parents always pressured me, wanted me to finally have a girlfriend... but I think that's normal.

So does it make sense to stop thinking that people in relationships are worth more? And why exactly should I stop thinking like this, how can I rationalize this? My mind still sees some kind of logic behind this. It's obvious for example that women are more attracted to men who are already in relationships... there are many reasons for this.

Edited June 19, 2023 by luqqzr

[luqqzr]

@NoSelfSelf I know, that's why I created this whole post.

[integral]

1 hour ago, luqqzr said:

You say that I can't expect her to have sex with me because I've done much personal development work, but why can she expect that everyone wants to fuck her just because she looks good? In my opinion this is extremely unfair and that's what I hate about society.

Aren't you cherry picking and creating a ideology over an hand full of low quality people? There are plently of woman on the other end of the bell curve that arent full of shit. Got to balance out the world view and see the entire landscape.

A woman's worth is her beauty if that's what you value. I dont so to me she is a 0/10.

Beauty isnt fair thats true, life isnt fair, beauty makes it so your liked by people alot easier, youll get hired and make more money with less effort, youll even be smarter because people gave you more attention when you where a kid, youll be far more successful at marketing if your face has to do with the brand like social media, youll likely have better social skills on top off all that. 

Annnnnd why does this matter to you? Are you unhappy the world isnt exactly as you want it to be?

Happiness is to accept reality exactly the way it is.

Edited June 19, 2023 by integral

[luqqzr]

@integral I just talked to a friend and realized that I'm giving society way too much power over me. I thought it was only women, but it's society in general.

As you just said: I'm unhappy that the world isn't exactly as I want it to be.

This seems to be the whole issue. And yes I know that I have to accept reality as it is. Because it is what it is. What I can create or change as a human has limitations.

So, stupid question... is there any particular way that I cannot see to accept reality, women, society etc. exactly the way as they are or "Just do it?"

[Chives99]

57 minutes ago, luqqzr said:

@Chives99 I guess I started thinking that people are worth more when they are in relationships or good with women from the beginning of my teenage years, where all of my friends had fun with girls on partys etc. and I was the shy socially awkward kid that was not as social as them because I played too much video games and was on social media all day. So most of the time I was standing alone somewhere and didn't know how to behave. My parents never taught me how to be social. That's what I had to learn by myself through therapy and now coaching. Until the age of 18 it was impossible for me to even look people in the eyes, I didn't know how to do it, it felt weird, I didn't know it was important, it was not even possible for me to do with my family or best friends. they even made fun of me then because of that and because I was always "skin picking" on my face, it was brutal... they had a group chat only talking shit about me, when I found out I confronted them, talked about it and now we're all still best friends. Now I can talk to strangers without any problems, skin picking is gone and much more.

So yeah, I still think that being in a relationship is worth more than not being in one, maybe even because my parents always pressured me, wanted me to finally have a girlfriend... but I think that's normal.

So does it make sense to stop thinking that people in relationships are worth more? And why exactly should I stop thinking like this, how can I rationalize this? My mind still sees some kind of logic behind this. It's obvious for example that women are more attracted to men who are already in relationships... there are many reasons for this.

Who gives a fuck who women think are more attractive???? you are your own unique person which your own qualities, interests, quirks, etc Well done on making loads of progress on socialising keep at it by going to social events etc you say you can talk to loads of strangers now and make eye contact thats a big achievement. Your value isnt defined by how many people you've slept with or how many relationships you've had. The only people that brag about that dont have much going on in their life. Live your own life, chat to women, if you get a good vibe ask them out. Vibe is good because it isnt based on need and desperation its like a felt thing, you feel the chemistry between you. 83% of communication is non-verbal so if u feel like crap or are anxious, your body language will communicate that and they will pick up on that. Get out of your head and live your life. Have you considered therapy?

[Schizophonia]

Why do you go out with such rags?

Obviously, you are too attached to someone to not be alone.

Maybe that's your start down the rabbit hole of a whole new anti-political correctness paradigm, or maybe you're foolishly listening to the "bluepilled" who base most of their worldview on lies by omnission, especially on the question of their own privileges and condition in general.

will understand who can

Edited June 19, 2023 by Schizophonia

[integral]

31 minutes ago, luqqzr said:

@integral I just talked to a friend and realized that I'm giving society way too much power over me. I thought it was only women, but it's society in general.

As you just said: I'm unhappy that the world isn't exactly as I want it to be.

This seems to be the whole issue. And yes I know that I have to accept reality as it is. Because it is what it is. What I can create or change as a human has limitations.

So, stupid question... is there any particular way that I cannot see to accept reality, women, society etc. exactly the way as they are or "Just do it?"

Got to let go of judgment and moral superiority. Firstly you received 100x more then 50% of the population not born with your premium life conditions and you think your any better then who ever your judging? The thing with judgement is its a lack of dept of understanding of the various life conditions people receive and stage of development they are at. Its like judging a dog for pissing everywhere or shitting on the carpet. What did you expect they didn't receive a massive human brain! For some reason when we look at humans we compare our selves or are unable to see that we are not at all on the same level of development, but with animals its so obvious and we just don't judge them for it. Are you judging the mentally handicap for being born handicap, i bet your not, but your judging that brainless hot Instagram star? Shes not doing anything any different then anyone else, unconsciousness part of a lottery, her lack of self-development was inevitably part of her circumstances just like that handicap man or dog. She cant be any different then who she is, she did not receive an opportunity to, just like that dog, or handicap man. People are at different stages of development based on completely different life circumstances. Its no ones fault who they are. When someone commits a horrible crime, you look at his entire life up to that point, understand it, then lovingly put him in jail for that's the best course of action, hating what he did is ridiculous because it was inevitable if you understand how he got to that point, he had literally no opportunity to be different. A bear eating a human alive has no opportunity to be different, they where born that way. 

Edited June 19, 2023 by integral

[Schizophonia]

1 minute ago, integral said:

Got to let go of judgment and moral superiority. Firstly you received 100x more then 50% of the population not born with your premium life conditions and you think your any better then who ever your judging? The thing with judgement is its a lack of dept of understanding of the various life conditions people receive and stage of development they are at. Its like judging a dog for pissing everywhere or shitting on the carpet. What did you expect they didn't receive a massive human brain! For some reason when we look at humans we compare our selves or are unable to see that we are not at all on the same level of development, but with animals its so obvious and we just don't judge them for it. Are you judging the mentally handicap for being born handicap, i bet your not, but your judging that brainless hot Instagram star? Shes not doing anything any different then anyone else, unconsciousness part of a lottery, her lack of self-development was inevitably part of her circumstances just like that handicap man or dog. She cant be any different then who she is, she didnt not receive an opportunity to, just like that dog, or handicap man. 

The problem is having bought this dog.

[Chives99]

 

[luqqzr]

@Chives99 Yeah I gave women and society in general way too much control over me and what I think... crazy to see this, feels like a different personality now. Why the fuck did I give them so much power, I don't understand yet. Have to find out.

I already went to two psychologists, last year I've been to a psychosomatic clinic voluntarily for six weeks straight. Next time I see my psychologist I will talk to him about this topic. Might be interesting.

Thank you for telling me this, I think I finally understood that it doesn't matter at all what women think of me, what they think of relationships or what they think in general. Like... at all, not even a little bit. I just need to have fun, let others have their fun as well (no matter how stupid their activities look to me) and keep an eye open to find a compatible woman through that process.

[Jacob Morres]

I think the way we perceive things is mostly the issue rather than the things themselves. 

I think trauma healing could help a lot here 

 

[Chives99]

@luqqzr Love yourself, that will attract the right person

 

[something_else]

4 hours ago, luqqzr said:

Now I'm just annoyed when women are triggered by stupid stuff and react weird or act arrogant because they think they deserve the world but have done nothing for it. And what's sad is that they even get it, because many men just think with their dick. OnlyFans is the best example for this.

Plenty of people are born with things they didn’t have to work for. Many people are born into millionaire families.

The women who make money on OnlyFans are actually a pretty small percentage of women who look very hot or have unique fetish traits. Most girls make little or nothing.

You could easily have been born an ugly woman who has it far worse than an ugly man. At least an ugly man can increase his sexual value through status, money, charisma, and exercise.

Having to work for your results instead of being handed them is not always a curse.

Expecting everything to be fair is a always a huge curse that will make you miserable, as you are discovering now.

Really the fact that there are arrogant women out there who can get whatever they want from guys shouldn’t bother you because you don’t need to interact with them. Just ignore them. There are plenty of attractive girls who are not like that in the world. However the women who are high quality and developed are not going to go for someone who displays such disdain and hatred for them as you do so you should be aware of that too.

Edited June 19, 2023 by something_else

[Roy]

11 hours ago, luqqzr said:

So... enough crying, let me ask a goal oriented question: How can I accept this mean and unfair world? Or how can I change the way I think about the world? I'm missing positive experience with women.

It's not your fault. When you think about it it isn't rational at all to blame yourself or feel depressed, melancholy at worst for a better time in the past. It's not your fault our culture and society has enabled this. You need to be x4 better than most women before they'll be reliably attracted to you. We live in the most materialistic and hypergamous time in history. Of course you will be able to find sane, feminine, chill women to enjoy company with but they are rare in modern Western culture. You'll have to look for non-white, foreign women if you want to find them reliably.

You got most of it right anyways. Enjoy your life and live for yourself. If the right girl falls into place that's great, but don't go out of your way trying to find the perfect girl. What you get in return for the tremendous effort usually isn't worth it.

You'll be way more content just not giving a fuck and putting in little effort, because we all know they aren't.