How do I stop caring about missing things?

[BojackHorseman]

English is not my first language so hopefully the title is not misleading.

Basically, I mean, I've tried lots of different things in different domains, and also some that I've never tried and want to, but I'm getting quite old, and I'm feeling some kind of huge emotional pain thinking about the things I'm not doing, or those that I've decided to give up on.

I might be ADHD (self diagnosed but lots of signs), so hopping for one thing to another might be my curse, but as I'm getting old, it makes me wanna cry how I've accomplished nothing compared to people I know IRL or online that specialized in certain domains.

I'm also naturally not "gifted", not very smart, think to quick and I have terrilbe memory, so I really envy smart people.Me, I just know small bits of very trivial things, mostly pop culture, and a tiny bit of some arts like music, videomaking or drawing, but I suck at those.

I'm sorry, I'm noticing as I type that I don't know what I'm trying to ask here.

I guess I just feel bad that I'm halfway of my life and I don't feel like I can tell who I am, what I do. And the more it goes, the less energy in general I have so it's  not making it easier.

Edit : I forgot to mention children. Big FOMO here, but if one part of me wants to try and know I'd do my best, the other part knows that sometimes I can barely take care of myself and get overwhelmed at very small tasks so taking care of a baby...very risky. But the feeling of missing out on having children hits so, so hard...

Edited June 11, 2023 by BojackHorseman

[Sabth]

Idk when people my age are having children. Idk if I'm missing out. But I couldn't/ haven't even finish my degree so I couldn't step onto the next thing. I guess.  It would be totally weird if I'm married without having completed a degree.. so idk..

 

But I'm not doing it either. So idk

Edited June 12, 2023 by Sabth