How to get sexual and emotional needs met while single

[somegirl]

So I am right now still single and working on myself and healing until I meet the guy I would wanna be with.

Though I noticed I miss and crave great sex so much.

I can work on self-love, spend time with myself, give myself compliments, even hug myself, but I basically NEED someone to fullfill my sexual needs. So what can I do to compensate for that need I have while single?

P.s. Not into one night stands or having f buddies. 

[Roy]

Toys, porn, and self-exploration can satisfy the majority of your sexual needs if you are open-minded enough and comfortable with your own body.

As for emotional needs that is much harder without an intimate partner. You'll need to lean on your family and friends more as you won't have that close person to hear you out.

Appreciate and enjoy the time you have while you are single. Don't feel pressured to jump into the next thing or spend too much energy seeking it out impatiently. Think about the absolute freedom and space you have right now! You can fill it with so many awesome hobbies and interests.

[Raze]

Go herbivore mode, stop masturbating or looking at sexual things. 

[Rishabh R]

@somegirl Ya it happens with me too cause I am single too. Going to herbivore mode 1st hurts for a couple of days then it becomes mentally healthy.

[somegirl]

5 hours ago, Roy said:

Toys, porn, and self-exploration can satisfy the majority of your sexual needs if you are open-minded enough and comfortable with your own body.

Well porn is there, but tbh it just makes me depressed to watch it cause it reminds me that noone is beside me to do that with. It happened like every time I watch it, it just puts me into bad, negative mood. 

5 hours ago, Roy said:

As for emotional needs that is much harder without an intimate partner. You'll need to lean on your family and friends more as you won't have that close person to hear you out.

I can only behave like that towards myself. If it works. Cause I don't wanna bother friends. 

5 hours ago, Roy said:

Appreciate and enjoy the time you have while you are single. Don't feel pressured to jump into the next thing or spend too much energy seeking it out impatiently. Think about the absolute freedom and space you have right now! You can fill it with so many awesome hobbies and interests.

Yeah I know. 

It's just physical need that I crave... But I guess I should channel it through other things. 

[somegirl]

5 hours ago, Raze said:

Go herbivore mode, stop masturbating or looking at sexual things. 

What's herbivore mode?

[somegirl]

1 hour ago, Rishabh R said:

@somegirl Ya it happens with me too cause I am single too. Going to herbivore mode 1st hurts for a couple of days then it becomes mentally healthy.

Isn't it like surpressing?

[Chives99]

massage parlours and escorts are great if u want to get your rocks off, but it wont provide an emotional connection although you can chit chat with them to build social skills and have nice conversation.

[Chives99]

@Raze good luck with that

[somegirl]

1 hour ago, Judy2 said:

the way i see it, ideally, a friendship is mutually beneficial and all parties involved will gladly help meet each other's needs in one way or the other. you can help meet your friends' needs and they can help you meet yours.

The way I see it... I am sometimes embarassed to tell them the problems I am facing cause it seems like I am always the one having problems while they do not share any problems with me, making it seem like their life is perfect. 

1 hour ago, Judy2 said:

also, your social and physical needs are not something you can transcend so easily or satisfy by simply loving yourself more.

This is why I hate it. Like I cannkt be 100% independent. I have to rely on others for some aspects of my life...

1 hour ago, Judy2 said:

so i guess i would encourage you to find "external" rather than "internal" solutions in this particular case. it's something i am currently working on myself. finding friends you can emotionally connect with on a deeper level (and maybe cuddle) might already go a long way:)

Hmm. Yeah, for emotional needs that seems like a good advice. I can also talk to my current friend group, but currently I am kinda resentful towards them cause lately I statted disliking the way they have been behaving (always negative, complaining, victim mindset "oh poor me", whilst not doing anything to change their current situation). 

[somegirl]

17 minutes ago, Chives99 said:

massage parlours and escorts are great if u want to get your rocks off, but it wont provide an emotional connection although you can chit chat with them to build social skills and have nice conversation.

First time hearing about it. I don't think there is such place here where I live. It's a small town.

[somegirl]

9 hours ago, Roy said:

Toys

Maybe. 

[Chives99]

@somegirl can you not drive or use public transportation? you can find plenty of providers online

[somegirl]

9 minutes ago, Chives99 said:

can you not drive or use public transportation? you can find plenty of providers online

Can you briefly explain what is a massage parlour? And an escort? What they are supposed to do?

English is my second language. ?

Edited June 10, 2023 by somegirl

[somegirl]

8 minutes ago, Judy2 said:

besides, it's okay to value both. you can do your own thing without depending on other people's money, advice, opinions, approval, etc....while still appreciating their companionship, the emotional connection you can have with them, etc.

you don't have to fully depend on anyone, but you don't have to live completely independently either.

Yeah you said this amazingly. 

It's that balance.

[Raze]

8 hours ago, somegirl said:

What's herbivore mode?

There was a study that found women who didn’t masturbate or think about sex desired it less while single 

[integral]

11 hours ago, somegirl said:

So I am right now still single and working on myself and healing until I meet the guy I would wanna be with.

How are you going to meet him? If hes in reach go get him now. 

Edited June 10, 2023 by integral

[somegirl]

23 minutes ago, Raze said:

There was a study that found women who didn’t masturbate or think about sex desired it less while single 

Oh. Sounds promising.

Though I don't know cause I think about it all the time. Cause it's unfulfilled need of mine. I didn't have it as much as I wanted to in the past. 

[somegirl]

10 minutes ago, integral said:

How are you going to meet him? If hes in reach go get him now.

I have certain standards. It's not that simple. I can't just be with any guy, just because he's a guy. 

I can't have sex with just anyone, it needs to be with someone who would care and respect me too, who I also fulfills my standards.

Makes things more complicated, doesn't it? ??

How I'm gonna meet him? Have no clue. I gave up on thinking about that. 

Edited June 10, 2023 by somegirl

[integral]

15 minutes ago, somegirl said:

Makes things more complicated, doesn't it? ??

I think that makes it far less complicated! Poor standards is a nightmare. 

Edited June 10, 2023 by integral