How to deal with disrespect from a girl

[Spiral]

20 hours ago, StarStruck said:

I already had rapport with her for 3-4 hours times 3 encounters. It is not hard to respond to "hi what is up?", perhaps it is boring.. but still it is a matter of respect from my point of view. Perhaps you are right, she has pretty privilege and gets a lot of guys texting her. I need to work on my text game.

That’s a meaningless text. Imagine I send you an empty letter. Would you reply to that?

Texts should a serve a purpose. The only purpose that text shows is that you want her to acknowledge you. In other words it makes you come off as desperate.

With all this said. Of course she’s not girlfriend-material. It is after all disrespectful not to reply. 

[StarStruck]

1 hour ago, Spiral said:

That’s a meaningless text. Imagine I send you an empty letter. Would you reply to that?

I would ask you what you wanted to say.

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Texts should a serve a purpose. The only purpose that text shows is that you want her to acknowledge you. In other words it makes you come off as desperate.

With all this said. Of course she’s not girlfriend-material. It is after all disrespectful not to reply. 

I think it is just a way for me to start a conversation by asking how the other person is doing but I do get your point. I could be more emotionally spiking.

 

3 hours ago, puporing said:

This is maybe only true with very immature people who fall into this manipulation. Not so with mature and developed ones, the exact opposite happens.

I think if you felt hurt by the lack of response, you should just speak up about it one way or another, it may well fall on deaf ears but to me it's healthy to express that (and then move on). I know it can seem like too much if you haven't done it much before, but  what you gotta lose?

It's good to practice expressing your feelings about a disrespectful situation (to the extent you're comfortable), and then set boundaries for it, because it will come up again and again not just dating but work, people in general. 

I might try this with a different girl, somebody who acknowledges my existence. ?

I'm just too nice sometimes and people don't appreciate niceness when they get it without earning it. Especially high value girls who get niceness thrown at them all the time. I don't judge her and I get her. So I don't even have frustration towards her. I have to respect her feminine nature but that doesn't mean I will put any attention on her the next time I see her: I will ignore her and just let her be, let her be in her nature. There are already other girls who appreciate who I'm so I'm not desperate. I opened this thread to learn about myself, not to get her..

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It boils down to Self-Love, which affects your ability to be your best self around others who will appreciate what you give them (as presence, attention, etc) and not treat it like nothing.

(And in the end... I still suggest to wake up instead of this endless chasing because in my experience it never made me feel whole or loved. Build authentic relationships instead. I've done a fair share of "chasing" myself before and know what that's like, it's really not that great for most people. I was quite literally spinning on a "hamster wheel" but in reality I was looking for God's Love. And you are probably not going to find the kind of LOVE and HEALING you crave except from God or "works of God". If you're more "sensitive" like me it is just adding more trauma dealing with immature or insensitive people that are not yet attuned to their feelings. Sorry if I am going off tangent, but no one else is gonna tell you how it actually is with regards to "chasing the other" and God more than likely.. and don't have to take my word I am just trying to help you out coz I am sensing that you may be ready to hear it).

You are not going off tangent, I already knew this and I'm working on Self-Love. How I see social interactions are like this: social interactions are just human games. It could be compared to chess or any other game. And since I'm seeing it as a game I have become better at it by not taking it personally. If I make a wrong move, it just means that it is an opportunity to learn about my Self. There are couple of girls who are chasing me but they aren't as attractive as I want them to be but that just means I have to up my game, instead of chasing.

12 hours ago, integral said:

Did you ask her out yet? 

No, I don't want to.

Edited June 3, 2023 by StarStruck

[NoSelfSelf]

@StarStruck You are disrespecting her with saying hi what's up ?

This is like red pill,you saying women are disrespecting and for the streets,in meantime not seeing what you doing no self awarness...

Edited June 3, 2023 by NoSelfSelf

[StarStruck]

5 minutes ago, NoSelfSelf said:

@StarStruck You are disrespecting her with saying hi what's up ?

This is like red pill you saying women are disrespecting and for the streets and not seeing what you doing...

I read this like 3 times and I didn't understand what you were trying to say. ?

[NoSelfSelf]

@StarStruck Corrected 

[puporing]

8 hours ago, StarStruck said:

How I see social interactions are like this: social interactions are just human games. It could be compared to chess or any other game. And since I'm seeing it as a game I have become better at it by not taking it personally.

Not if you can find authentic people, and okay with being alone for periods of time.. they are out there but just harder to find in general, maybe spiritual retreats or something. They're just not your "flashy types" usually. In any case, if you want it to be a game then it will be so, if you wish not to then you will find people who are also aligned similarly, depends what you prioritize. idk I have like zero interest in unnecessary drama and would rather be "alone" these days than deal with that, and it doesn't bother me. I am much happier alone or with people on similar maturity level just coz of awakening work and have no room for bullshit . My mind won't allow it it will just repel it "on my behalf". Ultimately up to you though. I think it's one of those things you have to find out for yourself when you're truly tired of the superficiality.

Edited June 3, 2023 by puporing