Is life supposed to be easy or difficult?

[Someone here]

I welcome all your thoughts .but probably I'm looking for opinions of people who are 30 years old or above (because they have more in depth experience with life ). You know ..I'm a young man and I wanna know what's waiting ahead of me down the road. 

 

Is life fundamentally easy or difficult? And why do I tend to believe that it's difficult?  I also have a belief that life is unfair ..you have some people who are just born in a wealthy family and they live completely carelessly and piss their time away in whatever way they want . And you have people who literally work 12 hours a day just to put bread on the table . Why is that ? Is it 'karma '? Why are some people lucky witth the 'genetic lottery' and they are physically attractive (whether they are men or women )? And other people are less attractive  .

Dunno ..just felt I would empy out some of this stuff 

[Lila9]

I don't think that I have to be 30 or older in order to have a meaningful insight about this particular thing you are talking about. 

Generally speaking, we can say that being alive compared to being dead is more difficult. 

I believe that we all consciously chose to be here and to experience 'life' for the sake of the experience (and maybe some other mysterious purposes, who knows?)

I can't say that life is more difficult than easy though. I think that life is both difficult and easy. 

The problem with our minds is that we are taking for granted the easy aspects of life, we don't appriciate enough what we were blessed with, we many times are too focused on the difficult parts and situations, on the struggles, on what is not working.

Then, we add more resistance to it because it's contradicts the image of the easy and happy life we want, which is resulted in even more difficult life. Then we say that life is difficult, what a difficult life. We complain a lot.

I don't think that life is inherently difficult, but life is counter intuitive and mysterious which might give the feeling that life is difficult.

Yes, there are basic survival challenges that every living creature has to bear, but I think that many times we underestimate how much our minds create lots of unnecessary suffering in our lives. Our thoughts, our beliefs, our judgements, our own bullshit. Our social complex and strange norms and structures also create a lot of suffering.

Our curiosity makes us restless, our drive to know, to create stories when we don't know, because our mind can't tolerate uncertainty and mystery.

Yet, we have control on making our lives easier. We can program our mind to tolerate uncertainty and even enjoy it, we can surrender to the need to know to feel safe and start to trust our inner wisdom, our intuition more, we can give up on beliefs that are not contributing to us and replace them with healthier beliefs, we can stop believe to our thoughts so much, we can start to accept difficulty and pain as a normal part of life, we can improve our personal resilience, we can avoid toxic people and toxic relationships which weaken us and build healthy relationships, we can raise our awarness, we can do lots of things, lots of modifications to prevent unnecessary suffering.

 

 

 

 

[Leo Gura]

No one has ever had an easy life. This notion is a joke.

[Thought Art]

@Leo Gura

[Leo Gura]

Life is an elastic thing that always becomes as difficult as you can handle or worse.

[Thought Art]

@Leo Gura Life has a lot of ugliness to it for me. 

Lots of beauty too.

It's very hard.

Me being the fool I am I have made it harder than it really needed to be.

Ideally my suffering will make me into a man who is wise and avoids a lot of this stuff for most of my life.

I am reading Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl. I've got it easy.

Edited May 13, 2023 by Thought Art

[Willie]

Life is what you make of it with the hand you were dealt. It’s a game of luck and skill.

[Extreme Z7]

For first-world environments, Life is Hard
For third-world environments + the animal kingdom, Life is Hardcore

[puporing]

something to consider: the difficulty might be to help you graduate from this level of consciousness altogether.

[StarStruck]

Life is like a box of cookies

[Someone here]

9 hours ago, Lila9 said:

Generally speaking, we can say that being alive compared to being dead is more difficult. 

Why do you think that is ?

9 hours ago, Lila9 said:

I believe that we all consciously chose to be here and to experience 'life' for the sake of the experience (and maybe some other mysterious purposes, who knows?)

How do you know? 

9 hours ago, Lila9 said:

The problem with our minds is that we are taking for granted the easy aspects of life, we don't appriciate enough what we were blessed with, we many times are too focused on the difficult parts and situations, on the struggles, on what is not working.

Then, we add more resistance to it because it's contradicts the image of the easy and happy life we want, which is resulted in even more difficult life. Then we say that life is difficult, what a difficult life. We complain a lot.

Self fulfilling prophecy. 

9 hours ago, Lila9 said:

Yes, there are basic survival challenges that every living creature has to bear, but I think that many times we underestimate how much our minds create lots of unnecessary suffering in our lives. Our thoughts, our beliefs, our judgements, our own bullshit. Our social complex and strange norms and structures also create a lot of suffering.

Our curiosity makes us restless, our drive to know, to create stories when we don't know, because our mind can't tolerate uncertainty and mystery

So we should live just like animals? Without entertaining our mental facilities?  

9 hours ago, Lila9 said:

Yet, we have control on making our lives easier. We can program our mind to tolerate uncertainty and even enjoy it, we can surrender to the need to know to feel safe and start to trust our inner wisdom, our intuition more, we can give up on beliefs that are not contributing to us and replace them with healthier beliefs, we can stop believe to our thoughts so much, we can start to accept difficulty and pain as a normal part of life, we can improve our personal resilience, we can avoid toxic people and toxic relationships which weaken us and build healthy relationships, we can raise our awarness, we can do lots of things, lots of modifications to prevent unnecessary suffering.

 

Great ?.  Thanks. 

[Someone here]

9 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

No one has ever had an easy life. This notion is a joke.

Oh dear Leo..where were you absent man ?got me worried about you. 

Anyways..glad you are still doing good ,I suppose. 

Why so pessimistic though ? Does it have anything to do with your health problems? 

[Carl-Richard]

6 minutes ago, Someone here said:

Why so pessimistic though ? 

I can talk as somebody who comes from a very privileged background in terms of material things, yet I've suffered a lot. Things tend to balance themselves out.

[josemar]

9 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

No one has ever had an easy life. This notion is a joke.

 

11 minutes ago, Someone here said:

Why so pessimistic though ?

Noone has had an easy life. So be noone. 

"But Leo, my mind tells me all these things about reality, and since you're my idol and I'm a philosophy student I need to endlessly mentally masturbate"

Go on then.

[Someone here]

10 minutes ago, Carl-Richard said:

I can talk as somebody who comes from a very privileged background in terms of material things, yet I've suffered a lot. Things tend to balance themselves out.

What kind of suffering?  Would you mind sharing some of it ?

Also..do you make that classical distinction between pain and suffering? 

I was recently told by my therapist that while pain is inevitable and a part of life. suffering is a choice. I strongly disagree..suffering comes with pain and isn’t a choice at all.

I feel that by saying suffering is a choice.. you are saying that people who are suffering just aren’t trying hard enough to improve their situation or that they /want/ to be in the pain that they are in.

 

 

 

[Razard86]

10 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Life is an elastic thing that always becomes as difficult as you can handle or worse.

Some truth to this, but I'd say it's very misleading. 

 

1 hour ago, Carl-Richard said:

I can talk as somebody who comes from a very privileged background in terms of material things, yet I've suffered a lot. Things tend to balance themselves out.

This is more accurate from my perspective. 

Truthfully though, it really is just how you interpret it. I truly believe people who are born into privileged backgrounds live harder lives than people who aren't. If you can handle adversity well when you are younger and learn to appreciate and be content your life actually runs smoother than people who don't. Not because you may have more material success, but because you need very little to be content or appreciative.

It is much harder to be used to plenty and then have to go without that plenty, than to be used to little and gain only a little more in life. Why? Because the only barrier between you and the good life is your ability to handle loss. Easy or difficult is a relative interpretation based on your own perspective. 

In fact if you want an honest assessment of what you think the good life is ask yourself what you would buy, and what you would do if you inherited a BILLION dollars. Whatever comes to mind is what you actually want to do with your life. So then look where you are in relation to those aspirations and that will reveal your opinion on what grade you are currently giving yourself on how well you are living. Learn to be completely transparent with yourself. NO SECRETS!!

Edited May 13, 2023 by Razard86

[Carl-Richard]

1 hour ago, Someone here said:

What kind of suffering?  Would you mind sharing some of it ?

Anxiety, substance abuse.

 

1 hour ago, Someone here said:

Also..do you make that classical distinction between pain and suffering?

Pain is more concrete and immediate, suffering is more abstract and cyclical.

 

1 hour ago, Someone here said:

I was recently told by my therapist that while pain is inevitable and a part of life. suffering is a choice. I strongly disagree..suffering comes with pain and isn’t a choice at all.

I feel that by saying suffering is a choice.. you are saying that people who are suffering just aren’t trying hard enough to improve their situation or that they /want/ to be in the pain that they are in.

There are points to be made on both sides. There are many things largely outside your control, but some things can be said to be more under your control. For example, many substance addicts develop a self-destructive doom mindset: when things get hard, they revert to "fuck it, I don't care anyway" and it magnifies their problems 10x. A mindset like that is something you can change, and while it's not necessarily easy, it's a choice you can make. That doesn't mean it's 100% under your control. You can for example go to a therapist which will help you to make that choice.

Edited May 13, 2023 by Carl-Richard

[Someone here]

22 minutes ago, Carl-Richard said:

Anxiety, substance abuse.

I guess Alcohol?  Yeah that one is a bitch . Luckily I'm not the kind of person who will miss around with Alcohol. Cigarettes are more than  enough for me .

I also suffered from intense anxiety last year .now I see a therapist and I take SSRI’s and I'm completely healed .

24 minutes ago, Carl-Richard said:

Pain is more concrete and immediate, suffering is more abstract and cyclical.

 

What do you mean by "cyclical "?

27 minutes ago, Carl-Richard said:

There are points to be made on both sides. There are many things largely outside your control, but some things can be said to be more under your control. For example, many substance addicts develop a self-destructive doom mindset: when things get hard, they revert to "fuck it, I don't care anyway" and it magnifies their problems 10x. A mindset like that is something you can change, and while it's not necessarily easy, it's a choice you can make. That doesn't mean it's 100% under your control. You can for example go to a therapist which will help you to make that choice.

 

 think of it from a  Myth of Sisyphus perspective. It seems like if you believe suffering is a choice.. then you’d say :well.. we have to imagine sisyphus happy because he believes one day the rock  will stay at the top. He has found meaning in his task..so he does not suffer. But it’s not like he "chose" to be rolling the rock  every day . he has to. And if he couldn’t find meaning in the task..that’s not his fault.. is it? You can’t force yourself to not suffer. You don’t have control over these things.

I did some googling and it seems I am in the minority..most people agree that suffering is a choice. Can anyone here explain to me from a philosophical viewpoint why that is?

[Someone here]

40 minutes ago, Razard86 said:

In fact if you want an honest assessment of what you think the good life is ask yourself what you would buy, and what you would do if you inherited a BILLION dollars. Whatever comes to mind is what you actually want to do with your life. So then look where you are in relation to those aspirations and that will reveal your opinion on what grade you are currently giving yourself on how well you are living.

I like this ? 

[Lila9]

2 hours ago, Someone here said:

Why do you think that is ?

Because all the earthy stress that living people are dealing with is not relevant to the dead, like paying the bills, finding a partner, finding a job, food, shelter. There is no need for all of those behind the realm of life. Nothing is expected from the dead and nothing will happen if it won't eat or pay bills. 

2 hours ago, Someone here said:

How do you know? 

As I said, I believe

2 hours ago, Someone here said:

So we should live just like animals? Without entertaining our mental facilities?  

No, I'm pro healthy balance between the spirit and mind. I believe in a holistic approach. Both are important. The thing is that we live in an era when we put exaggerated empathize on our minds. Our minds and what they are generating should be questioned sometimes. Meta-questioning. 

I asked ChatGPT what it thinks about it and it said:

Quote

In general, this idea is a widely held belief that has been expressed by many philosophers, psychologists, and spiritual teachers throughout history. It is important to maintain a balance between the mind and spirit to lead a fulfilled life. Questioning our thoughts and beliefs is also an essential part of personal growth and development.