Am I a bad person for this?

[playdoh]

One day I was reading an interesting article about people who have evil thoughts. Basically it said and it makes sense that all it is is that person may have a negative emotion like anger or rage come up and along with that emotion a so called evil thought or vision might accompany it. This “evil” thought is only programmed like through watching horror movies. 

So I found it interesting and kept reading about it. I had a feeling to stop reading but I continued and felt like through the fear of my hesitation my subconscious grabbed onto something. This in my entire life has never happened to me but now sometimes when I get very angry/rage towards someone I’ll have a nasty thought about that person like hurting them, it can be gruesome. 

Am I a bad person because of this? I feel guilty after doing it. I remember reading Osho & he said be careful if you are strongly connected to your 3rd eye & the intention is strong ones visions will manifest (could he be talking about a parallel reality possibly this happening)?  I mean I don’t do a lot of work w the 3rd eye, although I feel the space, it’s sensitivity & energy, & I don’t have these thoughts w bad intention. 

Like I said I never had these thoughts. Now I feel guilty about it. It does take my anger away though & when I see the person later on they seem much nicer,’like they learned a lesson from it. 

[Moksha]

Better to see thoughts before they turn into words, and better yet before they become deeds.

First verse of the Dhammapada:

All that we are is the result of what we have thought: it is founded on our thoughts; it is made of our thoughts.

That said, there is no value in judging yourself as a "bad person". Judgment is always egoic, and only leads to deeper blindness.

Instead, let the energy of the thought flow through you without resistance, and without clinging to it. It is only energy, and like everything else in the cosmos it begins and ends unless you trap it.

[Darodos]

Drop the guilt trip. 

What you experience is called decompression.

There are stored up emotions in your system that are getting releases. Subconscious feelings of angery rage, sadness, frustration etc. 

This is very normal, and is actually a sign that you are making progress on yoir spiritual path. They say the body is the temple of the soul. Emotions are part of the body. You are cleaning your temple of all the skelletons you habe been hiding in your basement. 

If you want to be more effocient doing this, then allow those thoughts and feelings fully. Allow them to flow through you. Embody them. Scream. Cry. Punch a pillow. Whatever helps you to release the energy without harming any living beings. You got this bro!

 

[playdoh]

18 minutes ago, Moksha said:

Instead, let the energy of the thought flow through you without resistance, and without clinging to it. It is only energy, and like everything else in the cosmos it begins and ends unless you trap it.

? Thank you

[playdoh]

@Darodos ?❤️❤️

[r0ckyreed]

“It’s not about who you are underneath but what you do that defines you.” - Batman

[playdoh]

@Moksha @Darodos

Hey! I just wanted to open up the space here for another related question. 

What do you think about visualizing the person I’m upset with and see them on a chair and shaking the hell out of the chair and screaming at them at the top of my lungs? Sometimes, if I’m really upset that might turn into some slaps. Or some times I’ll see myself flying in space bashing a bunch of big ass asteroids (I often think of the last scene of the avengers movie or that hulk movie where he rages in the city beating the shit out of buildings and cars) or like street fighter beating the living shit out of an old car, although I don’t think that’s as bad since it’s not towards a human. I feel like this is a great way to release anger. Otherwise the anger may stay inside and I haven’t felt called lately to actually scream or hit pillows or anything like that. 

Is it “bad” to do this? I mean I guess it feels pretty reactionary. I remember reading on here someone did that, maybe not the screaming and all. 

 

[Moksha]

@playdoh Better to visualize than act on anger, but even better not to empower it by visualizing it. Some people try cathartic practices like primal screaming, but I don't see much value in them. If anything, they threaten to fuel the ego further.

Do you meditate? If you can, let the energy pass through you freely, without labeling or entangling yourself with it. Instead, focus your awareness inward. Meditation can help. Energy clouds like anger come and go, and your absolute nature is the sky.

[Razard86]

Bad people don't exist. The issue with selfishness, is just the person's consciousness is twisted and restricted so when it expresses love it expresses it in a haphazard dysfunctional way. For example many people demonize Donald Trump not realizing he does care about other people...it's just hidden behind a very fear based, dysfunctional expression. And obviously he cares MORE about himself than other people.

But Donald Trump isn't waking up in the morning wishing everyone had lives of immense suffering (well maybe the people he hates lol) he wishes good will for most people. He just isn't gonna put any skin in the game to actually try to make that happen. The person who is willing to get in the mud with you and help you when you are in dire straits is the person who truly wishes you well.

Trump's wish for you will be half-hearted but the fact that it even exists reveals that he like the rest of humanity want humanity to THRIVE, but without actually doing anything to make this a reality. The secret in life is every human is trying their best to be good, so bad people don't actually exist.  I entered a state of consciousness where I got to experience how normal people think and it made perfect sense. You see selfishness is pragmatic from the capitalist, materialist paradigm. Avoiding fears, shifting blame, using power to intimidate those who are competing against you to get your OWN desired result and only SOMETIMES thinking about other people after you get your needs met. It's called the path of least resistance, or the path of the most comfort and pleasure! 

So the secret to life is the more you ONLY seek comfort and pleasure the more of a scoundrel you will be to others and the more evil you will perceive and thus the more evil you will do. See no evil, do no evil. When evil doesn't exist, all you experience is paradise.

 

[Breakingthewall]

16 minutes ago, Razard86 said:

Bad people don't exist. The issue with selfishness, is just the person's consciousness is twisted and restricted so when it expresses love it expresses it in a haphazard dysfunctional way

What would you say about a guy who works as a torturer in the dungeons of any medieval castle and who subjects his clients to weeks of the most excruciating pain keeping them alive as long as possible with maximum suffering and who enjoys doing it? It's a challenge to see the love in the hate. 

This guy, for example:

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gilles_de_Rais

Seems quite bad

Edited May 15, 2023 by Breakingthewall

[Yimpa]

Just now, Vibes said:

For the one doing the torture, it's all good. He enjoys it because he doesn't have beliefs holding him back from enjoying torturing. If he had it, he'll stop torturing people.

The one doing the torturing is not really conscious of what they are doing 

 

[playdoh]

@Moksha thanks Moksha. But even ET says to find a way to release the anger because some of the anger energy lingers in the body. I do meditate. But I for sure feel lingering anger even for weeks if I don’t release it. 

[Salvijus]

@playdoh have you tried allowing the anger fully? What i would do is allow the anger to express itself internally so to speak and just observe at the same time. Images of you kicking and screaming may arise in the mind, that's okey, give full permission for all the anger to show itself inside you. Allow it, observe it, and that should lead to healing. At least in my case it does.

The wisdom few know about is that whatever emotion you allow and embrace fully will turn into love. Hard to explain why. And to confirm this in direct experience can take some practice.

Edited May 15, 2023 by Salvijus

[Moksha]

10 minutes ago, playdoh said:

@Moksha thanks Moksha. But even ET says to find a way to release the anger because some of the anger energy lingers in the body. I do meditate. But I for sure feel lingering anger even for weeks if I don’t release it. 

ET gives a nice example of observing two geese getting into a confrontation. They spread their wings and hiss at each other, than serenely float away without clinging to the confrontation.

The point is not to repress anger, but to let its energy flow through you without being defined by or defining others by it.

[playdoh]

2 minutes ago, Salvijus said:

@playdoh have you tried allowing the anger fully? What i would do is allow the anger to express itself internally so to speak and just observe at the same time. Images of you kicking and screaming may arise in the mind, that's okey, give full permission for all the anger to show itself inside you. Allow it, observe it, and that should lead to healing. At least in my case it does.

Thank you. Do you allow the visualization to continue once it arises in the mind even if violence is involved? Dunno if you read the OP. The visualization feels really good and cathartic when I do. 

[Salvijus]

13 minutes ago, playdoh said:

Thank you. Do you allow the visualization to continue once it arises in the mind even if violence is involved? 

Yes give full permission to experience it. Espesially if those imagines are arising naturally and spontanuously. But don't forget to be an observer of it also. A curious child like witness watching "wow, i had no idea i had so much anger in me, interesting" ? and keep allowing and observing and the energy will transform and you'll begin to feel perhaps tears or sadness coming and then keep going further, keep allowing and observing and it will transform into compassion and love. That's when it will be healed and it will have a positive healing effect on the other person aswell

Edited May 15, 2023 by Salvijus

[Ayham]

evil does not exist, unless you make it so 

[Salvijus]

@playdoh don't try to create visualization intentionally tho. It has to arise naturally. Your mind is already wanting to rip that person head off perhaps. So just allow it fully in your mindscape. But also observe the whole thing as it unfolds. Observing and allowing have to go together.

Edited May 15, 2023 by Salvijus

[Salvijus]

@playdoh wanting to rip and kill other people doesn't make you bad it makes you honest 

? little dark humor

Honesty makes all things right and good in the end. So don't be afraid of your honest feelings, embrace them. It will lead to positive results.

Edited May 15, 2023 by Salvijus

[Schizophonia]

1 hour ago, Breakingthewall said:

What would you say about a guy who works as a torturer in the dungeons of any medieval castle and who subjects his clients to weeks of the most excruciating pain keeping them alive as long as possible with maximum suffering and who enjoys doing it? It's a challenge to see the love in the hate. 

This guy, for example:

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gilles_de_Rais

Seems quite bad

Evil does not exist.
Gilles de Rais is not "bad" as we can hear, he's just a human with an excessively anti-social and sadistic mental programming.

Humans aren't normally sociable and kind because that's good, it's just a survival strategy.
You would have been a lion to take pleasure in tearing the belly of your prey to nibble on its organs while it was still alive and dying.