Took The Life Purpose Course- Still Feeling Lost

[herghly]

The life purpose gave me some realizations that i want mobility with my life. I want to b able to live where ever i want and be my own boss. Apart from that I did not have any other realizations. Now, i am feeling a little lost on a what to do... I know Leo talks about doing something meaningful but at the same time i have friends who work  as affiliate markets (working less than 15 hours a week) and making  a lot of money.

 

Right, now i am honestly contemplating learning how to do affliate marketing. Any thoughts? I am feeling quiet lost and would love to chat with someone 

[Chrissy j]

I would say find what is most meaningful to you. The money and easy work week will feel empty. Find your true calling. 

[PetarKa]

My advice is to imagine what it would be like to work in that kind of way for let's say 30 years. Would you still want to do it? I can't answer this question for you, you have to do it. If you say YES, then by all means, go do that. But be careful, as you may not even know whether you'd like doing that until you've lived through those years. And then you can look back and say: "Wow, I wasted my life..." or "Wow that was one beautiful life!" Also, if you haven't found anything else useful from the course, I'd suggest to keep looking, do a lot more introspection, start reading the books on the list, they'll open up your mind concerning what Life Purpose is and isn't. Hope it helped.

[herghly]

Thanks for the reply guys -  i have m y list of values which i believe are true to me. I am thinking about them heavily and what they could mean for me LP wise

[Michael569]

Don't beat yourself over it. I think most of us who have finished this thing end up confused feeling lost. Even for those who know what their life calling is , the path to it is so foggy and distant that it appears unreal..too far out there.  This is the homo stasis in progress and still your cowardly chimp lower self trying to suck you back into your bubble of comfort. 

You knowing that there is this option to live your LP and that you are not sentenced to the like of 9-5 and slave yourself to death is an incredible achievement already. Give yourself the luxury of time but keep growing yourself personally in the meantime. Read whatever books interest you(meaningful books preferably), explore, participate on interesting seminars, watch ted talks and other self guru videos, go out into the nature and contemplate the meaning of live as you walk the woods alone.

There is a big chance that something, somewhere will click in you and suddenly it all falls into pieces ..you find that one missing bit. 

In words of Charles Bukowski:

your life is your life,
don’t let it be clubbed into dank submission.
be on the watch.
there are ways out.
there is a light somewhere.
it may not be much light but
it beats the darkness.
be on the watch.
the gods will offer you chances.
know them, take them. 

[aurum]

Life purpose isn't just something you figure out and then poof, it's over.

No. You will be continually refining your life purpose your entire life.

Most people want to just "figure it out" and get it over with. They're confused, probably in pain and just want to have a purpose so they feel like they know what they're doing.

You've got to fight that. I'm not saying don't trying to figure out what your purpose is...but you've got to be okay with the ambiguity and confusion.

Go inside yourself. Don't run from the emotions, feel them fully and accept them completely.

When was the first time you felt like this?

Once you've done that, can you let it go?

Can you let go of NEEDING to know what you're doing here?

There is no "reason" to do anything.

There is no "reason" for someone to sing.

There is no "reason" to laugh or make a joke.

But it turns out that reason isn't all its cracked up to be anyway.

Do what you love because you love doing it. That's the only reason you need.

 

[The White Belt]

When I found my LP I realised one thing;

That I was hiding it from myself. Seriously. I was literally, purposefully hiding it from myself. 

Not really consciously, but because it was too hard, it required too much from myself, and it made me nervous to admit it to myself.

Make sure you're not doing the same, even if it's emotionally uncomfortable.

 

Good luck.

[herghly]

@BeginnerActualizer Thanks for your reply. What do you mean you were hiding it from yourself? Like you didnt want to accept it because it requires too much work?

[The White Belt]

@herghly Basically every time I thought about LP, a word would pop into my head, the word ACTING. And then consciously or unconsciously (or a mixture of both), I would replace the word with something more 'realistic', or something that I was better at.

One night I told myself, you know what? My LP might be to become an actor, and then I couldn't sleep all night due to this admission. 

The next few days after I thought deeply into it, admitted fully that that is my LP, and it made me cry.

Since then, I've had some anxiety, because this requires a lot of me. I've been acting before, it's nothing new, so I know how hard it is, and how anxious it made me feel. And this is why I was hiding it, in an attempt to find something less emotionally taxing. 

[PetarKa]

@BeginnerActualizer This has been the case for me too. And not just for my LP, but even for my values. And happens A LOT in fact. I notice more and more how much I deceive and manipulate myself. Thoughts come up like: "Oh you don't really want that, it's too hard.", "Nope, can't have that as a value, its too goofy.", or "But if I pick that, my parents won't approve of it..." etc. etc.

I just want to share with you peeps that there are a lot of internal obstacles to finding one's LP. But that's OK. It's part of the process. Just keep digging, keep looking.

[The White Belt]

@PetarKa Thanks for sharing.

To be honest I think if that unless your LP comes with a truck-load of resistance, it isn't your LP.

Your job though, is to find a crack within the resistance, and stick your pinky finger in there. Over the years try to get your whole hand through and then you'll know the resistance can't block you out, and that you can break through it whenever you want. Then it will become more and more enjoyable.

I used to think if it's genuine there will be little to no resistance. Hahaha! How wrong I was. No wonder I couldn't admit it to myself! 

[jjer94]

13 hours ago, BeginnerActualizer said:

I used to think if it's genuine there will be little to no resistance. Hahaha! How wrong I was.

Isn't that funny? That the things we want most, we feel the most resistance towards?

We keep saying, "I want to live life! I want to be happy!" But we're afraid of living, and we're afraid of happiness.

Damnedest thing, ain't it? 

[heisenburger]

@herghly one thing that helped me was not worrying about what I can do as a job but worrying about what the most enjoyable times of my life where. Eg I traced t back to a time I was in a school playground and was yelling, which meant I loved speaking with emotion which than gave me a clue to jobs eg speaking with passion like public speaking acting making YouTube videos where I speak passionately ect.

[BjarkeT]

 Maybe try to find something you are really interested in and try to be really good at it cal newport have a book about this which is called so good they can't ignore you

If i remeber right it explains that the better you are at a specific field and the longer you have been in one the more likely it was to feel really good about it 

here is a quote from the book:

1) “Passion comes after you put in the hard work to become excellent at something valuable, not before. In other words, what you do for a living is much less important than how you do it"

2) “If you want to love what you do, abandon the passion mindset (“what can the world offer me?”) and instead adopt the craftsman mindset (“what can I offer the world?”).”

3) “craftsman mindset focuses on what you can offer the world, the passion mindset focuses instead on what the world can offer you. This mindset is how most people approach their working lives.”

hope you can use it

kind regards

[Magic]

I have been working very, very hard for last 8 years or so and managed to get a very highly-paid job (top 1%) that I like. One of my saddest moments recently was when I realised that I achieved everything (not only money) I once wanted, and my happiness is sooo fragile.

The simplest advice for living a good life I know is to be virtuous and serve others not expecting anything in return.

Elaborating, if you prefer science, there was this research conducted for over 70 years on a group of over 1000 people, which have been recently concluded and the results have been boiled down to one sentence: "Good relationships make us happy, period." (Sorry but I don't have the link now - I think TedEx posted it somewhere.)

Make the purpose of your life to build good relationships with other people. Not needy, not codependent, etc. - good in an actualised sense. I guarantee you will be happy.

[herghly]

@Magic i really like this  "Good relationships make us happy, period."  Thank you for the reminder

[Magic]

@herghly I found the source.

 

Edited March 31, 2017 by Magic

[Tendani]

That feeling you have, it happens to lot of people, what i can say is follow your guts not your mind, because your mind it will trick you and try to convince you to follow the shining objects and not show you whats feel right or connected to you.

And if you feel that you wanna do affiliate marketing, go ahead and do it and pay close attention to all the details, learn about the business and maybe you could find your true calling while doing that, because on been affiliate you can chose which niche is good for you.

 

Sometimes it takes time to find out who you really are and what your purpose is. You dont have to look far to find yourself, and to find your purpose and gift , you are a Gold mine yourself.

It may not happen tomorrow but don't stop until you find it.

Edited April 2, 2017 by Tendani