why does virginity matter?

[Chives99]

It doesnt change who you are as a person how much sex you've had, if you really liked someone surely you would want to work around them not being very experienced and would want to get them up to speed. I just feel its so superficial people think they are better than others because of the amount of sex they've had

[integral]

- Having sex and getting comfortable having sex with someone over time releases a huge burden, its an important milestone for self-development.

- No girl wants to date a virgin unless there both young in high school. Past that point in development they want a guy who knows what they are doing.

- People who have pride over how many people they slept with is a game they are playing to get validation for self-worth. There self-worth is externally verified by material worth. 

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The issue I'm getting is men think like men and don't get the female perspective. Its ok for a woman to be a virgin over 25, its not ok or attractive for a man to be over 30 and a virgin. There is a double standard baked into this. 

Edited May 8, 2023 by integral

[StarStruck]

@integral it is not double standard. It is called biology. 

[integral]

1 minute ago, StarStruck said:

@integral it is not double standard. It is called biology. 

Ye the double standard is set by biology. lol

[hlo_world]

@integral i am in this situation going on 31 now. I can honestly say i am rather suicidal. The thing is I wanted someone since I am 15 but I have been chased away from girls from the beginning, what's even worse the guy who bullied me 8 long years attempted suicide and is rotting in the ground since 13 years....I am hiding my inner self for 16 years now...what do you thin about this peter pan analogy from Jordan Peterson. I felt like it happened to me even though I had an existensial shock with 12 and all the other developmental phases I tried to manipulate myself into some childish behavior.

 

 

Edited June 17, 2023 by hlo_world

[hoodrow trillson]

22 minutes ago, hlo_world said:

@integral i am in this situation going on 31 now. I can honestly say i am rather suicidal. The thing is I wanted someone since I am 15 but I have been chased away from girls from the beginning, what's even worse the guy who bullied me 8 long years attempted suicide and is rotting in the ground since 13 years....I am hiding my inner self for 16 years now...what do you thin about this peter pan analogy from Jordan Peterson. I felt like it happened to me even though I had an existensial shock with 12 and all the other developmental phases I tried to manipulate myself into some childish behavior.

 

 

Do NOT listen to Jordan Peterson unless you’re listening to him ironically.

50% - your time will come, it just hasn’t happened yet and the other 50% - has to be effort put in by you.

You can’t be getting pussy by posting online and watching garbage videos like Jordan Peterson.

It may be time to elevate your friends and social circle.  Find people who party and socialize and who are normal around a lot of women.  It’s now or never because you do not want to hit 40 and still be a virgin.  

 

[Basman]

I believe men tend to reject women with high bodycounts for various reasons when looking for a long-term monogamous relationship.

• A high bodycount can indicate that they are less reliable and stable in a long-term relationship.
• It makes sex less intimate and special if you are just another body.
• It decreases the odds of STDs.

Why virginity matters specifically to someone, it could be a cultural thing where it is seen as virtuous. It could also be a fetish. 

Vice-versa, experience is attractive in men because it makes you more capable of being a good leader. It also indicates that past women found you attractive. A man being a virgin past a certain age can be seen as unattractive for the aforementioned reasons.

I woulnd't really call it a double-standard as much as just a difference for why it is less acceptable for women to have a high bodycount compared to men (though culture can definitely reinforce certain attitudes). Men can't get pregnant and therefor women have much more to gain by being selective. It be the other way around if men got pregnant instead.

 

Edited June 17, 2023 by Basman

[integral]

@hlo_world I think the main point Jordan made is you have to do the work everyday to get results. Leo covers this topic thoroughly in these videos.

 

Edited June 17, 2023 by integral

[max duewel]

It does not matter