What to do next post sex calibration after getting laid?

[ValiantSalvatore]

Fundamentally I got laid, and just want to gather content from different sources and opinions to find sort of a best fit, to make this more concise I just list some stuff.

• Sex was pretty good lasted for 2h, she was interested in all of the sex topics stuff (books I have) and is also more serotonin pathway oriented.... although society is quiet ridiculous me 2 also.
• I did not ask for a number, as keeping it on the app seemed to persevere fantasy and world of the girl 
• I basically made her laugh during sex and she moaned pretty hard and enjoyed it
• I did not cum I dunno a lot of emotional stuff in my life
• She seemed to enjoy all of this a lot

Fundamentally my question is what are possible options after getting laid it was quiet compatible there is a lot of good stuff coming out of this, it basically could turn into a longterm/short-term relationship. I just find it tricky to navigte the social sphere I am mostly interested in growing as a human, yet obviously I will maximize my possibilities to get laid, for multiple reasons. 

Any thoughts to mull over? We're compatible, yet she is not a RGW = Really Great Women (term from an audiobook) so it's not till now what I feel would be smth, yet I also never know etc. This mostly strengthen my vision based on the value of connection somehow. 

I will ask her out again, or just go for cooking I presume, yet what are usual ways you get into "post sex calibration" after getting laid I frankly also don't care I just want her to feel good about herself and enjoy growth. 

Other questions...

• What are good responses times after meeting and having sex to not make her feel like a total "slut" etc? She might like it also, so I dunno.
• What are ideas to meet, it's fundamentally the same routine sort of? Find some chill activity and do it, lead again to getting laid etc.
• Any big picture thoughts etc. appreciated.

Edited April 30, 2023 by ValiantSalvatore

[integral]

is she your women or not? Women want a man who intuitively understands owns her and has her back.

Why are you uncertain, do you have fear of commitment? Your not going to be stuck with them for the rest of your life, forget the concept of ONS, long-term and short-term. Go with the flow dont over think.

She came into your life and will leave your life or not how ever way its going to happen. 

Edited April 30, 2023 by integral

[ValiantSalvatore]

15 hours ago, integral said:

is she your women or not? Women want a man who intuitively understands owns her and has her back.

Why are you uncertain, do you have fear of commitment? Your not going to be stuck with them for the rest of your life, forget the concept of ONS, long-term and short-term. Go with the flow dont over think.

She came into your life and will leave your life or not how ever way its going to happen. 

Yeah this is more in alignment of the better advice, I did not ask for a number I can be emotionally very closed off, as I contemplate emotions a lot. Anyway she does not text back I could have just asked her for her number and said to her I'll let you know when I am free. So I intutively have her back as well as I am not constraining her. I did not go for this simply I was to much into logic mode. I don't fear commitment I might just don't really know what it is. I must have made it slightly akward by not asking for the number. I thought keeping it on the app was better as I dated 4 girls this week and the only one where I did not have the number I legit laid her.

Although I could have gone more with the flow = create flow, yet I do have some issues with that currently energetically after the injury I noticed it's a mental construct still it has a physical reality, I don't feel as strong anymore, hence loosing masculine presence. 

Yeah I definitely could have asked for her number, instead of keeping it on the app. I received the same advice in a sense with going with the flow. The point is providing security in terms of confidence and strength seems to be the biggest turn on, and ever since the injury I don't feel as strong and bold anymore, so I do my best with the current strength I've had building mental strength and resilliance is what seems to be also possible. What I lack currently is conviction in my vision and life, as I drew a lot from this through physical health now it's mostly emotional and mental. 

I definitely need both techniques and mindsets etc. I don't at times have the energy anymore to maintain flow that deeply. So I might deviate from more fine-tuned flow that is not that palpable in the connection process with the girl, the point is also as I do a lot of flow based type meditation I create a lot of flow. At times you don't even get credit for it, yet I could just simply take it.... similar to how I laid her... so that is interesting.

Thanks for sharing thoughts and giving me the opportunity to reflect properly!

As well as connecting more emotionally, generally all of this is very interesting. 

Edited May 1, 2023 by ValiantSalvatore

[integral]

5 hours ago, ValiantSalvatore said:

Yeah this is more in alignment of the better advice, I did not ask for a number I can be emotionally very closed off, as I contemplate emotions a lot. Anyway she does not text back I could have just asked her for her number and said to her I'll let you know when I am free. So I intutively have her back as well as I am not constraining her. I did not go for this simply I was to much into logic mode. I don't fear commitment I might just don't really know what it is. I must have made it slightly akward by not asking for the number. I thought keeping it on the app was better as I dated 4 girls this week and the only one where I did not have the number I legit laid her.

Ah ok so your dating a bunch of women at the same time and are figuring out which one to pick. Go with wtv women you connect with most or you can keep dating around and find out you really like and keep that one around.

They are contacting you vai the app. Asking for her number is not an indication that your officially interested now. She has no idea your sleeping around with other women at the same time, and keep it that way. How you made her feel about you is the indication she cares about. if you made her feel amazing she expects you feel the same about her and thinks you will see her again. She has no idea your autisticly thinking your emotions or like her or don't. So how did you make her feel, did you make her feel like you've been best friends her entire life? If yes then the connection is strong for her and will be hurt with out a reply. She already bonded. She does not need your "space" giving, She wants you to take action. Your focusing to much on you and your autonomy to be independent and make your own decisions and dont realize that how you made her feel was the decision she received. The other important factor is how she personally is viewing the situation and that you dont know unless you ask. She could be like you and just fooling around with out expectations, or not, this is the assumption that she slept with you and does not have expectations "she hasnt decided yet". 

Edited May 1, 2023 by integral

[ValiantSalvatore]

I dated a bunch of girls last week. She is not replying I was curious I should have asked for a number, this was advice from guys who are telling me to stop doing rocket science in a sense. I presume I made her feel good she would have even stayed longer for an hour to take the subway back, I do like her. I drove her back instead.

I cried on the way back in the car because of her life story and just human history etc. I might overall been to nice still you see? She enjoyed it a lot when I was dominating her telling me. I do have long-hair for a reason. This is somewhat a common pattern in my life. Girls are wild definitely.

1 hour ago, integral said:

She could be like you and just fooling around with out expectations, or not, this is the assumption that she slept with you and does not have expectations "she hasnt decided yet". 

This is most likely it I did not ask for a number and in that sense continued the connection, as she said yes in person to future meet-ups post-sex. She seemed to have enjoyed it otherwise we would not have done it for 2h, as well as willing sit on my lap readily post-sex the point is girls expect a little more also when you're buff/atheletic, and I lost a lot of masculine drive you see?  (I believe she really liked my dick but okay she also said it and moaned quiet load).

She is most likely also dating around as she is young 20 years old, so I just thought also fuck it, if it does not work, let her have fun.  I am having fun on my own with her and without her. We did bond definitely not all to deep, I'd say it was good. If it was that great she'd most likely would reply to some manner afterwards. There was no focus on autonomey, I did not ask for her number simply as I figured the app is fine to persevere the bond you see?

Apparently that was the wrong choice from all the feedback I've gathered, although the experience alone let me grow I still notice it it was fantastic, and I am grateful to her. I just seem to be confusing my body is bombarded with 10k impulses for different reasons, so I might at times act like I am socially unaware, yet I am physically more aware.... than I thought.... so yeah. Next time I ask for a number and build more sexual intimacy, and connect more emotionally, I've found better questions, I do also have more life experience hence the connection was not as big, if she would have told me more about her life I would have broken out into tears, it's insane how f'ed the world is based on war. 

To be more specific and practical to the points you've made!

1 hour ago, integral said:

She wants you to take action. Your focusing to much on you and your autonomy to be independent and make your own decisions and dont realize that how you made her feel was the decision she received. The other important factor is how she personally is viewing the situation and that you dont know unless you ask. She could be like you and just fooling around with out expectations, or not, this is the assumption that she slept with you and does not have expectations "she hasnt decided yet". 

• Correct she wants me to take action and lead 100% of the time and still take into account her desires etc, I could have led more it's insane how much she would have appreciated me as a honry dog in terms of contrast. I could have gotten her number and called her to take action and continue the bond, be like hey what's up you enjoyed last night?. I'll let you know when I am free etc. The point is I never noticed how sexual girls even see me, just reading analyzing and implementing is a great tool! 
• She poked fun at me and "shit tested" as a computer science guy, I bet you've did not see a lot of tities, I told her I've seen a couple and played around more with them (sincerity). I took mostly action from these test, it's more like I never acted on sexual impulses and girls seem to be very open to me sexually.
   
• She loved my larger lips and she could not get enough of them legit! She kept asking me if I like it slow and or fast. My brain does not compute these concepts I legit wanted to make her squirt the whole time, and have a double orgasm. She legit became me in that sense that was the most interesting observation, my desire was her desire in that moment, if I could have we both would have cum. It legit was perfect ??. I did not come most likely due to emotional reasons having been to the doctor the day before, and changing health perspectives and goals and life plans etc.

  • 1 hour ago, integral said:

    So how did you make her feel, did you make her feel like you've been best friends her entire life

    No, I feel this costed sexual polarity between me and the girl as I was to nice, and not more animalistic. Best friends vibe imo is not good from conscious information from David Deida, she wants to be taken and f*ed at least this was how it felt to me as well as for her. Basically ravishing her having more of this "animal connection".  It would be more enticing if I would have asked and move more into sexual topics and likes and dislikes, we might have been to friendly you see? 

• I don't know how she personally feels without asking and having her number I presume, yet if she is not responding she simply does not care.

I can ask her for a girls number next time, I had to distill some essentials and focus more on connection part, I at times can be very intellectual and saiposexual if we're mentally not clicking the bond is not that strongly on for me. Even if sex is good etc. I enjoy it when she's a little more teasing etc. 

Generally connecting more on an emotional level, my heart does seem to become more open despite all mistakes, all it takes is experience. The point is beign assertive and confident is still very important and not beign a doormat. 

Anyway thank you! No need to respond further if you're not yourself interested this is plenty of feedback in the outer/inner field of attraction and dating. Thank you a lot!!! Also thanks for not pocking and or making fun of me, I sometimes feel I notice more than even, so called advanced gamers. Although it's mostly based on physical bonding, so you're intuition is correct. I do just have to learn more here so again thank you!
 

Edited May 1, 2023 by ValiantSalvatore

[integral]

1 hour ago, ValiantSalvatore said:

Anyway thank you! No need to respond further if you're not yourself interested this is plenty of feedback in the outer/inner field of attraction and dating. Thank you a lot!!! Also thanks for not pocking and or making fun of me, I sometimes feel I notice more than even, so called advanced gamers. Although it's mostly based on physical bonding, so you're intuition is correct. I do just have to learn more here so again thank you!

lmao you provided all the insights, answered all your own questions. Good move. 

1 hour ago, ValiantSalvatore said:

She is most likely also dating around as she is young 20 years old

That's an important point, my personal experience with all women i encounter is after they meet me its instant connection and they want to be around me all the time, even if we are not dating or friends they say "we have a connection". So the game your playing i find difficult to relate to, I've seen it a lot in young and insecure youth that still haven't come out of there shell yet and allowed themselves to be there authentic self and just relax. But its seems your very sensitive and educated and feel the need to restrain yourself in fear of misplaying things. Once your in flow and tuned in to the woman's needs it becomes effortless, these games and uncertainty drop away. 

1 hour ago, ValiantSalvatore said:

She seemed to have enjoyed it otherwise we would not have done it for 2h, as well as willing sit on my lap readily post-sex the point is girls expect a little more also when you're buff/atheletic, and I lost a lot of masculine drive you see?  (I believe she really liked my dick but okay she also said it and moaned quiet load).

There is a lot of this kind of reverse engineering how she feels with evidence . When your tuned in to her you know exactly what she is thinking and feeling and you don't need external evidence. 

1 hour ago, ValiantSalvatore said:

• • No, I feel this costed sexual polarity between me and the girl as I was to nice, and not more animalistic. Best friends vibe imo is not good from conscious information from David Deida, she wants to be taken and f*ed at least this was how it felt to me as well as for her. Basically ravishing her having more of this "animal connection".  It would be more enticing if I would have asked and move more into sexual topics and likes and dislikes, we might have been to friendly you see? 

Being her friend is not black and white like that. The way your talking about the masculine vs feminine polarity is people who have a unhealthy imbalances. They both need to be in balance in one person to reach your full potential. What vibe does a guru give off to a women? That's the kind of strong connection you want to give to a women. Its balanced in masculine and feminine. To be her friend is so she feels 100% comfortable with you to talk about anything, like your the first person in her life that she feels she can be her true self around and not be judged. There world changes when they meet you, every time you speak it shows them a new way of living they didnt know existed before meeting you. They have no idea how they lived there life this long with out you. That's the value you want to bring to her life that makes you into a super star in her eyes. That then needs to be in balance with sexual energy and passion that she feels for you. Passion + Intimacy + Commitment = Integral Relationship 

 

Edited May 1, 2023 by integral

[ValiantSalvatore]

1 minute ago, integral said:

That's an important point, my personal experience with all women i encounter is after they meet me its instant connection and they want to be around me all the time, even if we are not dating or friends they say "we have a connection". So the game your playing i find difficult to relate to, I've seen it a lot in young and insecure youth that still haven't come out of there shell yet and allowed themselves to be there authentic self and just relax. But its seems your very sensitive and educated and feel the need to restrain yourself in fear of misplaying things. Once your in flow and tuned in to the woman's needs it becomes effortless, these games and uncertainty drop away. 

Pretty much sums it open, imagine I broke through all of it alone again, just to have it taken by smth. I don't have a single point of influence in besides when I really go down memory lane, yet these are scenarios based on advice from others where time played a role. 

The point is you're a natural clearly, I do have to learn parts of game just "beign myself" is advice that does not work. 

2 minutes ago, integral said:

There is a lot of this kind of reverse engineering how she feels with evidence . When your tuned in to her you know exactly what she is thinking and feeling and you don't need external evidence. 

That is what I meant! She became me, there is no difference just physical bodies corroborating each others intent. I loved to do it with LSD with her to explore more the conscious aspects, yet I missplayed it eventually I thought I just need tabs in case this happens again. Bro her pussy smelled so nice :( 

You legit are a god! I will just do Yoga eyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy . It's legit 1 min away from me and I get some connection and train my body&health etc.

29 minutes ago, integral said:

Being her friend is not black and white like that. The way your talking about the masculine vs feminine polarity is people who have a unhealthy imbalances. They both need to be in balance in one person to reach your full potential. What vibe does a guru give off to a women? That's the kind of strong connection you want to give to a women. Its balanced in masculine and feminine. To be her friend is so she feels 100% comfortable with you to talk about anything, like your the first person in her life that she feels she can be her true self around and not be judged. There world changes when they meet you, every time you speak it shows them a new of living they didnt know existed before meeting you. They have no idea how they lived there life this long with out you. Thats the value you want to bring to her life that makes you into a super star in her eyes. 

I never meet a guru, mostly just meditators and one who is deeply enlightend in that sense, it's a way more dry dynamic. I have something else in memory from David Deida and being more of a lover instead of a friend etc. She should not play the role of a friend, yet I might be wrong. 

Thank you all in all I will just start yoga  I did a course before from Sadghuru as I wanted to do a retreat in India . Thanks for the deeper interconnection of topics! I would not have Googled Yoga for 1h now . I am going to be a dirty yogi . I can't belive this shit at times it's to funny. 

I love you thanks!

33 minutes ago, integral said:

There world changes when they meet you, every time you speak it shows them a new of living they didnt know existed before meeting you.

That is the weirdest thing, yet so true. I missed the interconnections of worlds and crafting and continuing to crafte in mine and this world!

34 minutes ago, integral said:

They have no idea how they lived there life this long with out you. Thats the value you want to bring to her life that makes you into a super star in her eyes. 

That is true she intutively yearnd for this, it's funny that when you code this into an algorithm.... all stakeholders improve their selection apparently. Yeah I dunno, yet thank you for all the insights! I will do Yoga the region here is based on connection and I am the idiot who keeps looking at the wrong ends partially. 

[ValiantSalvatore]

40 minutes ago, integral said:

There is a lot of this kind of reverse engineering how she feels with evidence . When your tuned in to her you know exactly what she is thinking and feeling and you don't need external evidence. 

I dunno I presume the actions just spoke for themselves. It legit had tiny bits of god-like elements I meditated the whole time, when I was conscious of it, she was impacted by this, yet I was not hitting any deeper flow states. 

I just wish they could be a little taller currently, bro I love you for the advice I don't even believe it . 

Edited May 1, 2023 by ValiantSalvatore

[integral]

Sound good man, post again on the next insight hunt. 

6 hours ago, ValiantSalvatore said:

it's funny that when you code this into an algorithm.... all stakeholders improve their selection apparently

??? What algorithm are we talking about here??

 

Edited May 1, 2023 by integral

[ValiantSalvatore]

9 hours ago, integral said:

Sound good man, post again on the next insight hunt. 

Will do if it's worth it!

9 hours ago, integral said:

??? What algorithm are we talking about here??

Elitist selection from evolutionary algorithms, when I recall correctly it helps the entire population. I was not the best at this lecture, many struggle with this, so information could be partially wrong, but here is the source.

Quote

Retaining the best individuals in a generation unchanged in the next generation, is called elitism or elitist selection. It is a successful (slight) variant of the general process of constructing a new population.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Selection_(genetic_algorithm)#:~:text=Retaining the best individuals in,of constructing a new population.