What's the point?

[Mileyofpink]

I recently ended a five year toxic relationship. Have been spending time alone for the first time after almost 7 years. 

I do everything to make myself feel i had a productive day. I'm not working right now, studying in a year long course so i have quite a bit of time on my hands and i do as much as i can to not let it get wasted. Working on my health, fitness, upskilling myself and if all the tasks are completed i sit down, watch Netflix. 

I'm also working on a project. It's been a month now and things have hit a plateau. I'm not seeing any results and my weight loss has stopped no matter what i do. I'm not earning money right now either. 

 

I'm starting to feel hopeless. At the end of the day i feel like what's the point. But i have no option but to keep going otherwise I'll always be like this, an uninspired life. 

 

When i was in a relationship i would feel like i still have something, or someone. But now it's just me. No one to share with. Things are stagnant, i don't have any social life or prospects to meet people. I feel hopeless, i feel like a loser for not being able to bring results. I just.. what's the point? 

 

Feeling completely uninspired and dull since a while. Nothing brings me joy anymore. I feel lonely too.

Any advice?

[NoSelfSelf]

Too much outward resault orienting causes your self worth,self image to suffer.Focusing on the process and not on the end resault lessens the suffering .Also expectations are huge thing that brings you down,your expectations should be based on the capacities you now have, you must understand yourself to know your current limits otherwise if you do more than you can, then you will feel like you cant do it(overwhelmed) so thats why you ask whats the point when im not meeting my expectations...

Edited April 21, 2023 by NoSelfSelf

[Ulax]

@Mileyofpink I'd start doing some sort of inner work, such as meditation. If finances allow for then I recommend also getting started with a depth experiential therapy. That type of therapy, to my understanding, is about really processing the underlying feelings you have stored away in your subconscious. Examples of these, in my opinion, would be gestalt therapy, internal family systems therapy and somatic experiencing therapy.

Edited April 22, 2023 by Ulax
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[meta_male]

On 4/21/2023 at 5:35 PM, Mileyofpink said:

I recently ended a five year toxic relationship. Have been spending time alone for the first time after almost 7 years.

Congratulations for getting yourself out of a toxic relationship and taking responsibility for your healing. It will take a bit of time, but be patient and kind with yourself. Also with your self talk, this is important. Don't beat yourself up for not getting results right now. Things will add up and get rolling, just take it one step at a time for now, there's nothing you must achieve. If anything make sure you're just taking care of yourself. Your situation has to look hopeless and chaotic for the moment, this is normal. I can recommend looking into IFS, doesn't need to be therapy but just getting aware of different parts at play in yourself can bring you a sense of peace: https://ifs-institute.com/store/39

Edited May 4, 2023 by Sincerity