Most transformative socialization insight you had

[Lifelover88]

What were the most transformative social skills insights you had? I'm posting because I don't really know how to socialize with most groups of people. I don't understand how what they're talking about could be interesting and why we should talk about it. I can't even make friends with people who should be similar to me. I've watched lots of youtube videos but I don't seem to get any better.

I'll start: the look in your eye dictates the conversation you'll have with them.

[Ulax]

The self is always coming through

[Mz Hyde]

One that was the most eye opening for me: People don't give a fuck about how you look, act etc. They only care about how they themselves come across. So, even if someone makes some rude comment, it says nothing about you, but them.

[Dan502]

A social group is a bit like a rowing boat, in that in order for it to go anywhere, people have to put in the effort of rowing i.e. speaking.
This statement is not absolutely true but it may help.

It's natural for groups to contain some disagreement over the direction in which to take a conversation, or even the kind of conversation that's worth talking about.

What kind of conversation would you find interesting and could you find a group that discusses it?

[Vibes]

I am so intimately close to everyone and everything around me.

There is nothing to hide / I cannot hide anything. My Consciousness sees it all.

My Mind is everything, all is inside my Mind. < That sounds crazy to the normie man, but it's true.

These are the ultimate antidotes to shyness. When you see everyone around are so close and intimate to you, shyness cannot exist.

Edited April 17, 2023 by Vibes

[Ninja_pig]

My main insight is that I'm actually a normal person, and if someone says I'm weird then that is their own misconception.

Another one is that taking a genuine interest in someone else is the surest way to get them to talk to you.

[Carl-Richard]

You can't just talk about what you think is interesting all the time (that is my insight). And socializing can still be fun despite that.

[Leo Gura]

Massive experience will solve all your problems. But I do mean massive.

Edited April 18, 2023 by Leo Gura

[LSD-Rumi]

• Just, relax and act talk freely and sponateneously like crazy people do.
• People will love almost anything when said in a sarcastic manner.
• Context is more important thean content
• Don't repress emotions when you talk, let them appear on your face and on your body
• Talk about anything. Learn to tell stories about silly and funny things. 

[StarStruck]

Major insight for me was that socialization is mostly subconscious.

If you ask naturals how they socialize, they won't able to verbalize it. It is just programming from their functional parents and functional environment that programmed their subconscious.

If you want to speed up your learning curve you need to get into subconscious work because the bacon is there: get the disfunctional programming out of your subconscious. Most people are wasting time by only doing the conscious work and neglecting the subconscious work.

Success is in your subconscious. And your subconscious is in your body.

 

Edited April 18, 2023 by StarStruck

[JosephKnecht]

On 17/04/2023 at 11:06 PM, Lifelover88 said:

What were the most transformative social skills insights you had?

When approaching strangers, approach them as if they are your friend you have not seen in a while. 

If you already assume familiarity, it reduces the tension.

The way you see them will reflect on how they see you. 

[Carl-Richard]

On 18.4.2023 at 6:55 PM, Carl-Richard said:

You can't just talk about what you think is interesting all the time (that is my insight). And socializing can still be fun despite that.

Lol apparently this has a name:

Quote

Autistic thinking refers to a cognitive progress that is not in accordance with consensus reality, but rather emphasizes preoccupation with inner experiences and needs. More generally, it means thinking that is driven by internally oriented wishes and desires regardless of external factors.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glossary_of_psychiatry#autistic_thinking

 

Maybe I'm autistic after all 

Edited April 19, 2023 by Carl-Richard

[Miguel1]

Self-Love is key. Pretty much impossible to get anyone to like you, or to even have a good time around you, if you hate yourself and your life.

[Spiritedness]

On 4/18/2023 at 8:39 PM, StarStruck said:

Major insight for me was that socialization is mostly subconscious.

If you ask naturals how they socialize, they won't able to verbalize it. It is just programming from their functional parents and functional environment that programmed their subconscious.

If you want to speed up your learning curve you need to get into subconscious work because the bacon is there: get the disfunctional programming out of your subconscious. Most people are wasting time by only doing the conscious work and neglecting the subconscious work.

Success is in your subconscious. And your subconscious is in your body.

 

@StarStruck How do you recommend one goes about that? What resources would you recommend for subconscious work and reframing negative beliefs n' stuff?

[StarStruck]

17 minutes ago, Spiritedness said:

@StarStruck How do you recommend one goes about that? What resources would you recommend for subconscious work and reframing negative beliefs n' stuff?

Read all books from Joe Dispenza. His stuff is the newest on the subject of the subconscious. And it is scientific. If you are into self help his is golden. Leo’s “consciousness work” is waste of time if you are in the business of improving your life. 

[Patrick_9931]

The more you feel good with yourself and inside yourself, the more people will feel good around you. 

The insight was brought also thanks to 2cb which I really recommend for socialisation work.