If you do it right, it will hurt.

[ivankiss]

How do you know you're doing the work the right way? Well, it sucks ass. It hurts as hell. That's how. 

It sucks, it's painful and crazy, but it's also the best thing that could have ever happened to you. It's beyond your wildest imagination. It's rewarding beyond words. It's more than you could have ever asked for. It's ineffable.

But it's also the most challenging thing you've ever done. It's so complex. So deep. All-encompassing. It demands absolute commitment. In fact, you have no other choice. You must go down this path. You chose it and it chose you. It cannot be stopped. And you cannot take a break. It's forever ongoing.

It is as personal as it gets and simultaneously has nothing to do with you as a person, at all. It's all about you and not about you at all. You are carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders, and you are doing it for yourself and for everyone else, too.

You will suffer. Rocks will be thrown at you. People will spit in your face in stab you in the back. You will be hurt, betrayed and utterly devastated. You will be brought down to your knees, repeatedly. What you love will be taken away from you, with no warning. You will feel the pain of loss and failure. In your darkest hour, when you need someone the most, there will be no one around. Not a single soul. 

You are walking this path all alone. It is literally the highest calling. And it's not going to be a walk in a park.

Nothing will hurt as much as witnessing your own death. Watching yourself holding on for dear life, terrified of letting go and forever dissolving into nothingness.

You will try to save yourself. Even though it is that very same self that blinded you and kept you away from The Truth... you will want to be by its side while its dying. It is the biggest heartbreak in existence. And it is inevitable.

'Gripping to the last touch of your hand I grow to loathe...'

You will be broken over and over again, until nothing but the Truth remains. Humbled over and over again. Reduced to nothing. And then elevated again.

If you think you're going to avoid pain and suffering... you have no idea what you're up for.

At some point, you will learn how to transform the darkness. You will master your being. The universe. Yourself. But nothing will ever be excluded. Nothing will ever seize to exist. Everything always is. Forever. It's up to you to handle and balance it all. And that is a long journey. It won't happen over night. Even after realizing the highest Truth there is, it will take a long time before you adjust and learn how to walk that Truth. How to be it, in every moment of this life. No, there is no time and no journey, and yes, time is one of your best friends and you absolutely must go through numerous processes in order to ground this realization into reality. There will be a lot of undoing. A lot of unlearning. Unpacking and dismantling. Dissolving and disintegrating.

It goes both ways. And you must know how to play both sides, so to speak. You have to know how to handle both erosion and rebirth. You have to know when and how to take control and when and how to surrender.

Only one of us has to do it right. And it can only be you. No one else can do it for you. 

You are the way.

Edited April 7, 2023 by ivankiss

[Water by the River]

Beautifully written. Looks like you have a heart of courage. 

>How do you know you're doing the work the right way? Well, it sucks ass. It hurts as hell. That's how. 

Yet I think it also depends on the techniques you use for letting go of the separate self arising if it is felt like deaths & pain & drama or more like releases. And of course it depends on the circumstances (individual and surroundings).

Looking back, for me is was a long path (that could have been much faster with better coaching and the right techniques and views/understandings right from the start), but it was more like letting go certain separate self elements / relief & bliss / integration / letting go more elements of separate self / relief & bliss / integration / n+1. Of course there were also "bumpy parts" in the road.

Basically, I believe their are two mechanisms working in the universe: The stick and the carrot. Problem with the carrot: You have to want what the universe wants, and move voluntarily in that direction, and understand how to do that. Tricky business...

I am writing this because I think the path can also appear too daunting or painful, so that some people don't even start walking it. Probably in most cases, it doesnt have to be too daunting if done with the right tools.

Nice mindset for the path:

 

And while doing all the differentiating/transcending/dying, don't forget to integrate/heal/be good to yourself.

Even when the separate self dissolves step by step, there still should remain a healthy character running the show within You. Karma still holds. Padmasambhava: "Although my view is higher than the sky, My respect for the cause and effect of actions is as fine as grains of flour."

Bon voyage! 

Water by the River

 

[ivankiss]

@Squeekytoy ❤

@Water by the River Very cool input, many thanks.

Oh how many times have I wished for a mentor haha! And in a sense, I do have 'guides' who showed up here and there and pointed towards the right direction. Leo is one of them, I'd say.

But at some point it seems as if it must be so that all guides, masters and mentors disappear and you're left all alone. You must learn how to guide yourself. 

I do believe that methods and techniques can work, but I'm also strongly against anything that's promoted as a 'one size fits all'. I think each and every one of us has a completely unique journey. Certainly there are some similarities and certain guidelines and maps can come in handy, but ultimately I think the most direct way is your way. Life is already doing everything to wake you up. If you tune into that and follow it, it will show you all the how's and when's, right on time.

Will check the vid, thanks again.

All the best.

[Kuba Powiertowski]

@ivankiss

I sense the dark night of the soul. I'm going through it myself. Ever since I came to this planet, it has haunted me. I ran wherever and whenever I could. But you can't run away from your own shit. But now I'm ready. Two pieces of advice from Winston Churchill: "If you're going through hell, keep going." "The only thing we have to fear is fear." One from Martin Luther King: "Fly! If You can't fly, run! If You can't run, walk! If You can't walk, crawl. But don't stop."
And one from Ba'al Shem Tov: "Let me fall if I must fall. The One I become will catch me."

Good luck. You can do it. Follow Your Heart. That is free. That is You. You are the Light of Divine Love. Nothing else.

[Moksha]

?It's easy to underestimate the cost of surrendering to the glory of the absolute. People naturally want an easy awakening, but eventually realize that this is naïve.

The absolute is such pure love that only the unconditional descent into the darkness leads into its light. It wrings every drop of ego from the sponge, but replenishes it to overflowing with the water of life.

Dissolving identification with the mind doesn't require releasing the person entirely. Instead, it is transfigured into a steed, which takes you to the tallest peaks and the deepest depths within the dream.

[ivankiss]

@Kuba Powiertowski Love those quotes, thanks. All the best.

@Moksha Beautifully put. Thank you.