What is the best place to donate?

[at_anchor]

So I want to donate some cash. Maybe I should go look for a beggar or something. I'd love to invest in this site because I know if everyone knew about it people would start getting much more conscious. However, I think that might not be wise because I might end up dying soon after that and I don't want people to get the mistaken assumption that it has anything to do with this. It's kind of too late. If I had the knowledge and understanding I have now that is basically good for growth and education in the past, I'd probably be more successful in getting it. But now life just got harder and it is pretty much useless. Back at square one.

So please let me know where would you donate your cash in society other than this site and maybe other than searching for a beggar.

[Sucuk Ekmek]

I wouldn't donate, for me there are other options. I could use my resources to give something to society.

[at_anchor]

23 minutes ago, Sucuk Ekmek said:

I wouldn't donate, for me there are other options. I could use my resources to give something to society.

Nope, there is nothing I can do for society with a thousand and a half bucks.

[at_anchor]

I can't even do good for myself with that money.

[at_anchor]

4 minutes ago, Squeekytoy said:

@at_anchor you only live once my man. Why not give yourself a treat. Nobody is going to miss your thousand and a half. 

I can't buy health with that money. Neither can I buy love. Nor safety, nor friends. Nothing of value can I buy with this money.

[at_anchor]

In times of war money can't buy much.

No way unfortunately, no way.

Edited April 7, 2023 by at_anchor

[Nilsi]

The greatest gift you can give to society is actualizing your potential, so invest that money into yourself - if you truly care to do good.

If that means therapy, because you're too depressed and disillusioned with life to think of something productive to do, so be it.

[at_anchor]

52 minutes ago, Squeekytoy said:

@at_anchor i don't know your situation. Share however much or little you feel comfortable with. 

Ah, some asshole that I kissed with and licked basically, who visited me at my home where I had trouble with very armed men that are not good people, he got together with them behind my back and with a couple of key people who can basically control the authorities. Now they are trying to run me over. 

He pretended to not care about politics at all, but now he wants to go into it and leave his sexuality in the closet I guess. Maybe. Probably. So he gossips about me and tries to frame me for rape or something behind my back so that people can take away my rights, job opportunities and so forth. He never loved me and tried to disuade me from studying a language that made him much smarter in the first place and I saw many other clues to that. But he basically layed down on a fucking table while it was raining and wanted me to fuck him, and so forth, not once did I use fucking force and in fact he's the one who seduced me in the first place, who started it with a hug. That chomo with a little bit bigger dick than mine who didn't, didn't, didn't want me to give him a blowjob, lol

Anyway, no really, I don't know why, I guess I was either too ugly that night (and in general for him) or he just likes ten out of tens or worse, he's a chomo. He is. 

And so yeah. Now they want to drive over me with the chariot of force in this country, together. It's probably not him. He was contacted to come on this with them to destroy me. Now I appear even more crazy because I am saying this and I cannot ever say it to anyone. No one would believe me or they would not care. 

As simple as that. I don't know much about the mastermind behind the attacks. They just want to sweep me under the, well, I don't know what wretched place they have in mind. Probably something unbearably difficult to handle and something, yeah, or they just want me to die or wait for my death like I am in a fucking prison, keep quiet while they grow, live life fully, take it all, remove enemies, probably. I don't know.

I'd throw up from this. I'd throw up. 

So yeah, people want to frame me, ostracize me, poison me, drive me crazy, drive over me, lock me up in a torture chamber basically and torture me. Cause they had the luck of having resources available for finding truth and developing at least one fourth of this guys mind who runs this site, but they are not him. They are not a peaceful being. More like greedy beasts that devaur and tear apart anything they can. It's just that they are so smart and sophisticated, not needy, happy in life, that they can wait a longer time till they exact what they have in mind, slowly pushing me lower and lower.

[at_anchor]

politics and/or business*

[at_anchor]

@Squeekytoy maybe I am wrong about this or that thing, but the overall theme rings true to me. Safety required but not able to get it. Psychopathic chomos with a lot of power out to get me. Dramatic to the point of having no space for myself anymore cause it is all taken and I am cornered with people that just push me down or over the line maybe. Conflict of interest and overal historic conflict. I'd like to switch lives. I'd like to get out of here because there is no place for a monkey like me in a forest full of these wolves and snakes that just follow me and want to. You know what, I sound more and more crazy as I speak, which is exactly the problem. Exactly. It is true, I am not imagining this up.

[at_anchor]

@Squeekytoy maybe I can, maybe I can't. I don't know. Probably not.

I feel that there is no escape from this kind of a group that has it all, kind of like that James Bond movie with Christopher Waltz as the main villain. I just know that I can't get out of here for too long. And wherever I go, they will probably be able to somehow follow and make sure that I lose and come back, that I don't end up well. They probably have it all planned, or I don't know how they function.

Which is exactly why I'd like to escape the whole world which is cheap and easy to do. Then I'd be safe from them.

But then I don't know where I would be or would I be at all.

Edited April 7, 2023 by at_anchor

[Danioover9000]

@at_anchor

8 hours ago, at_anchor said:

So I want to donate some cash. Maybe I should go look for a beggar or something. I'd love to invest in this site because I know if everyone knew about it people would start getting much more conscious. However, I think that might not be wise because I might end up dying soon after that and I don't want people to get the mistaken assumption that it has anything to do with this. It's kind of too late. If I had the knowledge and understanding I have now that is basically good for growth and education in the past, I'd probably be more successful in getting it. But now life just got harder and it is pretty much useless. Back at square one.

So please let me know where would you donate your cash in society other than this site and maybe other than searching for a beggar.

   This site, meaning Actualized.org, or what site are you referring to?

   Why look for a beggar when you can donate to a charity? Also, if it's me I'd advice against because I was ripped off and jumped by a few homeless people, so I'd be careful there, better to donate to a store or some website.

   Can you elaborate more on your current situation to us? I can't really attempt to give a general advice because we don't know much of the specifics of your situation, maybe more elaboration might lead to a better advice?

[at_anchor]

@Danioover9000 i don't know if there is advice to be given in my case.

but simply put, people get selfish reasons to be turned against me evrywhere I go. this was not so in the past. 

you have these people who grew up moderately rich or quite lucky that occupy key positions in society. they are not religious or anything like that. totally immoral, but with a face of decency cause they have the power to make themselves appear like they are good.

on the other hand, they have an enemy, me. with fale evidence, distorted claims of what happend, they go about, scheaming with others and making me appear like a devil or person who does not deserve to live in this world.

they basically try to provocke me, i don't want to say it but also poison me (they can easily get people to give them recordings of the food i buy and then get someone to place something inside, they have access to my house so when i am gone they can enter, they stalk me and point out my mistakes and describe them wrongly so that others get false assumptions.

their goal is to make me commit suicide, to leave me deprived of all men and money, to make sure i never achieve a higher or any kind of education for that matter, to basically hide he truth about themselves which i pretty much know in order to have it all.

so yeah. their goal is to strip me of everything out of some sort of sadistic desire, anger or fear. i am not sure about why they hate me yet.

but basically their goal is to prevent self actualization and make me appear either like a liar or fool if i start complaining about them to people and to then accusse me of malicious gossip for which i would have to pay dearly. they also want the stuff and perception of me to remain low and even lower so that i am not allowed to associate with anyone except from a place of powerlessness like a slave or pacient or prisoner.

what else can i say, i don't know. i just can't do anything about it cause they are like my parents. they have that much control over my life. it is like the past just repeats itself and i know what went wrong in it to produce bad results, but now again i just have to put up with the beatings metaphorically and for real. physical and emotional abuse at the most sophisticated level i have ever seen.

[Danioover9000]

@at_anchor

2 hours ago, at_anchor said:

@Danioover9000 i don't know if there is advice to be given in my case.

but simply put, people get selfish reasons to be turned against me evrywhere I go. this was not so in the past. 

you have these people who grew up moderately rich or quite lucky that occupy key positions in society. they are not religious or anything like that. totally immoral, but with a face of decency cause they have the power to make themselves appear like they are good.

on the other hand, they have an enemy, me. with fale evidence, distorted claims of what happend, they go about, scheaming with others and making me appear like a devil or person who does not deserve to live in this world.

they basically try to provocke me, i don't want to say it but also poison me (they can easily get people to give them recordings of the food i buy and then get someone to place something inside, they have access to my house so when i am gone they can enter, they stalk me and point out my mistakes and describe them wrongly so that others get false assumptions.

their goal is to make me commit suicide, to leave me deprived of all men and money, to make sure i never achieve a higher or any kind of education for that matter, to basically hide he truth about themselves which i pretty much know in order to have it all.

so yeah. their goal is to strip me of everything out of some sort of sadistic desire, anger or fear. i am not sure about why they hate me yet.

but basically their goal is to prevent self actualization and make me appear either like a liar or fool if i start complaining about them to people and to then accusse me of malicious gossip for which i would have to pay dearly. they also want the stuff and perception of me to remain low and even lower so that i am not allowed to associate with anyone except from a place of powerlessness like a slave or pacient or prisoner.

what else can i say, i don't know. i just can't do anything about it cause they are like my parents. they have that much control over my life. it is like the past just repeats itself and i know what went wrong in it to produce bad results, but now again i just have to put up with the beatings metaphorically and for real. physical and emotional abuse at the most sophisticated level i have ever seen.

   So, you don't want advice, but instead to post and vent out your frustrations here, and you're curious of other's views?

   Mine is to be careful how you donate, who you donate to, and to look after yourself first before you donate. Makes zero sense to donate when you're low income and need the money yourself.

[at_anchor]

@Danioover9000  thanks. that is kind of correct unfortunately. sorry for that. 

i have another frustration that I will go vent in my journal conversation_with_Being now.

i mean I would love to get advice, I just know that advice I need is kind of technical and a lot of that technical advice, as well as oversight, maybe safety and extracation from here. that isn't gonna happen, cause I'm not some kind of a hot and famous You Tuber with abs that everyone cares for and trusts and feels kind of beneficial to be around and associate.

Edited April 9, 2023 by at_anchor