A Bit Jealous Of Girls

[Emerald]

55 minutes ago, Lila9 said:

In general, most women aren't successful instagram influencers or anything like Kim Kardashian, they work hard in regular jobs and get paid less than men, work on their small business, study, work in the household and raise children. 

 

I think they’re only counting the hottest women as women here.

So, when they say “women”, they’re only talking about a fraction of a percentage of women.

They don’t really see regular women as women.

And they take a cartoon caricature of how the top 1% of hot women live their lives, and they envy that.

And they claim things like,  “women just float through life” or “women live life on easy mode”… which isn’t true.

And they have no empathy or understanding for what it’s like to be a woman.

And women will pick up on this through tells in their speech and gestures about their notions about women.

And then they’ll wonder why they struggle with finding a girlfriend.

[something_else]

36 minutes ago, Emerald said:

And it’s honestly silly the idea that attractive women don’t have to work or develop character. They’re living life just like everyone else.

I agree with a lot of what you’ve said except this. Attractive women absolutely have the option to live life without developing any character or personality. Even moderately good looking girls can do it. There are no shortage of love-starved desperate horny men with cash to spare. It’s obviously not likely to be a healthy dynamic but it is an option to survive with minimal work.

Good looking born moderately to very rich guys can pretty much do the same in terms of coasting through life.

And really, who can blame either of them?

Both can choose to work, and develop character and live a fulfilling life, and plenty of both groups do, but they don’t really have to if they don’t want and that fact would change someone’s approach to life a lot.

I’d wager that the thought of “well if I don’t succeed in life with what I want to do I can always set up shop in someone else’s” has occurred as a thought in every attractive women. It’s pure human survival nature. You got given a gift by nature and your brain is hardwired to leverage that. Just knowing that option is available to you would make you behave very differently even if you didn’t follow through with it.

It’s very similar to guys born with a trust fund or wealthy parents. Yea they go to uni, study, and get jobs but in the back of their mind they always know if push comes to shove they’re going to be fine.

Edited March 21, 2023 by something_else

[Optimized Life]

On 18/03/2023 at 1:14 PM, Something Funny said:

I wish I didn't have to push myself, get out of my comfort zone, work super hard on my confidence, social skills, becoming a millionaire (exaggerating here for a dramatic effect), etc., just to feel like I finally deserve some love and attention.

And what you REALLY mean is ;

I wish I didn't stop avoiding doing all this and running away from my greatness, because the avoidance leaves me in a perpetual uncomfortable state of anxiety, self hatred and dissatisfaction. 

And because embracing the path would ironically feel less heavy and painful than not doing the work.

I feel extremely anxious if I'm not either : A - working hard (Business job hobbies) or B - Socializing/dating/practicing PUA 

If i'm not doing A or B and I'm just "durping" around it feels very very painful and heavy, it is fucking torture. I did it this evening and I am not satisfied, I am going to have to study and work & sleep a little later because if I don't I won't sleep anyway because not doing work poisons the body & mind with fear, worry and self doubt, that is unquestionable. Where as DOING THE WORK = FREEDOM, If you keep going long enough, you have to have enough persistence to wait it out long enough such that the work can become enjoyable, because pua starts off also akward and painful, and I am still in this phase after doing it for months/years on and off, but had I ploughed through it like a soldier, and literally done it every day for the past 3 - 6 months I'm sure I'd be out of that nasty stage already, the harder you work the faster you'll reach that road to freedom, so get ahead in the race before it's too late. 

Edited March 21, 2023 by Optimized Life

[PenguinPablo]

1 hour ago, Emerald said:

The majority of women are not on Onlyfans.

worded that part poorly. I just meant the majority of girls doing only fans dont make a lot.

Saw a few girls reported they are in the top 3% on OF and only make $3.5-4k / month (4k month is decent in America but certainly not for being top 3% in a business). 

It's just such a silly thing for men to focus on. And is not even remotely close to reality when men complain about this. Particularly when it's the top 1% bringing in significant income from this, while 90% of girls can merely use it for additional income.

Edited March 21, 2023 by PenguinPablo

[Emerald]

26 minutes ago, PenguinPablo said:

worded that part poorly. I just meant the majority of girls doing only fans dont make a lot.

Saw a few girls reported they are in the top 3% on OF and only make $3.5-4k / month (4k month is decent in America but certainly not for being top 3% in a business). 

It's just such a silly thing for men to focus on. And is not even remotely close to reality when men complain about this. Particularly when it's the top 1% bringing in significant income from this, while 90% of girls can merely use it for additional income.

That makes sense that most women wouldn’t be making a lot on Onlyfans. Too much competition.

[Emerald]

59 minutes ago, Squeekytoy said:

That does sound like a shallow God awful experience. But can you also see how shallow you are portraying men to be? Like the only possible dynamic there is gold digger and sugar daddy. That's a pretty screwed up view of the world if you ask me.

By and large, men and women take care of eachother, and they each do it in their own way, that's all.

 

I’m not specifically saying it’s a gold digger and sugar daddy situation.

I mean that it sounds shallow and transactional… and generally un-gratifying.

It feels like two people mutually using each other to feel good about themselves as opposed to developing a warm organic relationship between two ordinary people.

It’s seems too achievement oriented and meritocratic to feel substantial.

[Roy]

42 minutes ago, PenguinPablo said:

It's just such a silly thing for men to focus on.

I think the guys that are angry about it are mad about the fact they have to trade time/labor/skill for their money, while sex work (OnlyFans/Online) for women is basically free money by virtue of being born pretty. The investment of make-up/effort to get dressed and take a few pictures/videos is probably less than a 20th of the effort of grinding minimum wage at McDonalds or wherever.

It's a low consciousness judgement of other low consciousness people, because you swap men for that position and 90% of them will do the same thing.

Most people wouldn't hesitate to take the path of least resistance and free resources. Hell, even hard working developed people are aiming for that. The entire economy and idea of "investing" and owning property to rent out to people is a pyramid scheme hoping that you can one day sit back and relax while your "money makes you money" lmao.

[Something Funny]

@Optimized Life thanks,  that's an awesome perspective. 

[Hardkill]

5 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

I'm sure those girls work pretty hard.

But they get paid disproportionally for their work, and they get many opportunities a guy would never get.

Many people work hard and don't get far.

Yeah, it's really a travesty of justice.

 

[Something Funny]

5 hours ago, Emerald said:

I’m sure that game is helpful.

But the real issue that keeps men lonely isn’t lack of game… or some nonsense that Karmadhi was saying about needing to be in the top 10% of men to get a girlfriend.

The real problem is a lack of social outlets… which then behooves men to learn game and do cold approach in lieu of a healthy social life.

That’s why I recommended creating a social circle. You can just be an average (or even below average) guy and not learn much game and still get a girlfriend if you have a social circle.

I know this because my high school and college social circle consisted of a lot of nerdy guys and girls. And none of them were unable to find partners despite the fact that many of them lacked in social graces and/or looks.

And the connection is honestly just better and more organic with social circles.

If we were living in a time where society wasn’t so atomized and online, the men who are on here that are complaining about not being able to get girlfriends would have already had some luck.

 

Okay let's say I would be open to trying this "just socialize" appoach. But here are questions and concerns that I have about it:

Lets say my hobby is climbing. If I oush myself out of my comfort zone I could probably find myself a group of friends, like 10 people, at my climbing gym and hang out with them.

1. Am I supposed to have a social circle of a hundred + people and spend half of my waking time on it? The social circle of 10 friends would have 2-3 girls in it let's say. This just seems like not enough volume. What if none of them are attracted to me or I am not attracted to them?

2. If I can't find a partner within my social circle am I supposed to ditch it and set up a new one? For example in this case, am I supposed to find a new hobby for myself, lol? I don't like that idea.

3. Let's say that I am lucky and I find a gf from my social circle. What happens if we break up? Hanging out together in that social circle would get super awkward for us. Once again, am I supposed to ditch it now? Or am I supposed to get a new gf from the same social circle, considering how we would all know wach other?

4. Am I supposed to now view every girl within my social circle as a dating opportunity? I don't like it becuase it kills the idea that man and woman can be just good friends and not have any hidden intentions behind their biceness/ friendliness and not play dating games with each other.

Seems like a really weird situation full of gossiping,  games, and manipulation. Comparee to that pickup seems like a much more authentic and honest option.

5 hours ago, Emerald said:

And the connection is honestly just better and more organic with social circles.

My dad met both my mom and my stepmom by cold approaching them basically. And in both cases was able to create a fine and healthy family out of it. So I don't know why girls are shitting on cold approach so much.

[Andrey]

8 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Many people work hard and don't get far.

For example - me. TA-DAA! 

[Jacob Morres]

10 hours ago, PenguinPablo said:

simultaneously positions men into the victim of the two sexes

 

Hey js men and women have their unique privileges .It's not a one or another thing

Not related to the topic tho js 

 

Though related to this topic, I do wonder what the most conscious and accurate opinions are here ? 

Edited March 21, 2023 by Jacob Morres

[Bobby_2021]

Onlyfans did a brilliant marketing campaign. They bought houses for some girls and asked them to post it on social media as if they were earnings from their OF content. Now desperate single moms will strip on camera thinking they will afford a house one day.

[Leo Gura]

The bottom line is this: there are definite perks to being a hot girl, but there are downsides too, and overall they balance out so you shouldn't feel too envious.

It's like playing an RPG character. Every skill point comes with trade-offs. The sexy elf is not better than the ugly orc if the game is well-designed. That's what makes replaying the game so fun.

Edited March 21, 2023 by Leo Gura

[Miguel1]

13 hours ago, Emerald said:

Leo was just talking about the perks of simply existing in the world and having big boobs… not about joining onlyfans or doing some other form of sex work.

The majority of women wouldn’t be okay with doing sex work.

Here are Leo's words that I am using in this context:

''A pair of tits is not worth billions of dollars. But it is worth tens to hundreds of thousands. Maybe even millions if you play it right.''

Obviously, you are not making 100s of thousands and millions if all you are doing is just sitting at home with your ass, or just standing pretty in the streets.

But if you play it right (read: smart & hard), you can make millions with your boobs.

I could imagine that there are cases where a really good-looking girl can make millions by just being smart and cunning, and not necessarily even having to work that hard at all. But these cases are probably so rare, that we don't need to really talk about them here.

[Miguel1]

10 hours ago, Emerald said:

The real problem is a lack of social outlets… which then behooves men to learn game and do cold approach in lieu of a healthy social life.

That’s why I recommended creating a social circle. You can just be an average (or even below average) guy and not learn much game and still get a girlfriend if you have a social circle.

Go deeper. How do you build a social circle? By cold approaching people. And cold approaching is game itself already.

Also, running a social circle itself is also game, if done correctly. If all you are doing is just being passively in the social circle without any intentions, any leadership, any proactiveness, and without any game, then you are mostly just wasting your time, both in terms of getting intimacy and in terms of growth.

Learning game is crucial for men's development. Healthy game.

I say this from 10 years of experience in practicing inner and outer game, indirectly and directly (being in relationships & being single in the field).

I have studied a ton of guys who practices game and who doesn't. If they don't practice game and they are not a natural, then there is a huge difference (charisma, attractiveness, results etc.) compared to the ones who do practice game.

There is a reason Leo has spent 5-10 years practicing this, even though he could have been spending that time doing much more meaningful stuff.

Edited March 21, 2023 by Migue Lonas

[Emerald]

4 hours ago, Migue Lonas said:

Here are Leo's words that I am using in this context:

''A pair of tits is not worth billions of dollars. But it is worth tens to hundreds of thousands. Maybe even millions if you play it right.''

Obviously, you are not making 100s of thousands and millions if all you are doing is just sitting at home with your ass, or just standing pretty in the streets.

But if you play it right (read: smart & hard), you can make millions with your boobs.

I could imagine that there are cases where a really good-looking girl can make millions by just being smart and cunning, and not necessarily even having to work that hard at all. But these cases are probably so rare, that we don't need to really talk about them here.

But Leo and I weren’t talking about work.

We were talking about existing as an attractive woman with big tits and getting freebies.

Sex work is work… not a freebie.

[Miguel1]

28 minutes ago, Emerald said:

But Leo and I weren’t talking about work.

We were talking about existing as an attractive woman with big tits and getting freebies.

At this point, to me, this just seems like word games. I seriously don't think that Leo is talking about girls getting hundreds of Ks and millions just by purely existing and breathing the air. They gotta put in some work, if not into practical work, then at least into being smart and playing their cards right, strategic-wise, cunning-wise, manipulative-wise.

You can put it this way: as a hot girl, you are given opportunities that you wouldn't otherwise get. And these opportunities can be worth millions. It is upto you, whether you capitalize on them or not. If you do, you gotta put in some work. But without these opportunities to begin with, no amount of work is gonna bring you millions.

[Jacob Morres]

17 hours ago, Emerald said:

they have no empathy for what it’s like to be a woman

then they’ll wonder why they struggle with finding a girlfriend

almost never the issue 

You don't even need that much empathy for what its like to be a woman to get a gf 

But wouldn't recommend that (for obv reasons)

 

Imo the receipe is:

1. Be detached and patient 

2. Work on yourself, increasing your value 

3. Develop great social, and flirting skills 

4. Use some system where you are interacting with girls 

5. Play the numbers game 

 

Edited March 21, 2023 by Jacob Morres

[BringBackBeige]

There's a lot of focus in media and culture today to lift up women, which is part of what you're observing. But if you were receiving it you'd see how hollow that support really is.

Your struggles would be different but you'd struggle just as much if you were a girl.