The Journey- sharing/advice

[Twega]

First, I'll try to add helpful information and insights, and not just make it about me (but it kinda is, hehe)

1. Backstory

I discovered Leos's content about four years ago when I was 21. It started as an intellectual activity, but the more I soaked in Leo's thoughts and insights, I had over the years slowly transformed the way my mind works. I am forever grateful to Actualized.org for being a catalyst for change. However, I am still on this journey. Many more miles ahead. Much growth was achieved, and even more so is needed. I found the path; this I know. Yet, I don't know where it's going. I finished the LP course three years ago during my last semester of university. It gave me so much clarity, and I'm confident I found my LP. I retook the course couple of months ago as I feel like I changed and grew, my LP/values are about the same, but I iterated it even more and refreshed my mind. During these past few years, I have been obsessed with LP. Yet, simultaneously, I was dealing with all sorts of issues (mental and physical health, relationship, feeling lost, feeling like life was passing away): Can anyone relate to this emotion in particular?

"Mono no aware (物の哀れ),[a] literally "the pathos of things," and also translated as "an empathy toward things," or "a sensitivity to ephemera," is a Japanese idiom for the awareness of impermanence (無常, mujō), or transience of things, and both a transient gentle sadness (or wistfulness) at their passing as well as a longer, deeper gentle sadness about this state being the reality of life."

 

I slacked off sometimes; I fell back into old habits. Backsliding, ego-backlash-- you guys know this; it is inevitable. With each backslides and the ensuing BACKUPS, I got a bit better, inching closer and closer toward what I seek. That's the story I tell myself. Stories are so important; we are all creating a story, your Life story.

Article: Selves Creating Stories Creating Selves: A Process Model of Self-Development (https://sci-hub.wf/10.1177/1088868307301034)

 

2. Life purpose, Business, and Life

Continuing my story, I have had experiences where I am convinced that the universe was directly helping me (in very weird and synchronistic ways). Opportunities manifested, the right books appeared, and signs and signals were given. However, not all were seen and heeded by me. For example, I experienced getting paid to do my LP! I actually got paid to do something so niche I never thought anyone would be interested. However, it opened my eyes to the possibility of "Hey, this is fucking possible." I had this experience twice last year. Most days, I felt too overwhelmed, sad, lost, and confused. However, some days I experience stuff like this: working on a project, journaling meaningful ideas and insights, adventure, doing something skillfully/creatively, or being very productive.

These days are so important. These are the days that reaffirm our inclinations toward self-development. These are the days that allow us a glimpse of the future we seek. These days will enable us to become fully present in what we're doing to enjoy the life we already have and cherish the only moment that ever exists. These are the days we live for.

The journey of Mastery/Life purpose is meaningful; It's way more than just making a living. Mastering yourself is loving yourself.

"Though you can love what you do not master, you cannot master what you do not love." -Mokokoma Mokhonoana

 

But this life-purpose business has made me more anxious and serious. It's all I think about. I'm 25 and feel like I'm running out of time. I am continuously seeking and seeking. So I've been trying to change how I view this situation; I want it to be more playful.

I really recommend this channel. Solid, and it has helped me a lot. He also mentioned listening to Actualzied.org (so I think you will like the content).

 

"The untuned mind receives no signal from the universe." -Michael Bassey Johnson

I've been trying to tune in more. But life is so overwhelming. Especially work and survival. How can we tune in more? What is tuning in?

We mean observing, listening, seeing, looking into, and being curious about. However, we cannot tune in without first tuning out. We tune into something by first tuning out whatever is not allowing us to tune in, in the first place (i.e., work). Again we see the exquisite balance of seemingly opposing acts, tune in/tune out. Tune out the noise to tune in to creativity, insight, and wisdom. In our age especially, this is the most underrated skill, the skill of conscious awareness, focus, and filtering out the unnecessary.

"Keep your mouth shut; guard your senses. And life will be ever full. Open your mouth, always be busy, and life is beyond hope." -Tao Te Ching

 

3. Conclusion

This is where I am at in life. I'm seeking to actualize my potential and fulfill my life's purpose. Even though I grew a lot, I feel more lost sometimes. I'm struggling with work, and I'm starting to hate it. I feel stuck. But I've also had the best experiences of my life these past two years. I am genuinely grateful for who I am at this moment, but I am also seeking to kill some parts of me and transform. To be content with yourself and earnestly seek personal transformation is the balance that must be struck.

Any insights or experiences of your own?

Any advice for me?

How do you navigate this terrain?

Any helpful stories you'd like to share?

 

I needed to get this out of my chest to people who know what I'm talking about.  I also hope you found something useful. Thanks.