Women treat MEN the way men treat JOBS: how relationship goals change the dating

[Gesundheit2]

20 minutes ago, supremeyingyang said:

I guess they mean with 'unconditional love' that most men would stick with their first GF forever, if given the chance. Then they be left alone and develop the laundry list of traits of their next partner, hey paradoxical but why not. Sadly most stay at this point indefinetly. I don't know why. Do you have a theory?

• If they were selfless and unconditionally loving, they wouldn't take it personally and therefore wouldn't get hurt.
• This goes both ways. Some men who are "players" leave their very loyal girlfriends, so how is it even possible to make such generalizations about how love works depending on gender?
• What about trans people and bisexuals and other gender identities? Are they selfish or selfless?
• It's too silly to discuss this.

Edited March 4, 2023 by Gesundheit2

[supremeyingyang]

16 minutes ago, Gesundheit2 said:

• If they were selfless and unconditionally loving, they wouldn't take it personally and therefore wouldn't get hurt.

As I wrote I don't think they mean the same as the dictionary meaning of 'unconditional love' when they use the phrase.

16 minutes ago, Gesundheit2 said:

• This goes both ways. Some men who are "players" leave their very loyal girlfriends, so how is it even possible to make such generalizations about how love works depending on gender?

It's just probability if you use a narrow definition, like women in the west with a middle class background with a college education and a political leftist preference will be more likely to act like this in a situation like that.. But nobody listens to that. Obviously is that kind of generalization subcomplex.

16 minutes ago, Gesundheit2 said:

• What about trans people and bisexuals and other gender identities? Are they selfish or selfless?

I don't care as I don't think this characteristics of being 'not binary' or 'not straight' and 'not gay'  are the single biggest determinant of how either of the demographics you named love. Maybe I'm wrong with my assumption, I don't know - are are there articles on this?

16 minutes ago, Gesundheit2 said:

• It's too silly to discuss this.

On this subcomplex level like in the video indeed.

Edited March 4, 2023 by supremeyingyang

[supremeyingyang]

@Gesundheit2

"Men who reported engaging in coercive strategies were more likely to endorse Ludus (game-playing love) love style, and less likely to endorse Agape (unconditional love) love style than noncoercive men. Men who reported love styles of Storge (a friendship-first attitude toward love) and Pragma (a selective, practical approach toward love) were more likely to report being victims of sexually coercive behaviors. Those men who reported being sexually victimized were also more likely to report using coercive strategies. The results can further our understanding of male victimization and usage of sexually coercive strategies." By BRENDA L. RUSSELL & DEBRA L. OSWALD https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/pdf/10.1177/0886260502017003003

But this won't tell us anything about Wamen. I don't find anything, but maybe this novel will tell use something that science and Youtube Gurus can't?

“I’m the Bitch that Makes You a Man”: Conditional Love as Female Vengeance in Gillian Flynn’s Gone Girl
By Patrick Osborne http://genderforum.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/06/3_Osborne_GG_Final.pdf

"her [the main protagonist] deviance is a reaction to a patriarchal social structure that reinforces gendered
illusions of self-actualization and allows male entitlement to remain unchallenged."

=> Isn't that we talk about? Men being challenged and that they fail miserable?

 

 

 

 

Edited March 4, 2023 by supremeyingyang
More Info

[Gesundheit2]

20 minutes ago, supremeyingyang said:

It's just probability if you use a narrow definition, like women in the west with a middle class background with a college education and a political leftist preference will be more likely to act like this in a situation like that.. But nobody listens to that. Obviously is that kind of generalization subcomplex.

Assuming this is largely correct, once you've identified the problematic demographic, avoid it and you'll be fine.

[Devin]

"Wives aren't just getting fed up with husbands. They're also walking out on their wives. According to data from the U.K.'s Office for National Statistics, lesbian couples make up slightly more than half of the same-sex marriages in England and Wales, but they account for roughly three-quarters of same-sex divorces."

https://www.divorcenet.com/states/nationwide/the_walkaway_wife_syndrome

(cue postmodernist head spinning and mindlessly parroting talking points)

Edited March 4, 2023 by Devin

[supremeyingyang]

16 minutes ago, Devin said:

"Wives aren't just getting fed up with husbands. They're also walking out on their wives. According to data from the U.K.'s Office for National Statistics, lesbian couples make up slightly more than half of the same-sex marriages in England and Wales, but they account for roughly three-quarters of same-sex divorces."

https://www.divorcenet.com/states/nationwide/the_walkaway_wife_syndrome

Yeah and there are according to the articles causes why straight and gay women become 'walkaway wife's':

• lack of commitment
• incompatibility and growing apart
• communication problems
• extramarital affairs
• financial incompatibility (money disagreements)
• substance abuse
• domestic abuse, and
• conflicts over family responsibilities.

incompatibility and growing apart and financial incompatibility are 'just' signs of philosophical differences. The rest is exactly what I observe and women warn their man excessively (ok, maybe not in a domestic abuse situation) and tell explicitly what they want. It's time for man as a demographic to mature like women did with feminism, not to just become Anti feminists, Allies who do as they are told instead of thinking for themselves or remain just Indifferent NPCs.

Edited March 4, 2023 by supremeyingyang
correction

[Devin]

Just now, supremeyingyang said:

Yeah and there are according to the articles causes why straight and gay women become 'walkaway wife's':

• lack of commitment
• incompatibility and growing apart
• communication problems
• extramarital affairs
• financial incompatibility (money disagreements)
• substance abuse
• domestic abuse, and
• conflicts over family responsibilities.

incompatibility and growing apart and financial incompatibility are 'just' signs of philosophical differences. The rest is exactly what I observe and women warn their man excessively (ok, maybe not in a domestic abuse situation) and tell explicitly what they want. It's time for man as a demographic to mature like women did with feminism, not to just become Antifeminists, Allies who do like they'd been told instead of thinking for themself or remain just Indifferent.

I don't think you understand the video, you're speaking as if it says women walkaway for fun.

[supremeyingyang]

6 minutes ago, Devin said:

I don't think you understand the video, you're speaking as if it says women walkaway for fun.

No, I want to state the opposite: Women walk away from long-term relationships, because they can't stand the paralysis of men anymore. They generally try it for a long to time to get their partner understand this and change for their better (mens) - it's not fun to women.

Regarding the video, if you mean the video from the OP - I get what he is saying that it is not personal, but I also wrote here that I find that statement is non-sense. To me it's not a useful generalization and if you act on this it'll hurt you more than help you. Or what do you mean by saying I do not understand the video, @Devin?

Edited March 4, 2023 by supremeyingyang
addition

[Devin]

7 minutes ago, supremeyingyang said:

No, I want to state the opposite: Women walk away from long-term relationships, because they can't stand the paralysis of men anymore. They generally try it for a long to time to get their partner understand this and change for their better (mens) - it's not fun to women.

That's consistent with the video, you're arguing against a strawman.

[supremeyingyang]

13 minutes ago, Devin said:

That's consistent with the video, you're arguing against a strawman.

I don't argued against the video with the phrase you referred to at all, I talked about what I picture as a more precise description of what is going on. So it's no wonder that it is from you perspective consistent as you could argue it enhances and refines the thesis of the video (which I said is too general to be of any value )

I mean that women leave their man if they are too ignorant and resistant to change. The 'women treat men as men treat jobs' thesis is non-sense in it's purest form to me as I stated in my second post here.

 

Edited March 4, 2023 by supremeyingyang
addition

[zurew]

Walking away from a relationship and changing partners is much more correlated with having leverage in a relationship (the more leverage and opportunity you have the more likely you will execute on it and leave ) and has almost nothing to do with gender.

If there is a high quality men, that men will drop his partner super fast if he feels like it, because that guy will know that he can find another partner in a second . You can say that on average women may have more leverage, but again thats not because of gender, but more because how the current dating dynamics work and because most men are low quality and have nothing to contribute.

[Devin]

7 minutes ago, zurew said:

Walking away from a relationship and changing partners is much more correlated with having leverage in a relationship (the more leverage and opportunity you have the more likely you will execute on it and leave ) and has almost nothing to do with gender.

If there is a high quality men, that men will drop his partner super fast if he feels like it, because that guy will know that he can find another partner in a second . You can say that on average women may have more leverage, but again thats not because of gender, but more because how the current dating dynamics work and because most men are low quality and have nothing to contribute.

This is completely self contradictory bullshit.

You say men can't upgrade because they're mostly low quality but women can, who are they upgrading to? You just said "most men are low quality".

Edited March 4, 2023 by Devin

[Bobby_2021]

18 minutes ago, zurew said:

most men are low quality and have nothing to contribute

What exactly does women contribute in progressive modern relationships? 

Edited March 4, 2023 by Bobby_2021

[zurew]

8 minutes ago, Devin said:

This is completely self contradictory bullshit.

Where is the contradiction?

8 minutes ago, Devin said:

You say men can't upgrade because they're mostly low quality but women can, who are they upgrading to? You just said "most men are low quality".

Where did I say that men can't upgrade? I said the opposite, men can and should upgrade themselves, because in the current market dynamics "I am earning the money" won't be enough to have leverage in your relationship. Yes indeed most men are low quality because most of them don't earn much money and even if they do, they lack social skills, they don't properly clean themselves , they don't know how to talk to people, most of them don't know how to take care of themselves without their mother or without their partner doing all the housework and cleaning and cooking for them. Thats just the reality.

[supremeyingyang]

6 minutes ago, Devin said:

This is completely self contradictory bullshit.

You say men can't upgrade because they're mostly low quality but women can, who are they upgrading to? You just said "most men are low quality".

He does not talk about upgrading, but if women want to upgrade they upgrade to those men which are not 'most men'. You also can be low value and still be better compared to the former partner of the woman in question. I don't see a contradiction in @zurews argumentation.

[supremeyingyang]

1 minute ago, Bobby_2021 said:

What exactly does women contribute in progressive modern relationships? 

The point in progressive modern relationships is that there isn't a single answer to this anymore.

[zurew]

Just now, Bobby_2021 said:

What exactly does women contribute in modern relationships? 

An average women can contribute a pussy and according to the current dating dynamics that is more than enough to have leverage over most men. My argument about "contribution" has everthing to do with in the context of the current dating dynamics and nothing to do with putting an objective value or judgement on who has what value.

[Devin]

OMG ?

[Devin]

       You people should be ashamed of yourselves, you're trashing this guys thread without even trying to understand the video, some of you admittedly didn't even watch it and trash it, this is fucking disgusting.

The video is a PhD Psychologist, it's not like it's Tate.

Edited March 4, 2023 by Devin

[supremeyingyang]

8 minutes ago, Devin said:

       You people should be ashamed of yourselves, you're trashing this guys thread without even trying to understand the video, some of you admittedly didn't even watch it and trash it, this is fucking disgusting.

The video is a Phd. Psychologist, it's not like it's Tate.

I like how you simulate how someone would answer to our argumentation using ad hominem and appeal to authority. Of course that is not your real reply, which is great. So what is your argument against what we wrote?

Edited March 4, 2023 by supremeyingyang
addition