Anima Issue in Men - Marie Louise Von Franz

[Emerald]

Quick snippet of a Jungian video.

I post this because it is the true root cause of many of the woes that men express in relation to dating, sex, and relationships.

They’re all textbook Anima issues.

The Anima is what Jung called the Inner woman in every man… while women have an Animus

And if you resolve this Anima issue, interactions with women will become easier and you’ll have more security about your own masculinity.

The video is of Marie Louise Von Franz (a popular Jungian) talking about an issue of stunted Anima integration in men that she witnessed in her career as a Jungian therapist.

Anima possession comes up as a result of men repressing, denying, and having shame toward their Feminine side.

And the harder he resists, the tighter the Anima holds onto him and posses him. And the more the possessive Anima is projected outward onto women… making talking to women terrifying and triggering.

[mr_engineer]

What is your solution? How do you stop being scared of your feminine side? 

[Jacob Morres]

What do you define as the feminine? 

Kindness, empathy, vulnerability, compassion etc.? 

 

[Emerald]

8 minutes ago, mr_engineer said:

What is your solution? How do you stop being scared of your feminine side? 

A big part of it is to drop resistance to the Feminine principle in general.

This is a subtractive process… not an additive process. The idea is not to make yourself be Feminine but to allow what is already there by dropping resistance to and finding reverence for the Feminine principle in all people and things.

This would include qualities like vulnerability, emotionality, receptivity, surrender, non-linearity, and the non-rational.

And to be willing to see these qualities in yourself and to allow the world to see them too.

This includes developing a relationship to the depths of the Unconscious mind.

And this also means not holding on so tightly to the identity of Masculinity… even though counterintuitively this will allow you to be more in touch with the deep unpretended Masculine.

This is also a subtractive process.

So, that means not being so attached and identified with things like strength, invulnerability, unyieldingness, and rationality and allowing yourself to experience the opposite in yourself with full acceptance.

And a big part of the Feminine is internality in contrast to Masculine externality. 

So to integrate the Feminine is to make decisions from the inside… not the outside.

You consult your personal sovereignty and intuition to make decisions, and you don’t outsource the decision making process to the external world of rules, authority figures, shoulda, and should nots.

[Emerald]

17 minutes ago, Jacob Morres said:

What do you define as the feminine? 

Kindness, empathy, vulnerability, compassion etc.? 

 

Kindness and compassion are actually in the Masculine principle because they have to do with GIVING love.

They are reflective of the Lover archetype which is Masculine and gives love unconditionally. And the Feminine counterpart is the Beloved archetype that receives love unconditionally.

The Masculine extends love outward by putting forth the most vulnerable parts of itself.

The Feminine is more about receiving and being (as opposed to doing). It is like empathy, listening, yielding, surrendering, holding space, and intuition.

It is also non-linear, mysterious, non-rational, emotional, and Earthy… in contrast to the Masculine principled qualities…. Linear, clear, rational, logical, and abstract.

[mr_engineer]

And, how does this solve men's problems in relation to dating, sex and relationships? 

[Jacob Morres]

@Emerald very interesting thanks for sharing 

i think thats important for development in general - what's life without those qualities you listed? 

though have you seen this video? curious on your thoughts. skip to 11:08 

 

Edited March 3, 2023 by Jacob Morres

[Emerald]

26 minutes ago, Jacob Morres said:

@Emerald very interesting thanks for sharing 

i think thats important for development in general - what's life without those qualities you listed? 

though have you seen this video? skip to 11:08 

 

I agree with most of the things in the video.

If you look from the perspective of power structures (which are part of the Masculine Principle), men have an advantage because we live in a pro-masculine principle and anti-feminine principle society.

And Masculinity is looked upon with more respect which gives men who live up to those culturally Masculine standards significant advantages of power.

This is what 1st and 2nd wave Feminism was primarily focused on… getting parity with men in terms of power. And women’s core wound is powerlessness.

But if we look from the perspective of the Feminine principle, men and women are both looked down on for expressing Femininity.

But men are often much more harshly socially punished for showing culturally or archetypally Feminine traits. And they  are assumed to be above all that emotional Feminine nonsense.

And unlike women’s barriers to the Masculine, which are more focused on because it’s seen as depriving women  of something good..,

… men’s barriers to the Feminine aren’t as focused on because many people still see this as men lowering themselves in terms of respectability.

It is commonly thought that the dearth of the Feminine principle is a desirable state and something men should deliberately strip themselves of.

And so, men and boys are taught to be tough and suppress their emotions and never show vulnerability… or they’ll be exiled by other men and laughed at by women.

And this gets absorbed at such a young age that it can really put a little boy at odds with himself and his more vulnerable nature. And this cascades into adulthood if those repressive behaviors aren’t unlearned.

Edited March 3, 2023 by Emerald

[SamC]

I've said this before and I will say it again. Masculinity is femeninty on steroids. When you fully integrate your femenine is when you awaken to true Masculinity which is Self love.

[meta_male]

7 hours ago, mr_engineer said:

How do you stop being scared of your feminine side? 

What scares you about being feminine?

[mr_engineer]

2 hours ago, meta_male said:

What scares you about being feminine?

The OP asserted that 'the fact that men are scared of their feminine side is the problem'. So, I'm asking for further elaboration on that. 

I'm really not sure what 'feminine' means and what it means in the context of men. I'm getting some education here! 

[NoSelfSelf]

In my opinion its complete opposite, males are supressing their masculine side and feminine is dominating ,thats why there is problem talking to them and attracting.

You start to daydream because thats your only option,because nobody teaches you game and get rid of feminine dominating in you, but quick fixes and tricks...

Edited March 3, 2023 by NoSelfSelf

[Loving Radiance]

@Emerald  I really appreciate your work and I feel that your content is currently more important for me (shadow work & Anima integration) in this stage of life than Leo's ^^

 

On a side note, it may be a mistake that a politics video is in your shadow playlist?

Edit: This may also be not right

Edited March 3, 2023 by Loving Radiance

[caspex]

1 hour ago, NoSelfSelf said:

In my opinion its complete opposite, males are supressing their masculine side and feminine is dominating ,thats why there is problem talking to them and attracting.

You start to daydream because thats your only option,because nobody teaches you game and get rid of feminine dominating in you, but quick fixes and tricks...

I agree with this. I would say what the OP outlined leads to hate and lack of empathy towards women rather than fear. If you are scared of talking to women that's most definitely an issue with your masculine side. You can have the utmost empathy and love towards women but still be scared of approaching them. This is because they are too mysterious and you don't want to take the initiative of delving into the unknown to demystify and normalize a woman.

And many men have both the issues at the same time. They repress their feminine while at the same time being underdeveloped in their masculine.

[Emerald]

39 minutes ago, Loving Radiance said:

@Emerald  I really appreciate your work and I feel that your content is currently more important for me (shadow work & Anima integration) in this stage of life that Leo's ^^

 

On a side note, it may be a mistake that a politics video is in your shadow playlist?

Edit: This may also be not right

Haha! Thank you for letting me know. I must have accidentally added it to my playlist. Glad it wasn’t something embarrassing.

Maybe I’ll leave the Turtles video on there as a treat. ?

[Emerald]

23 minutes ago, Swarnim said:

I agree with this. I would say what the OP outlined leads to hate and lack of empathy towards women rather than fear. If you are scared of talking to women that's most definitely an issue with your masculine side. You can have the utmost empathy and love towards women but still be scared of approaching them. This is because they are too mysterious and you don't want to take the initiative of delving into the unknown to demystify and normalize a woman.

And many men have both the issues at the same time. They repress their feminine while at the same time being underdeveloped in their masculine.

@NoSelfSelf It would seem like it’s an issue with Masculinity. But counterintuitively it isn’t. Polarizing ever more into the Masculine just amplifies the issue.

One such reason for this is that attunement to the body is Feminine principled. And social acuity is Feminine principled. And personal sovereignty is internal and thus Feminine principled.

And these Feminine principled qualities are all necessary qualities of a developed man.

So, a man who resists the Feminine will tend to have social struggles and will be very uncharismatic because he doesn’t have good social attunement or body language. And he will come across as having little power because he doesn’t trust himself or look inward for answers. He looks outward to see what he SHOULD be doing.

So, a man who rejects the Feminine and polarizes into the Masculine comes across as nerdy and too logical. Doesn’t pick up on social cues.

Then that nerdy guy goes “I need to become more Masculine and less Feminine!” And he further exacerbates the issue.

Have you noticed that men who hold onto their Masculinity the tightest, tend to come across as the least Masculine?

It’s an issue with pushing away the Feminine internally. And this creates Anima possession where a man starts expressing Shadow Feminine traits.

And he projects the possessive Anima onto women, which make women seem cold, harsh, and super powerful.

This makes him feel powerless to women. And the stronger the repression is the stronger his simultaneous obsession and hatred of the Feminine gets.

And suppressing the Feminine also creates shame in the man when he happens to express something that falls short of the Masculine ideal he’s seeking to emulate.

Edited March 3, 2023 by Emerald

[Emerald]

8 hours ago, SamC said:

I've said this before and I will say it again. Masculinity is femeninty on steroids. When you fully integrate your femenine is when you awaken to true Masculinity which is Self love.

Not sure if I would necessarily say that Masculinity is Femininity on steroids.

It’s a totally different principle that operates off totally different internal logic.

It’s more like the elements of fire and water. Or air and Earth.

They operate very differently from one another. It’s not a manner a degree.

[spiritual memes]

I think men integrating their feminine, is generally frowned upon in society. Feminine men are called weak submissive 'betas' which terrifies any man from expressing any femininity. 

On the other hand the masculine is overemphasized and glorified to excess. There is a wave of hypermasculine influencers who repress their feminine that have become really popular lately. For example Andrew Tate. The general message to young men is: 'be an alpha male, never show any weakness or emotion or you are a loser' which leads to a lot of problems. Not really sure what the solution is.

[Emerald]

Just now, spiritual memes said:

I think men integrating their feminine, is generally frowned upon in society. Feminine men are called weak submissive 'betas' which terrifies any man from expressing any femininity. 

On the other hand the masculine is overemphasized and glorified to excess. There is a wave of hypermasculine influencers who repress their feminine that have become really popular lately. For example Andrew Tate. The general message to young men is: 'be an alpha male, never show any weakness or emotion or you are a loser' which leads to a lot of problems. Not really sure what the solution is.

Yes, that is why. It’s a bit better in general than when I was growing up despite the presence of those online movements. 

But men tend to socially punish one another for deviating from societal expectations around what’s agreed upon as Masculine behavior. I’ll call it Macho instead of Masculinity because it isn’t usually based in the deep Masculine.

And I think the solution is to get men to realize that their Masculinity is something deeper within them and not something that they can “achieve” by becoming Macho.

And in general to get a strong education of what Masculinity and Femininity actually is on the archetypal/energetic level instead of just the cultural level. 

Then, there’s also the issue of how shame-based traumas make boys/men more susceptible to glomming onto Macho influencers who try to sell them a cure for their soul sickness.

 

[spiritual memes]

@Emerald do you think masculine and feminine are mutually exclusive? I.e. integrating feminine makes you less masculine?