Nofap And The Effects Of Porn, Masturbation And Abstinence

[Ayla]

Struggling with Porn? Avoiding real life encounters? 

Here's a safe place to find solutions and safely talk about it. 

Be gentle guys please... there are ladies present  

[Stef]

This thread isn't intended as an addict therapy session. Rather discussing ideas, theories and the effects of porn/masturbation/orgasm/sex/abstinence.

I know this is a very delicate topic for everyone. Why? Because everyone loves to masturbate and nearly everyone is doing it to porn, At this point the two are so deeply ingrained and interconnected that one always goes with the other.

But are we ready for the great porn revolution and the effects it has on our sexuality? The effects of chronic masturbation and over-indulgence in porn are very much real and serious.

 

The Great Porn Experiment

 

Why I stopped watching porn

 

Brief info about me: 25 year old male, stumbled upon porn at the age of 9, started masturbating shortly afterwards. I never really thought about the effects it had on me but I always felt lethargic and unmotivated after a session. One day I realized I haven't had a girlfriend for 4 years and I'm basically a virgin. So I decided to give NoFap a try.

Personally, this has been the biggest stepping stone in my development and what got me into self-improvement in the first place.

The benefits are great. Some of them that I personally experienced after abstaining for a few weeks/months:

• More confidence
• More energy
• Better focus
• Better memory
• Natural charisma
• Clearer skin
• Better sleep
• Deeper voice
• Self-discipline and willpower
• Stopped drinking sodas
• Cut out junk food for the most part
• Eating healthy
• Started reading books again
• Working out and getting into the best shape of my life
• Doing yoga classes and meditation
• Being more social and going out more
• Becoming more attractive to the opposite sex
• Had my first real present moment without the use of drugs

There are a few other, more subtle ones but for me it has been nothing short of an amazing journey. And this is only the beginning. Also I'm currently in a casual relationship for the first time in my life and having sex regulary. That was my goal in the first place because I had severe performance anxiety issues (Erectile Dysfunction). Now I don't even want to have sex as much - I want to channel my energy into more productive things.

 

Long list of benefits as stated by hundreds of people.

 

Why people who do NoFap become more successful

 

Discuss.

 

 

Edited February 7, 2016 by Neuroticon

[GeorgeLawson]

Thanks for sharing the NoFap video. It's right in that porn is very much an instant gratification thing, and takes a lot less effort than actually attracting women and having sex with them. 

It's so easy to skip straight to the rewards without seeing all the hard work that is put in to get them.

[denselayman]

it has benefits surely, but there is no need to market itas recepie for success and anser for what is all wrong in one's life....

it gives me clarity and awareness, due to my bad health issues i don't get too much other benefits.

it should be used as a theraphy and experiment, rather than implied way to greatness, but that's just my opinion,

things that u learn, say from six months or year staying clean will be there or rest of ones life,  from that point on person should really decide on they're further actions regarding it with no external influences.

[Stef]

4 minutes ago, denselayman said:

it has benefits surely, but there is no need to market itas recepie for success and anser for what is all wrong in one's life....

it gives me clarity and awareness, due to my bad health issues i don't get too much other benefits.

it should be used as a theraphy and experiment, rather than implied way to greatness, but that's just my opinion,

things that u learn, say from six months or year staying clean will be there or rest of ones life,  from that point on person should really decide on they're further actions regarding it with no external influences.

I'm not marketing it. Some people struggle with this, some don't. Most don't even realize it.

Sexual energy is the biggest driving force in the world and we should learn how to use it wisely,

[denselayman]

Just now, Neuroticon said:

I'm not marketing it. Some people struggle with this, some don't. Most don't even realize it.

Sexual energy is the biggest driving force in the world and we should learn how to use it wisely,

i'm not arguing that. you make valid point everything you present is of use.
it was just my worry that it might turn out into a crusade and persecution.

caution, that is all, i too wish to help and be helped in this matter, but in a meaningful way, rather than get shoved down my throat that permanent no fapway is one and only way to go if one is to recieve any improvement in life.

 

please, proceed.

[Fantastic_Times]

What I realized with porn is that it started a negative loop of thoughts and emotions  which would make me feel bad. So it would go like this: 

-feel sad/bored/frustrated/stress > sexual release releases dopamine > urge to release sexual tension and watch porn > after release thoughts would say: "you're worthless, you can't get a real woman and you have to resort to this". > feeling of sadness and depression >> cycle starts again. 

So I either cut out the negative thought or I cut out porn. I cut out porn for 2 weeks and I felt much much better about myself and my social life. Reintroduced porn and the problem came back. It's a form of self punishment sometimes which baffles me. I still allow myself to release sexual tension by masturbating without porn. In my personal case, masturbation is not the problem. Porn is also apparently tricking the mind into thinking that one is inseminating several women at once. That is why we men need to keep changing material so as to get off. 

I hope this helps. I do find the whole "nofap" to be quite unscientific and extreme. Yet, I hands down admire those who can go on without sexual release on command. 

 

Peace!

[Samuel Garcia]

1 hour ago, AlGrill said:

I strongly second that request, as I struggle for a long time now with this habit. I know it has some deep roots I have failed to discover yet. Some practical help or advice would be much appreciated.

Talk with someone who will want to help you; who will be your cheerleader if you don't have enough self-control.

Find out why you do so. Log your thoughts. Just be mindful of what comes to your mind to eventually take action on  your habit.

Check out the book 'The Marshmellow Test' by Walter Mischel. Helped me with self control but you might need go a lot further. Make 100% commitment (not 99%) to change now.

[Leo Gura]

I'm just curious, for those guys who feel that porn/fap is toxic, how often exactly are you jerking off?

Like 6 times a day? Lol

[Jecht Spencer]

5 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

I'm just curious, for those guys who feel that porn/fap is toxic, how often exactly are you jerking off?

Like 6 times a day? Lol

7. My personal record though I think is closer to 12. 

Swearing off porn is HARD... jacking off even HARDER... hehe see what I did there?

 Longest I've gone without jacking is probably 6 days. Serious problem. =.=

[Guest]

5 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

I'm just curious, for those guys who feel that porn/fap is toxic, how often exactly are you jerking off?

Like 6 times a day? Lol

I don't even jerk off once a week anymore. Still a waste of life force/energy. Also your body goes through a lot of trouble to create the sperm you just simply waste for a few seconds of relief.

What I'm doing now is practicing to have non ejaculatory orgasms so I can have as much orgasms as I want without wasting the energy. "The multiorgasmic man" is a great book for this issue, and even Napoleon Hill writes about this in his book "Think and grow rich". It's the chapter on sex transmution. You want to keep all the life force inside you to be strong and healthy.

[AHappyTeddyBear]

Don't masturbate to porn !!!

It will mess with your hormones and you will not get as excited during sex ! 

It is totally acceptable to masturbate once a day, just don't do excessive masturbation.

excessive masturbation is associated with health issues that might be caused by it. 

 

[Vincent Musanti]

That's great how much value that brought you. I have a question for those who have abstained. When you guys have started up again, did all of those benefits of nofap disappear? My longest challenge I have done was from June until October last year. Nothing really seemed to change. My body was telling me to start up again. So I did. But I was fine with it because after it all I realized that its basically a mental versus body battle. My objection was this: "If I have the awareness to separate the neurotic desires of the ego from the natural desires of the body, I would no longer be in conflict with my actions or myself". What do you guys think

[bazera]

Hmm, this is  a quite touchy thing to talk about for me, but nevermind

The thing is, I am trying to break the porn addiction and masturbation habbit for the last 4-5 years, but I failed and failed and failed.. I couldn't even stop myself from masturbation for 2 weeks, and watching porn and masturbation was like a daily thing for me, so, what did it cause? It got me depressed, so I was feeling so bad after every fapping, that I wasn't able to socialize, or do my daily things, I was just thinking about it all the time, how weak I was and so on. I had bad grades, bad relationships with friends or family members, nothing to say about intimate relationships (I haven't had any). I didn't care if masturbation cause any physical ilness, or if watching porn was the best thing in the world, I didn't care because my psychological state was miserable, I was just everyday fight with my higher and lower self, literally  I have tried so many fucking things to get that addiction off of me, but the habit was well build in me over the years.

So, why did I told you all of that, because I managed (don't ask me how, it's a different topic) and haven't masturbated for 3 months now, and I am not going to fall in the same pit again. I haven't watched porn for 3 months too, and I am not going to, because the state I was for the last couple of years because of watching porn and jerking off, was so bad, that I don't want to even remember it. And the best part is, there is a huge change in me during these 3 months, I've started exercising, relationships are much better, I've started working on new projects and so much more.. So I don't know, maybe you will say that masturbation once a week is not a bad thing to do, or even once a month, but to me, if I do it even once, I think that I will have to go the same road to breaking this habit once more, and I don't really want that.

Do you agree with me or not? And tell me please, if you think that I am wrong with anything.

[Dixi-Q]

Why is masturbation a bad thing? I can understand demonizing pornography up to a point. I mean if we can demonize masturbation, can we demonize sex as well?

Some say its different but I don't know it's still ejaculating either ways. Too much of it can be bad, just like everything else.

I think the real question here is how can one be more disciplined and do things in a moderation.

Edited February 7, 2016 by Dixi-Q

[Guest]

1 minute ago, Dixi-Q said:

Why is masturbation a bad thing? I can understand demonizing pornography. I mean if we can demonize masturbation, can we demonize sex as well?

Some say its different but I don't know it's still ejaculating either ways. Too much of it can be bad, just like everything else.

Exactly. From what I have learned, even ejaculation in sex is bad and men should only ejaculate on a rare basis, like once a month or something like that. Some say you should only ejaculate to create a child. That's why there is this practice for non-ejaculating orgasms. Then you can have as many orgasms as you wish and still keep your seed and your energy.

[Dixi-Q]

1 minute ago, Coach Vito said:

Exactly. From what I have learned, even ejaculation in sex is bad and men should only ejaculate on a rare basis, like once a month or something like that. Some say you should only ejaculate to create a child. That's why there is this practice for non-ejaculating orgasms. Then you can have as many orgasms as you wish and still keep your seed and your energy.

We can make as much opinions and theories we want or wish to follow as human beings, we're not animals that only act on instincts. My opinion on this matter is discipline. That is what we truly lack. (Including myself, which is why I have made a limit on the amount of masturbation I do)

[Ayla]

I have been in a sex-less relationship for 10 years. From 28 to 38. 

Masturbated for a while, but ... didn't do anything for me in the end. 

What I did notice, is that sexual energy is VERY powerful. It is our life force (I mean none of us would be here if it wasn't for that LOL).

So I started to play with it, transforming it into healing energy and creativity. I would, by breathing, getting it to sway all my body. All my cells. 

It is not lust I am speaking of. It is that wonderful energy that excites the being.... 

Anyway.. that's just a girl's perspective  

 

[Stef]

1 hour ago, Leo Gura said:

I'm just curious, for those guys who feel that porn/fap is toxic, how often exactly are you jerking off?

Like 6 times a day? Lol

The thing is, Leo, after a while you realize you don't have a safe zone. Even once a week is plenty to me. If I do it before bed it's hard for me to get up in the morning and I tend to be irritated easily. Also, mood swings. I used to do it almost every day through my teens and early twenties which burned a lot of energy and motivation. it's a lot harder to do it once in a while than not to do it at all - the dopamine spikes and orgasm in itself are too addicting.

I know for some it may sound ludicrous but after experiencing the benefits I no longer want to look back. In the future I see myself mastering karezza because even if sex is great, ejactulation still tends to be draining.

Edited February 7, 2016 by Neuroticon

[the dream]

1 minute ago, Dixi-Q said:

We can make as much opinions and theories we want or wish to follow as human beings, we're not animals that only act on instincts. My opinion on this matter is discipline. That is what we truly lack. (Including myself, which is why I have made a limit on the amount of masturbation I do)

I think limiting how much you masturbate is a good thing. That is what I'm doing and it's working nicely for me.

I stopped watching porn because I had problems with lasting beyond 5min in bed. Not watching porn and forcing myself to fantasize up situations etc pretty much fixed that (in broad strokes). Limiting how much I masturbate has given me increased focus and determination, especially in the arena of dating.