Tinder vs cold approach, is cold approach inferior?

[Karmadhi]

Hey

I wanted to make a thread because I have noticed in the gamer group in my city that a lot of the guys have a lot more results from Tinder than cold approach. Even the ones that are good tend to get a lot of their dates from Tinder because it is a lot more convenient for them.

Cold approach: You need to do a few hundred approaches to get some decent skill, very emotional difficult and takes a lot lot of time.

Tinder: You have to put some work up front with taking good pictures but then it is like passive income and you just need some decent text scripts which you can buy cheaply these days.

Are there any benefits to doing cold approach compared to Tinder? Especially result and quantitiy wise?

Maybe you can get a hotter girl from Cold approach if your skills are good but to put hundreds of hours of direct work rather than some basic work when you re taking a shit or going to work, it seems way more efficient to me.

It has made me loose a bit of motivation to do cold approach, are there any benefits to it over Tinder which would make worth the insane time and work it takes?

Result wise at least.

PS: Someone will probably say here that you need to be good looking or something for Tinder to work well and I think that is a bullshit myth which is not true. You need to look good on your PICTURES, very different thing. Most of the guys I know that do good on Tinder are normal looking (not ugly though) and they do very well (at least 1 date per week from it). These same guys used to do horribly on Tinder but once they upgrated to Platnum and got better pro pics their results skyrocketed. 

Edited January 19, 2023 by Karmadhi

[Tyler Robinson]

Tinder is usually a scammy place to get a date. 

Why in the world would a guy rely on Tinder is beyond me? 

Tinder is not known for quality dating and a lot of men have been conned there for their money etc. The girls want the guy's money is what I've heard. 

Those women are with other intentions that I wouldn't want to elaborate. 

No decent guy would ever want online dating to begin with. 

Most guys want a girl to hold their hand. They would want a real woman, a real friendship and intimacy. 

Serious men don't go on Tinder. 

 

[max duewel]

Tinder can give you results much faster in terms of setting up dates consistently. However, you still need game to give you the confidence to make the dates work for you. 

My experience is through a cold approach my results on tinder also got much better. Also, Tinder is not a sustainable strategy since you don't meet the highest quality woman there. You can't avoid approaching girls

Edited January 19, 2023 by max duewel

[something_else]

My experience with Tinder is that I've met like maybe 2 girls I'd consider high quality and compatible in 2.5 years. I've probably met maybe 25-30 girls total in that time?

Hinge is way better, and in London Bumble was exceptionally good. I was getting like 20 matches a day on Bumble in London, but my matches dropped literally to zero on Tinder while I was there. I can't think of a reasonable explanation for that. And then in my home city Bumble is unusuable. It's very weird.

If nothing else, this makes me dislike dating apps the most, they are really inconsistent and you're at the mercy of an algorithm that no one really understands. And it's almost certainly trying to extract money out of you rather than find you good dates.

For example there is anecdotal evidence that once you pay for tinder and then stop paying, your exposure is artificially limited because the algorithm knows if you don't get lots of matches anymore, you're likely to pay again. It would not surprise me at all if Tinder pulls shit like that.

Girls are also far more picky on Tinder. I've met 3 girls now on nights out who fully admit that they are like 10x more picky on dating apps than in real life.

It also doesn't really grow you as a person that much to use dating apps. You can have them as something that runs in the background but I wouldn't use them as your main way to meet girls.

[Tyler Robinson]

Tinder won't help you learn game. That's another point I missed. 

It doesn't grow you as a man. 

Honestly if I were a man, I would do hardcore street dating to up skills no matter the rejections. Any rejection would be fun. 

Gaming should be about learning rather than sleeping, sleeping is jhust a by product. 

 

[Karmadhi]

53 minutes ago, something_else said:

Girls are also far more picky on Tinder. I've met 3 girls now on nights out who fully admit that they are like 10x more picky on dating apps than in real life

True however the guys i said get like 10 matches a day anyway so it does not matter how picky girls are when you are getting results.

54 minutes ago, something_else said:

You can have them as something that runs in the background but I wouldn't use them as your main way to meet girls.

If you were meeting like 2 girls a week from it would you even bother still going out and doing approaches?

[Karmadhi]

1 hour ago, Tyler Robinson said:

Serious men don't go on Tinder.

Common myth. Almost every single guy and girl I have met has used it at least briefly. Very high value developed conscious people I know have used Tinder. Maybe not for a long time but still did. Half or something of all couples these days met online so it is no longer the case where online dating is used by weird people.

 

[Karmadhi]

1 hour ago, max duewel said:

you still need game to give you the confidence to make the dates work for you. 

It gives you massive date experience. If you go on 2 dates per week in 1 month it is already like 10 dates which is massive experience. 

By cold approach you re lucky to get 1 date a week while spending at least 10 hours a week approaching girls.

Yes cold approach will teach you how to do an approach but it does not necessary translate into good dating skills. 

To develop good dating skills you need to go on a lot of dates which is easier to do on Tinder.

Tinder costs 0 time because you can do it while commuting or taking a shit.

[Tyler Robinson]

@Karmadhi you can online date anywhere. You could online date on a spiritual community online. 

I was talking about Tinder though. 

 

[Karmadhi]

1 minute ago, Tyler Robinson said:

I was talking about Tinder though. 

 

Some of the most conscious kind caring respectful people in my life, both guys and girls have used Tinder at least once in their lives. People can be curious, lonely, in a bad place etc and give it a shot. Does not mean they used it for a long time.

[Karmadhi]

1 hour ago, Tyler Robinson said:

Honestly if I were a man, I would do hardcore street dating to up skills no matter the rejections. Any rejection would be fun

You cannot comprehend how hard it is for most guys to do approaches, especially on evening. Girls can be ruthless af in the evenings.

During the day they are way nicer but still many of them can get scared from you and it does not make you feel good.

1 hour ago, Tyler Robinson said:

Tinder won't help you learn game

You do realize that dating skills are not the same as pickup skills. You need dating skills but you can develop them from tinder because you will go on dates from it. As long as you are getting a supply of dates then who cares.

[Kid A]

18 hours ago, Tyler Robinson said:

Tinder is usually a scammy place to get a date. 

Why in the world would a guy rely on Tinder is beyond me? 

Tinder is not known for quality dating and a lot of men have been conned there for their money etc. The girls want the guy's money is what I've heard. 

Those women are with other intentions that I wouldn't want to elaborate. 

No decent guy would ever want online dating to begin with. 

Most guys want a girl to hold their hand. They would want a real woman, a real friendship and intimacy. 

Serious men don't go on Tinder. 

 

I don't get this demonization of Tinder. I have nothing but good experience with the girls I've met through it. Most of them completely normal and sweet girls who wants a serious relationship. Perhaps Norway differs from the rest of the world here...

My biggest problem with Tinder is that it is by far the most addictive thing I've ever come across. I use waaay too much time on it. 

[meta_male]

3 hours ago, Kid A said:

I don't get this demonization of Tinder. I have nothing but good experience with the girls I've met through it.

Same. I think people underestimate how well the app gets to know you based on your swiping. If you're acting needy you get needy in return.

[something_else]

1 hour ago, meta_male said:

Same. I think people underestimate how well the app gets to know you based on your swiping. If you're acting needy, you get needy in return.

This is not a good thing. I don't want my dating life determined by a mysterious algorithm that is there to make Tinder money, not to find me dates.