How Do I Learn To Commit 100%

[Something Funny]

I want to be able to say that I am going to do a thing and just do it, with no excuses or doubts.

How do I get to that level where I can say to myself:

- okay, I am not going to eat crap ever again

- I am going to meditate every day for a year

- I am going to spend 16 hours every weekend to learn programming

And just do it?

I've tried hundreds of times already. I've tried writing things down in my journal. I've tried creating goals. I've tried telling someone about it. I've tried sticky notes...

But I always quit, fail, get side tracked, lose focus, give up, etc.

I want to be able to trust myself and my words.

How do I change it?

[RedLine]

I have also been dealing with this problem all my life. There is not much you can do apart from massive balls and build habit.

 

Once I heard a guy saying he became productive by having a secretary working next to him so he will be ashame to procrastine looking entrentaiment on the internet wiht the woman watching. That´s a good trick buy you can´t alway rely on somebody else.

Edited January 9, 2023 by RedLine

[Something Funny]

@RedLine yeah, that's not really an option

[Eternal Unity]

If there's a will, there's a way.

[Say10]

You need discipline, start doing some kickboxing or any kind of martial arts.

You will be stronger both physically and mentally ,you will feel better and look better. Your body will crave healthy and rich food after good session. 

Try out Wim Hof breathing method before meditation, it will help you sink in deeper and feel relaxed.

[Something Funny]

@Eternal Unity  thank you

[Leo Gura]

Just decide to do it.

There is no other way.

Don't try to do it in all areas at once. Choose one thing to start with.

Your commitment also has to be realistic. 16 hrs of programming every weekend is not realistic so you will fail at that automatically.

Edited January 9, 2023 by Leo Gura

[Something Funny]

12 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Just decide to do it.

There is no other way.

It's like I've "decided" so many times already and failed that I am kind of losing faith in myself. But yeah, I understand that there's no other way.

12 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Your commitment also has to be realistic. 16 hrs of programming every weekend is not realistic so you will fail at that automatically.

But what should I do then if I already work full time? Even 16 hours doesn't  sound that much if we are talking about per week.

You yourself said that you need to work extra hard for a certain period to feto out of a wage slavery?

Edit:

Regarding trying one thing at a time. How do I know when I can move on to another thing? Should I wait 30 days, 90 days (assuming I can stick to my commitment for this period).

Edited January 9, 2023 by Something Funny

[Leo Gura]

9 minutes ago, Something Funny said:

It's like I've "decided" so many times already and failed that I am kind of losing faith in myself. But yeah, I understand that there's no other way.

Decide for real this time.

You were just kidding around earlier.

You have to hit a point of rock hard emotional leverage with yourself.

Quote

But what should I do then if I already work full time? Even 16 hours doesn't  sound that much if we are talking about per week.

You yourself said that you need to work extra hard for a certain period to feto out of a wage slavery?

1) You can't just bull your way out of wage slavery. A more intelligent approach is required. If your plan to escape wage slavery requires you to work impossible hours, that's a bad plan.

2) It is okay to crunch for certain periods of time, but this crunch should not be one of your 100% commitments. You can tell yourself that you will crunch as much as you are able, then you won't feel like a failure when you only code for 6 hours instead of 16. Don't make promises you cannot keep.

Your goals have to realistic.

Edited January 9, 2023 by Leo Gura

[Something Funny]

@Leo Gura okay, I get it.

Also, thank you a lot Leo. I am really grateful for you spending your time babysitting all of us.

I am crying in a positive way right now

[Ulax]

@Something Funny Imo, you likely have some sort of inner work issue, or perhaps something neurological or diet related, or some other blind spot. For example, you might have undiagnosed ADHD, or some self sabotaging unconscious cycles.

[UnbornTao]

35 minutes ago, Ulax said:

@Something Funny Imo, you likely have some sort of inner work issue, or perhaps something neurological or diet related, or some other blind spot. For example, you might have undiagnosed ADHD, or some self sabotaging unconscious cycles.

Yes, that's possible. But don't hide behind circumstances. In other words, don't use them as excuses, that'd be antithetical to commitment. Commitment demands getting it done no matter what challenges may come up.

Edited January 10, 2023 by UnbornTao

[Something Funny]

6 minutes ago, Ulax said:

Or some self sabotaging unconscious cycles.

Yeah, no shit, I probably have some of those

But what does it matter anyway. What I need to do stays the same: do personal development,  do spiritual work, meditate, and try again and again

1 minute ago, UnbornTao said:

Yes, that's possible. But don't hide behind circumstances. In other words, don't let them become excuses, that'd be antithetical to commitment.

Yeah, that too

[Ulax]

7 minutes ago, Something Funny said:

Yeah, no shit, I probably have some of those

But what does it matter anyway. What I need to do stays the same: do personal development,  do spiritual work, meditate, and try again and again

@Something Funny Nice dude.

Maybe some parts work, i.e. IFS, could help you reroute those potential unconscious cycles.

[Eternal Unity]

@Something Funny ?

[WelcometoReality]

@Something Funny Having a goal to do something x hours per day is fine but if you start by doing that you'll most likely fail.

I like starting small, like doing it for 2 minutes and setting up a time for doing it as well.

For example after my morning coffee I'll do programming for at least 2 minutes. That way there's the least amount of inner resistance to start doing it. And once started I usually do more than the 2 minute goal. A key point here is to pace yourself. When the goal is met and I don't feel like doing it anymore I stop and do something else.

After a month or so usually there's no resistance to do it anymore because it has become a habit and then I can up the goal by 5-10 minutes.

Also it's good to be able to visually track how it's going. X's on a calender works fine.

[ZenSwift]

Listen to shit loads of Wes Watson and embody his attitude towards life.

[JonasVE12]

Goals only work when they come from feeling.

[RedLine]

2 minutes ago, JonasVE12 said:

Goals only work when they come from feeling.

If I do what it comes from feeling I don´t even wake up from bed

[Loving Radiance]

@RedLine There is what you feel like in your lazy pig part, and there is what you feel like in your heart. Your heart makes you feel that sometimes you got to do difficult things. The lazy part doesn't feel that, ever. The difference in energy is subtle.

 

@Something Funny Small steps. That's what it means to be realistic. Almost any drastic change isn't long-term. But small changes every month are sustainable and realistic. Start with 5 minutes, heck, if that's too much even 1 minute. Then reward yourself for having done it for the day. With time you can do more.

Always feel into yourself if you feel capable to do more. There is a difference between a break in order to rest & regenerate and a break in order to give energy to and indulge in the toxic pleasure-comfort part.