A rant against polyamory

[Lyubov]

2 hours ago, Something Funny said:

@Lyubov it's your life so do what you feel like doing. Honestly speaking, from my perspective, it seems that you are doing some bullshit, and I wouldn't want to live like that, but that's just me.

I also don't really get why you are trying to complicate relationships so much and bring politics into it. My personal plan so far is more or less like that:

- find a girl who you are genuinely attracted to and who is genuinely attracted to you

- make sure that you are compatible when it comes to your consciousness levels, morals, worldviews, lifestyles, goals, etc.

- keep calm, build a nice loving relationship, and enjoy life

Simple

 

I don’t believe what I’m doing is bullshit but I do have my beliefs, double standards and preferences and I am working towards having a more truthful relationship with less self bias to it. It’s not so simple I believe at first but it definitely is something I can work on. There are a number of choices I’m making that I am working to become conscious of, reevaluate and change. 
 

I am complicating the relationship (so is she) but I’ve found that happens when people haven’t worked through all their beliefs. Relationships can be very messy and complicated sometimes when people want different things, double standards, or pasts, beliefs, we even bring what society says what a relationship should be into it as well. I won’t try and say I’m above that and I have the most conscious relationship where neither of us are creating negative emotions out of thinking we aren’t worthy of love. 

comparability is interesting because I think this can change over time and sometimes it takes time to real come to the conclusion neither person is compatible. At that point both people can be very intertwined and ending the relationship and starting over can  challenging. I don’t think it’s possible to just have one or two relationships and then just magically find the perfect person, maybe it happens for some and not all. We need to make mistakes and learn from them to relate to people better and be right within ourselves to maintain these healthy relationships.

 

probably 90% ofwhat I originally wrote just comes from the belief  that I don’t want to get married yet and still want to date around while she is ready to have a man fully commit to her, but I don’t want to fully commit right now at this stage in my life. 

Edited January 6, 2023 by Lyubov