Emotional Empathy

[IAmReallyImportant]

Do you think, it is important or is cognitive empathy sufficient? 

 

[IAmReallyImportant]

I think that is an important issue. Similar to guilt and shame, I think this isnt productive, as you feel bad and nobody gains anything.

Moreover, I think emotional empathy is an illusion and based upon projections.

Edited January 2, 2023 by IAmReallyImportant

[John Paul]

Emotional empathy is garbage unless you are like having sex or at a funeral/wedding or something… if not cognitive is enough 

[Loba]

On 1/1/2023 at 2:52 AM, IAmReallyImportant said:

Do you think, it is important or is cognitive empathy sufficient? 

"The Light in the eyes of others, they guide you on your way."

True empathy for another being is the only way to see it... or yourself... with any degree of accuracy.  Every issue we have ever faced on the planet comes from the root:  Humans not seeing the true nature of another thing.  There is so much information to be gleaned from looking at living things with the lens of empathy, in such a way where it becomes an experience in its own right.  You don't just See the thing anymore, you See through it and that soul that is within begins to breathe into your own.  To not use this superpower is a handicap, but so common that people forget this.

Edited January 4, 2023 by Loba

[John Paul]

Despite my previous post: if you’re in a situation where the amount you’re getting your buttons pressed/manipulated is outweighed by the joy of intimacy than it’s good 

[IAmReallyImportant]

3 hours ago, John Paul said:

Despite my previous post: if you’re in a situation where the amount you’re getting your buttons pressed/manipulated is outweighed by the joy of intimacy than it’s good 

That's true. For the reason, one has to able to switch it on and off, when appropriate.

4 hours ago, Loba said:

True empathy for another being is the only way to see it... or yourself... with any degree of accuracy

Please explain to me, why you think that emotional empathy enables one to see another being as it is or at least approximately. Because, for me emotional empathy strongly looks like projection and nobody can ever know, what some another being feels.

That is why looking at the effective truth described by Machiavelli turns often out like the most effective tool for decision making. Even though, it is just an heuristic and does not give one insight about the actual truth behind actions of others.

[meta_male]

@IAmReallyImportant Cognitive empathy doesn't give much insight into someone else's experience, so you can only take a guess. Emotional empathy is important for intimacy. It's also important for healing people's suffering. But it depends on your personality whether this is important to you.

[IAmReallyImportant]

3 hours ago, meta_male said:

@IAmReallyImportant Cognitive empathy doesn't give much insight into someone else's experience, so you can only take a guess. Emotional empathy is important for intimacy. It's also important for healing people's suffering. But it depends on your personality whether this is important to you.

Emotional empathy is also a guess. Most of the time even more inaccurate than cognitive empathy can be.

[John Paul]

@IAmReallyImportant you will likely feel a lot less joy in your life if you don’t have the opportunity to share emotional intimacy *with emotionally healthy individuals/families*

[meta_male]

@IAmReallyImportant I think I know what you're getting at. Do you have both cognitive and emotional empathy?

[IAmReallyImportant]

4 hours ago, meta_male said:

@IAmReallyImportant I think I know what you're getting at. Do you have both cognitive and emotional empathy?

Hard to say, but I think so. However, I don't care if people cry and as I once saw a dead human body lying on the street, I didn't feel anything. As I was 7 years old and my grandmother was about to die and sceramed all the time I made jokes about it to my parents. I compared the sounds she made to a dog I've always wanted. And my fellow pupils were shocked that I wasn't sad.

Or in one occurence I saw people punching someone almost to death. It was somehow shocking, but I was completely rational and just turned around and later called the police.

I don't turn happy if other people are happy around me and laugh.

But idk. as I recognize emotions and I also care about others and I feel responsibility and don't like it to lie. It makes me sad if people are unhappy and I want them to feel better. Would be hard to say if I have emotional empathy if I hadn't it in my life. 

Edited January 4, 2023 by IAmReallyImportant

[IAmReallyImportant]

In my teens I had PTSD so I felt fear. Nowadays only if something happens that reminds me on a traumatic event. But it is not much and disappears very fast.

[IAmReallyImportant]

And on the street I feel negative emotions when people crossing by. But it's more like disgust or aversion. Maybe it comes from me, because I often detest certain emanations. Like when someone is overconfident or insecure and then tries to compensate with false pride, for example. That's why I think I'm projecting emotions.

If I don't pay attention, people can push certain buttons by being insolent and arrogant. At one point I almost made someone loose his job for this, because I collected some people out of rage and also evidence for his misbehavior. I can get angry very fast.

That is why I think emotional empathy isn't good, because it can let you do bad or stupid things.

Edited January 4, 2023 by IAmReallyImportant

[IAmReallyImportant]

Or once as a child a friend fell in love with someone else's girl. I then thought about what you can do and then suggested to him to kill the other. I was 9 or so. Today, of course, I would never suggest that to anyone, but looking back, it was kind of funny.

Or once when I was about 7 years old, a sports teacher hit my buddy and I said we'd finish him off and tell him that he had sexually harassed him.

This whole thing has been on my mind lately, because I never thought about it before..

Edited January 4, 2023 by IAmReallyImportant

[IAmReallyImportant]

As I was 12-13 a traumatic event happend and after that I don't have much of these memories regarding similar behaviour. Only about moments where I should feel something according to others. Like the example with the dead body I have seen etc.  I was just highly non-agreeable etc. and am still.

Edited January 4, 2023 by IAmReallyImportant

[meta_male]

@IAmReallyImportant As long as you don't beat yourself up about it.

My best mate actually has a hard time picking up on emotions because he's in his logical thinking mode a lot more.

9 minutes ago, IAmReallyImportant said:

In my teens I had PTSD so I felt fear.

You ever talked to someone about this?

5 minutes ago, IAmReallyImportant said:

And on the street I feel negative emotions when people crossing by. But it's more like disgust or aversion. Maybe it comes from me, because I often detest certain emanations.

Yeah, this sounds like victim mindset. I notice this in me too from time to time. People are actually like mirrors.

[IAmReallyImportant]

Idk. if I am a psychopath. I did the PCL-R test and it stated highly psychopathic. However, I care about others etc. So it remains a mystery.

[IAmReallyImportant]

And I also have a sense of moral and good and bad. As a child I hadn't and I believe I still wouldn't have it today if this situation didn't happen.

But there were exceptions e.g. as a friend broke her arm I felt guilt.

Edited January 4, 2023 by IAmReallyImportant

[IAmReallyImportant]

6 minutes ago, meta_male said:

You ever talked to someone about this?

They put me in a hospital.

[IAmReallyImportant]

14 minutes ago, meta_male said:

Yeah, this sounds like victim mindset. I notice this in me too from time to time. People are actually like mirrors.

Idk. if it is that, but I don't think and just feel it. Then there is an impulse to subjugate them or make them feel worse. However, this happens in a state of low-energy. Like when I haven't slept for 24h or slept just a couple hours and am stressed. So rather rare moments.