I'm so happy

[Someone here]

17 hours ago, How to be wise said:

@Someone here You should cut out the cigarettes. You can’t be happy if you’re not alive. 

I didn't smoke for the past month. And I'm willing to continue. 

[Sincerity]

39 minutes ago, Razard86 said:

I used to do this, its so funny to see someone else doing this.....let me give you a tip!! If you do this to your friends in life, they will not interpret it is as love and will not enjoy sharing good news in the future with you. While I totally understand what you are saying, and was tempted to tell him the same thing, life experience has taught me that it breeds the opposite result. 

People can internalize your desire to ground them, as your desire to rob them of getting to experience the high of positive emotions. Ultimately we all know that all highs and lows return to baseline. But sometimes, people just want to get lost in those momentary highs for as long as they can. Don't become known as a party pooper who people say "I bet you are great at parties!" LOL.

It's a matter of what friends You have.

Good friends tell each other the truth and not keep each other in delusions.

If a naive man is told by another fellow man a harsh truth and he reacts negatively and rejects it pettily, he is not only naive but also weak. 

A quote from David Deida's book:

Quote

Choose men friends who themselves are living at their edge, facing their fears and living just beyond them. Men of this kind can love you without protecting you from the necessary confrontation with reality that your life involves. You should be able to trust that these friends will tell you about your life as they see it, offer you a specific action which will shed light on your own position, and give you the support necessary to live in the freedom just beyond your edge, which is not always, or even usually, comfortable.

Notice I told him that he's gonna make it and that even greater things are awaiting him. Is that not great news?

[Carl-Richard]

On 14.12.2022 at 1:05 PM, Sincerity said:

Not to be a bummer, but You know this will pass, right?

If it's growth, some of it will never pass. He won't ever have the thought of "I'm a loser virgin" ever again.

[Sincerity]

36 minutes ago, Carl-Richard said:

If it's growth, some of it will never pass. He won't ever have the thought of "I'm a loser virgin" ever again.

I beg to differ.

Again, I'd say that mind has an infinite capacity to forget AND remember. Also, old habits of the mind die hard.

One day You realize You've never been a loser and that life is perfect. The next day You forget and in your powerlessness question whether it's even worth living. And then it's all joy again. It's a matter of state. 

But of course real growth IS possible. You CAN in the long-term transcend limiting beliefs, ground yourself in more conscious states, learn to not be fooled by thoughts and fears, etc. It's just not as easy as "now I'm feeling on top of the world so this must mean I have reached the end!"

Also, when I said this will pass, I referred to the burst of joy. Obviously each experience "stays" with You to some extent.

At least that's all what I think. I'm only speaking from my experience and beliefs.

Edited December 15, 2022 by Sincerity

[Carl-Richard]

@Sincerity Unless you're fully enlightened, you'll have thoughts reminding you about things you need to do. If you do those things, those particular thoughts will subside. It doesn't matter if it's taking out the trash or getting laid. The more particular thoughts you ignore, the more chaotic your mind becomes. Having not done two things instead of one is twice the load on your mind. Also, the more you do what you need to do, the more you'll actually grow. It's only when you've exhausted most of the things you need to do that seeking ego dissolution becomes the appropriate step.

Edited December 15, 2022 by Carl-Richard

[Sincerity]

35 minutes ago, Carl-Richard said:

@Sincerity Unless you're fully enlightened, you'll have thoughts reminding you about things you need to do. If you do the thing, those particular thoughts will subside. It doesn't matter if it's taking out the trash or getting laid. The more particular thoughts you ignore, the more chaotic your mind becomes. Having not done two things instead of one is twice the load on your mind. Also, the more you do what you need to do, the more you'll actually grow. It's only when you've exhausted most of the things you need to do that seeking ego dissolution becomes the appropriate step.

I don't see how this is a response to what I wrote.

Perhaps we're coming from different places and thus misunderstanding each other.

Edited December 15, 2022 by Sincerity

[Carl-Richard]

30 minutes ago, Sincerity said:

I don't see how this is a response to what I wrote.

Perhaps we're coming from different places and thus misunderstanding each other.

I'm showing how personal growth leads to less suffering instead of reducing everything to spiritual growth.

Edited December 15, 2022 by Carl-Richard

[Sincerity]

1 hour ago, Carl-Richard said:

instead of reducing everything to spiritual growth.

Am I doing that?

Personal growth is certainly useful. I didn't say don't go get laid. By all means, go for whatever You need.

But also about this personal growth leading to less suffering... Well, I don't know. I'd say it's like an infinite game of whack-a-mole. You solve one of your "problems", then another one is born. It's not solving the root cause because the hunger for more is infinite - so is this really less suffering in the long-term? The game is "won" by letting it go, and that's one way of looking at spiritual growth.

Anyways, I still don't know how this relates to my responses. Either You missed my point or yours is flying over my head.

Basically what I said was for the guy not to be naive and get attached to this temporary surge of joy and think this is it. Because it’s gonna fade. And remembering that there is the possibility of true Heaven.

Edited December 15, 2022 by Sincerity

[Carl-Richard]

13 minutes ago, Sincerity said:

Am I doing that?

Personal growth is certainly useful. I didn't say don't go get laid. By all means, go for whatever You need.

But instead of celebrating that, you went "but have you heard about Jesus?". I'm not saying that's invalid, but it felt to me like it could've come from an unhealthy place. If that's a false assessment, then that's fine.

I'm only saying that not everybody is ready to leave their life as a person behind.

Edited December 15, 2022 by Carl-Richard